GRE Issue Essay Practice

[spdunlap]

Greetings Grad Cafe,

I am requesting your feedback on my very first attempt at a a timed issue essay exercise. Initially I feel that I didn't completely respond to the second clause in the topic, and I also don't feel that my paragraphs smoothly and cogently connect. My method was similar to this : brainstorm and outline, write a thesis statement, write the body, write the conclusion, and from there create an intro sentence (s) that encompass the essay's main theme.I deactivated spell check and grammar assist on Word. I set myself a 25 minute alarm, which provided me with 5 minutes to edit and polish. Looking for your objective and professional feedback. 

 

Kindest Regards,

spdunlap

 

To understand the most important characteristics of a society, one must study its major cities.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

 

I disagree that studying the major cities is an essential part of understanding the most important characteristics of a society.  I attest that by studying the individuals within a society, rather than the cities in which they live, will glean the most insight into how and which characteristics become important to that society.

The citizens of a particular society are responsible for the most important characteristics for which a society is renowed.  For example, we can consider the small Alabama town of Bayou la Batre, where working from sunrise to sunset is sacrosanct in living a successful life. These citizens  are also highly regarded as successful, despite formal education, because of their strong work ethic. Because of the seasonal seafood industry in Bayou la Batre, these citizens rise early and are on the water late in to the night to ensure that the workday’s catch is enough for both profit and repast. It is in this small rural town of Bayou la Batre, aptly named by the early French settlers of the 1700s, where seafood first supplied fisherman their riches, and  from which the nearby large metropolitan city of Mobile derives its “seafood reigns supreme” characteristic. Without the contributions of the hard working citizens of Bayou la Batre’s seafood industry, Mobile would not be able to produce the largely recognized and most important characteristic of being the largest seafood port in the United States.

On a more global scale, we can consider the city of Toledo, Spain. Compared to nearby Madrid, Toledo is more compact and isolated; however, this is not to say that Toledo has had little impact on the artful and eccentric characterists for which Spain is most notably recognized. Toledo was home to many great artists, specifically El Greco, for which the art world has come to recognize as paramount. Toledo was also responsible for producing internationally desired and handmade swords and tile work. Without these contributions from Toledo, Spain would not be  epicenter for art and  that is it today.

In conlclusion, it  is the citizens who should be the paramount topic of erudite studies into the formation of a society’s most important characteristscs.