Personal Statement "Professional Experience"

[Chele]

Hi   ,

 

    I posted this in another thread but wanted some perspectives from Communication applicants.  First, a little background on my situation and what I am applying for:

 

Health Communications, I am primarily interested in cancer communication (patient clinician information exchange and cancer prevention communication).  I have lab experience (psych lab), TA experience, have a BA in media studies, a BA in psychology (both with 4.0 GPAs), and an MA in media industries, which I received in England (I received first-class honours).  

 

My top choice is Annenberg, and the prompt states:

 

The statement of purpose should discuss your potential research area or topic with the Annenberg School for Communication faculty or research centers. Please detail how your academic and professional background, interests, and preparation in the social sciences, the humanities and other studies support your research topic. The statement should also address the question of what career objectives an Annenberg degree would help you realize. The statement should be double spaced and must not exceed 1,000 words.

 

​I have included the aforementioned pursuits in my PS, as well as a bit about my dissertation and a few of the relevant projects I have done.  However, for 'professional experience', I wanted another opinion.  I competed in figure skating and was a professional coach for about 10 years.  I have included 4 sentences in my final paragraph about this, as I thought it was unique and relevant in terms of 'professional experience'.  The portion in my final paragraph regarding this states:

 

My academic training and unique experiences as a competitive figure skater/coach have given me a comprehensive understanding of health communication that extends beyond my work in the classroom.  As a coach, I played a vital role in shaping my students’ perceptions of health and was responsible for ensuring that they developed healthy behaviors early in life.  Through this work, I learned a great deal about human behavior and the processes that people go through when making informed decisions about health.  Fortunately, these experiences have greatly enhanced my work in the social sciences because they have allowed me to apply a first-hand perspective to my research.  Needless to say, my professional work has greatly influenced my research interests and my decision to pursue an Annenberg degree.

 

My question is this, should I keep this in or take it out?  Any insight would be greatly appreciated.  Thank you in advance.

[fuzzylogician]

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