DStory247

Here's my situation- I finished undergrad in 4 years, took two years to work in industry, and am now going back to grad school for 4 more years. When my girlfriend at the time and I started dating, I had one year of undergrad left, and she had just transferred to a new school and had 3 years left. After a year of dating, (and after I graduated,) we moved in together. For the next two years I supported the two of us, (and our 3 dogs) so she could focus on finishing school. We both insisted that she have a degree. So she graduated in May with her BA, we got married two weeks ago, and we are moving from TX to CA in 2 weeks. I will be on stipend, and she will be starting her own career. Hopefully the two of us will make close to what I did by myself in industry. The point is, there's no reason I can think of why you would not be able to support both you and Brian once you graduate. I did it for two years, and now that I am going back, she will be supporting me along with my stipend. Our careers ladders were about as misaligned as they could be. If it's important enough to you to be with Brian, and him with you, y'all can figure it out.

I bet he was talking about HIS group- One of Sharon Walker's students told me that the water PIs started meeting together just recently, and it's simply to keep everyone up to speed on what's happening in the world of water, but they all still maintain their own group identities. Sorry if that's confusing... That would be very hard for me; I want to keep my Ninja650 forever. I want to buy more bikes in the future, but I never want to have to sell her. My dad and uncles and cousins and I are all taking a 3000 mile trip in Colorado in June, so that may be my last big hoorah for a while, but CA is very motorcycle friendly, and I'm glad to have it to get around on and play with. Are you absolutely sure you can't keep it? I'll need a riding buddy! Glad to meet you on FB, I look forward to meeting you and the other members of our cohort in person in September!

Without knowing anything about you or your background, I would generalize and say that you may just not have a hang of what being a PhD student entails yet, which would be understandable considering it appears you officially begin in the fall but you and this other girl are trying to get a head start... Correct me if I have interpreted that incorrectly... If this person is already a graduate student, they may be able to help you understand how to properly process your uncertainties if you are just honest and talk to her about it. If you don't feel you have the relationship with her required to do such a thing, it may be better to go straight to your PI, (but I don't understand how you already have one if you don't start until the fall...?) I don't know your husband either, but at first glance it appears he is either unsure of what to advise and is going with a general encouragement, or he may have gone thru the exact same experience and knows that it just took him believing in himself to get started. Again, there's too much information lacking for me to really speculate with much accuracy. I will say that in my undergrad I struggled with "Impostor Syndrome" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome) and it was quite debilitating at times. However, now that I'm more cognisant of this, I am being much more deliberate about being proactive and recognizing my strengths and my accomplishments. If that's possible you are dealing with this also, I would encourage you to not hold it in and talk to your loved ones about it, or discuss it with us on here who are here to encourage each other! Cheers!

Well, I went to a small liberal arts school for my undergrad degree, and the naturals sciences department was very small. So much so, that many of the classes I needed were only offered in one section, so I, too, was bound by a fixed schedule for most of my classes. But at UCR, if you take the undergraduate engineering courses first, you will most likely have more flexibility. But, when it comes to the graduate level courses, we may again be bound by one or two sections of each course, simply because the number of graduate students will be small compared to the undergrads. Overall, it is in the best interest of us and the department to make sure we have the knowledge we need to be successful researchers, so I fully believe we will be supported if we choose to take the undergrad offerings first, and the graduate level offerings afterwards. As far as PIs go, I've talked to many; Walker, Jassby, Mark Matsumoto, Akua Asa-Awuku, David Cocker, Haizhou Liu. The first quarter we are there we are required to sit in on the weekly group meeting of 1-3 PIs in order to find our potential matches. Fortunately, all of the water PIs have their group meetings together, as do all of the air PIs. So I will get to spend time with everyone I want! Right now, Cocker and Walker are my top choices. I grieve for you having to sell your motorcycle What do you have? I do have a facebook page, you can befriend me at https://www.facebook.com/drew.story.52

I did not do my undergrad in Chem Engineering. I did my undergrad in Physical Sciences. From talking with the graduate student advisor, Sharon Walker, I am under the impression that I do not have to make up for undergrad courses. Howver, if I wish to take the undergrad courses before taking the graduate level engineering courses, I am welcome to do so. This would mean I may be taking courses in my 2nd year, which most BS Engineers do not do. I will probably go that route, to ensure I am prepared for the qualifying exams at the end of Year 1, which I heard were undergraduate level in content. According to one professor, Dr. David Jassby, roughly 25% of UCR's CEE grad students came from a non-engineering major, so we won't be the first, nor the last, to go this route. With your biotechnology degree, you will undoubtedly fit right in. I don't know how much research you've done into the PIs at UCR, but I imagine Dr. David Kisailus' work may spark your interests. He does a lot of work with biomimetics. Fascinating stuff, just not my cup of tea. I enjoy riding my motorcycle, playing sports at a recreational/competitive level, and spending time outdoors. I, too, want to engage in the rec center activities! My girlfriend has her degree in Fine Arts, and is looking for graphic design jobs and teaching jobs. What does your boyfriend do?

Ah! I love St. Louis... I almost chose WashU over UCR! Where are you doing your internship? Anyways, I don't know what you are used to in terms of college campuses (where did you do your undergrad?), but I consider UCR's campus fairly large. It's not so spread out that there is vast amounts of wasted space between buildings, but neither is it crammed into a small geographical area. What land there is between buildings is well kept and can be used for studying or having a picnic, whatever floats your boat. It is fairly flat for California, but still has more hills than what I'm used to in Northeast Texas. There are small mountains right near the edge of campus that you can see anytime a building is not between you and them. There is a large amount of vegetation, which I enjoy, ranging from grasses to shrubs and plenty of trees. I was worried about moving from the lush region I have lived in my entire life to a desert, but UCR really doesn't seem that way. There are multiple libraries, an older general one, and a newer "science" library. The recreation center is nice, and is being added onto in a major way as we speak. I did not eat any meals on campus, but there were plenty of cafes and restaurants around and at the HUB (Highlander Union Building). I will most likely move around September 7th-ish. Give me a week to move in, and then be there for orientations. I think you, as an intl. student have your orientation sooner than that, correct? My girlfriend is looking for jobs in the area, so that will play a role in our location, but if I have my preference, we'll live within 15 minutes of the campus.

Both Air Quality systems and Water Quality systems are my areas of interest. I am ecstatic about both the breadth and depth of both of these areas at UCR. I do not know anyone else who will be in our cohort, but I met several current UCR students on my visit to the department in March. I will be looking for housing off campus, but something relatively close. When will you be arriving?

Glad to hear it, AKL! Tell us about yourself...

This sums up my entire academic career up until now. As I prepare for my next step in the journey, I'm glad to know that I am not alone with this struggle, and appreciate the wise words and advice everyone has offered.

Anyone else coming to UCR this fall, or just me and BerenErchamion???

RandiZ, congrats on your fortuitous circumstances, and thanks for the tips! I hope everything goes off without a hitch for you. I'm just about ready to list my home with a flat-fee-MLS service: anything else anyone wants to contribute before I hit "go"?!?

MadScience, that sounds like the way to do it! How did you find this $300 service? I, too, am a control freak and don't have the patience for a realtor's bullshit. Sounds like you've got it made in the shade! I hope I'm half as fortunate. You mind me asking what state you're in?

MadScience, Did you do FSBO or use an agent? What caused them to put such a large deposit down? Did you ask for one? The option 2, renting back from them, does sound ideal to me. I did not know if this was commonplace or if the buyer would laugh at the thought. I am about ready to list it, just trying to decide how to do so- FSBO (and if so, which website(s) to use) or a realtor. I'm almost sold on the FSBO route. TakeruK, There is no university housing at my school that will allow 3 dogs I would like to move in sooner if they will allow it. I'll have to check into that. Thanks, I'm glad to know others are in my shoes, and I look forward to all future responses!

After graduating from undergrad in 2011, the last thing I wanted to do was go to grad school. I rented an apartment for 6 months, said "To hell with rent" and bought a house. I'm very glad I did, but I now have the responsibility of selling it in a 5 month timeframe, and figuring out where to live until September. Best case scenario: Buyer agrees to let me stay in the house until I 'm ready to move regardless of closing date. I'd even continue to pay my current mortgage note to the new owner. But what if they refuse that arrangement? I can't afford not to sell my house just because I want to stay an extra few months. But I, my SO, and our 3 dogs cannot easily find a place to stay on short term either. Anybody have any experience with this?

Hey Zabius, I like seeing the results of your poll and comparing them to this poll: My #1 definitely changed throughout the process as I got a more accurate feel for each department and how each place would prepare me for my career. However, my top 3 stayed my top 3 until the very end, and I was very fortunate to have the opportunity to be able to choose between two of them.