chaos_04

Hello, I am in my second year of a two years masters program. School has been my life ever since I can remember; however, all the sudden I am questioning everything I have chosen for myself. I worry whether or not I will get into the PhD program I applied for or whether I will find a good job. I stress about the impression I make on others, particularly other academics. Although i previously was very confident in my work, I am now second guessing everything I have done. I keep double checking all my work- even from as far back as two years ago! I re-run all my analyses to make sure the numbers match up, and now I am taking it a step further by double checking all my references to make sure I did not misquote them or accidentally plagerize. I am not sure what is going on but I feel helpless and desperate. The anxiety inside of me is making me sick. I don't want to do anything. I feel guilty of ... what I am not sure. I just feel like everything I have ever worked for is going to be taken away from me. I think about suicide often, though I would never do it. I just want to feel happy and secure with my decisions, and feel worthy of what I have earned instead of worried about mistakes I might have made or will make. Just wondering if anyone has felt this way about grad school life? I try to talk to others about it, but it feels like no one really gets it. Thanks.