Crazy art history stories!

[mitzydoodle]

I thought it would be fun to start a more light-hearted thread to help beat the waiting blues. Please share funny stories of things professors have said/things you have read that either made you smile or ran a chill up your spine. Hopefully this will make waiting a little more entertaining, and help pass the time!

I'll start:

I had a professor of Spanish art tell a story of when she was studying in Spain. The class was held in the Prado (this was decades ago) and her professor was discussing Titian's use of glazes. The professor then THREW A GLASS OF WATER ON THE PAINTING, and for a moment you could see the layers of glaze. Crazy!!!

I have another friend who is working on 16th century Florence. She was reading a very logisitical (i.e. boring) letter in the archives. The letter closed with "then the dwarf killed his servant and fled. Noone has seen him since."

Would anyone care to continue? :-)

[RedPotato]

Would anyone care to continue? :-)

Fact from my Conservation of Art Materials:

1. In the middle ages, the pigment dragonblood was believed to be the result of a dragon sitting on an elephant.

2. The pigment Indian yellow has only one historical record discussing its origin, a cow would be force-fed mangos and the urine would be collected and dried for its color.

[RedPotato]

sorry, double post.

Edited February 1, 2010 by RedPotato

[jmb04]

Not a crazy story, but along the same guidelines of being lighthearted:

Please tell me I am not the only one who has ever played impromptu art history charades, or a similiar arthist-themed game.

Popular works depicted: JL David's Oath of the Horatii and Manet's Olympia

I did this as an undergrad and now I miss having art history cronies.

[mitzydoodle]

@RedPotato- Love it!

@jmb04- I've never done charades, but I have done a version of Trivial Pursuit....mostly about Florence. One of my favorite categories: mendicants. Ha!

Edited February 1, 2010 by mitzydoodle

[jmb04]

Speaking of games, I played Cranium not too long ago and the category was unscrambling a person's name. Hint: pop artist.

When the opposing team read out the hint, I blurted out "Andy Warhol!" without even seeing the card.

Them: "Hey that's not fair, you've obviously played this game before!"

Me: "Uh no, I'm just an art historian."

haha!

I wish someone would make art history Monopoly. (This is how big of a nerd I am)

[RedPotato]

I wish someone would make art history Monopoly. (This is how big of a nerd I am)

I'd buy it! Think about what they pieces could be ... Jeff Koon's Puppy and the Column of Trajan! /dork.

My studio arts friends and I would play art history pictionary to study for our intro to art history exams.

Edited February 2, 2010 by RedPotato

[mitzydoodle]

I'd buy it! Think about what they pieces could be ... Jeff Koon's Puppy and the Column of Trajan! /dork.

My studio arts friends and I would play art history pictionary to study for our intro to art history exams.

Monopoly could be really interesting...the spaces could be either 'works of art' or museums. And the community chest/chance could be free admission to a museum (instead of get out of jail free- but you would use it to avoid paying 'rent') and other cards for restorations/acquisitions. Ok, now we can see my dorkside coming out-- but I won't stop there. I did my undergrad in DC and would study for my Intro courses at the National Gallery- I was smitten from the beginning.

:-D

[jmb04]

Monopoly could be really interesting...the spaces could be either 'works of art' or museums. And the community chest/chance could be free admission to a museum (instead of get out of jail free- but you would use it to avoid paying 'rent') and other cards for restorations/acquisitions. Ok, now we can see my dorkside coming out-- but I won't stop there. I did my undergrad in DC and would study for my Intro courses at the National Gallery- I was smitten from the beginning.

:-D

For more lightheartedness while we "wait it out" together:

The spaces ought to be museums. Instead of hotels and houses, the musuems should try to collect famous artworks. So if someone lands there, then the admission (i.e. rent) is much more expensive.

Instead of the railroads, they should be famous architectural or archeological sites.

Instead of JAIL, it should be called Post-doc Purgatory. Instead of "get ouf of jail free card," you can get "TENURE CARDS." hehehehe

The community chest card "Congratulations, you've won 2nd prize at a beauty contest, collect $75" should be replaced with "Congratulations, you've won a Getty Research Institute Fellowship. Advance to Associate Professor," or "Congratulations, your book has sold 20 more copies. Collect $75."

Another card: "An established art historian has reviewed your book and called it dull and unimaginative. Go directly to Post-doc Purgatory. Do not pass GO, do not collect $200."

[mitzydoodle]

More art-opoly ideas:

The Income Tax space should instead be Restoration/Conservation fees: Pay $200 or 10% of your assets.

Chance/Community Chest:

Your museum acquires a rare Greek vase: collect $200

and

Your are fined for acquring a Greek vase on the Black Market. Pay $200

and

You take a research trip to Italy. Lose a turn.

and

A work of art is stolen from XXX museum. Pay $250 and lose a turn to retrieve it.

This is too funny!

[losemygrip]

Worth resurrecting this relatively dead thread:

Everybody "of an age" who went to Harvard has a Sydney Freedberg story.

He once walked into a classroom, removed his glasses to clean them, and said in that ponderous, affected accent of his, "I believe that I am slowly going blind. And when I do, I shall become an iconographer."

Story 2: former mentor of mine labored all semester on a ridiculous topic assigned by Freedberg for an Italian Baroque course (something absurdly broad like "Classicism in Roman Baroque painting"--in fact I think that was it!). His monstrously long paper (about 40 pages) was returned without a single mark except on the first page: "B+ Not bad"

[brownbear]

besides museums, art historian monopoly should surely include universities... perhaps "renting" as an adjunct, or you get to 'buy' it if you make it as a professor.. haha

[Herbie]

Sidenote: my sense of humor is very dry.

In my Art and Architecture of Ancient Egypt II course:

"What's a pyramid?" <- cringe

In my non-Western survey:

"This book was written by white people. What do they know?" (Read: Professor is white). Cue professor response: "What do you know?"

Mmm. Man. I'm pretty sure there are some others. My professor of Northern Ren gave us an extra credit half point on the exam if we put that van Eyck was "the shit."

[kuniklos]

One of my professors was talking about a project she wa working on during her MA in Italy. She literally went through boxes of dismembered stone penises and had to try to match them to their original statues. XD

More of the funny of stupidity, I was a TA for two years...and man, I had some ridiculous students. I had the pleasure to teach a few classes so I was able to really engaged some...interesting things.

Me: Can anyone tell me what a basilica is?

Student: Isn't that a cooking spice? You know, for pizza?

Me: Showing an early image of Jesus as the shepard) Can someone identify this person and tell me what clues you in to his identity from what we have learned?

Student: Caesar! He's wearing a toga. Only Caesar wears one.

Me: I'm sorry, but not. He's actually wearing a tunic, and Caesar was a title.

Student: I have to disagree. I'm in a fraternity, I know that's a toga and it's a Caesar.

Also, my grandmother recently bought a lovely woven poncho. What she didn't realize that the embroidery was of a fertility god from mesoamerica with a large erection. She about crapped herself when I told her.

[losemygrip]

A former professor told me of his/her qualifying exams in ancient Greek art a the Institute of Fine Arts:

Was shown a black-and-white photo of the severed hand of a statue (or maybe it was a plaster cast? can't remember. . . ) Anyhow, from just the hand s/he was to date, place, attribute (if a known artist or school), and otherwise completely contextualize. And comment on the relevance and meaning of the style and period. So imagine if you will--if you got the initial attribution wrong, with every succeeding minute of your response you just work yourself in a deeper hole.

As crazy as it sounds, that's what you have to work with in Greek art. I learned a lot about art history when I did work in Greek art.

[tendaysleft]

Ahaha I just wanted to share this incredibly random "crazy art history"-related clip: