Rliggs

I am in need of a vent session: I am torn between 2 phd programs. One is a top school, everything I need/want, offered full funding, and is close to my hometown. The other has equally great researchers but did not offer me any funding. However, my boyfriend would be able to move with me to that location because of his work, but not to the better top school. If we moved together, it would take a significant burden off me for navigating through being unfunded, and the program admissions team seemed extremely optimistic in my ability to achieve funding (the tuition waver is really the most important if my boyfriend covers rent and living for a year until I can get funding), however nothing is guaranteed. I feel like I'm in a teen romantic movie where I drop everything and go to the school that allows my boyfriend and I to be together, but for some reason, the notion seems to depress me. Also, he seems very much against long distance, consistently giving me mixed messages that "we will get through it together!" and "ugh, you know LDR are really hard..." Blah!! Alright I'm done complaining.

Hey guys! Was hoping to get some advice on this: I got into three different PhD programs, all that I really like. One of them (USF) accepted me, but gave me an offer without funding. I talked with a contact at the school to gauge what this meant (are mentorship opportunities the same? success with external funding? how successful have unfunded students been in the past at securing research and funding?). He seemed to be incredibly optimistic, telling me that many students choose to attend USF unfunded and all have eventually received external or school based funding (based on their hard work) and that there are plenty of research opportunities. I really like USF, but I have funded offers at other schools. Does anyone know if being unfunded is has terrible as I originally thought? Any suggestions? Is it worth the uncertainty? Do you know anyone who has done it? What struggles are involved? Any advice is very much appreciated!