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yazzmin841

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    Dallas
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    neuroscience

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  1. I am so glad that somebody brought this up!! It feels good to see that I am not the only one! Now listen to my story, I was to choose between two different fields which made the desicion too hard for me, first choice was clinical psychology Ph.D. with 15K a year in a decent but not so prestigious school (#116 in rankings), location was suburban and not exactly where I want to live either. Second choice was a Ph.D. in Neuroscience in a really prestigious school (#20 in rankings), although they are doing something totally different from what I did until know and what I have always planned to do in the future, and the money was better (28K a year) location was better (urban& where I live right now).The decision was hard for me because I want to work with humans, although I like neuroscience and find it really interesting, I was not sure I want to study in a molecular level using animal models. And then after lots of thinking, I decided on school#2 which is prestigious and would provide me with much better opportunities in academia afterwards, however after I made the decision, that day that I called the other school and said that I was not coming, I felt soooo bad, almost like sick. I felt that down feeling all day, mourning just as you say, it is like having an abortion and mourning on the baby and imagining what he/she would be like if he/she was born. Because as somebody here said before, you are not only choosing the school but you are also choosing what kind of a person you are going to be, what your future is going to be like etc. Then the next day, I saw this email from the other professor in the school I declined, saying that "I just wanted to confirm your decision once again before I contact anybody else" Oh god! After I got that email, with that kind of emotional situation, I immadiately called the professor back and told him that I am not sure of the decision and I really felt bad afterwards etc, and he said he would like to give me couple more days to think. And then what happened, my decision did not change!! When I think rationally, the school 2 makes more sense in many dimensions! It is an opportunity that I at least would like to try! So again the monday of April 15 week, I called the professor in school 1 and told him my decision is the same. But I really had an emotional crisis in between as I said before. And again I am so glad that someone brought this up, because after I felt that sad after my decision, I was feeling guilty sometimes with questions like "did I make a decision against my gut feeling, do these emotions try to tell me something about which decision would be better for me?" But after reading all these posts and talking to couple of friends, I am almost surethat the same "mourning" would happen even if I went with the other school. This time I would felt like "did I make the mistake of my life, turning down a great opportunity?" So anyways, I think there are times in life that you should make a decision and dont look back afterwards, becuase sometimes you can't just know which one is going to be better for you, you have to just choose a way, and see how it works for you. And in the end I listened to my mind, and I think decisions with mind are much more reliable than decisions with emotions sometimes, especially with decisions of professional life, like this. And now, I feel good about my decision and I feel that I am going to be successful, well hopefully it is true, anyways, best wishes to everybody!
  2. Just an update, I finally made my official decision which is going to PhD in Neuroscience in my dream school, and I feel so relieved. This decision feels so right right now and I don't even know why I doubted that much. Hope everybody else feel the same way I do with their decisions at this point!
  3. OK something really weird happened Yesterday I turned down the offer of school 1, and afterwards I felt extremely uncomfortable, I just felt that pressure in my chest, the gut feeling telling me I am doing something wrong. And today I checked my email again, and I saw the professor from School 1 sent me an email saying I would like to check in with you for the last time before I give your offer to someone else because I have the feeling that you are more interested in clinical psychology. And after I saw that email, I immediately called the Prof back and said I am still unsure and I would like couple more days to think about. So I cant help it, my gut feeling tells me I should go for clinical psychology, would it be so idiotic of a decision to turn down the offer of the big school for the sake of doing something you really want in a relatively smaller but a decent school?
  4. Thank you everybody! I just wanted to let you know I finally made my decision, I decided to give a try to neuroscience and see how it goes, and to find a way to make it work for me. I just realized that I am not that passionate about counseling people for a life and might do better as a scientist. We'll see, best of luck to everyone!
  5. thank you for the replies!! OK the thing is a switch between two departments sounds not very probable, since they are totally under different divisions, neuroscience is under division of basic science and clinical psychology is under division of clinical science, so basically they are not very related at all And about working in a lab, in my neuroscience training I did not do any bench level lab work, the project I work in is human based, like neuropsychology and fMRI(which I like doing). So here is a thing, I have this gut feeling that I am not meant to work in a lab dealing with molecules and rats, but actually I have never tried it, so I can't really tell if I would like it or hate it, but what if I hate it?
  6. I am in between two options: 1) It is a B school, Clinical Psychology PhD, it is 120something in the rankings, it is a good, decent school and is known well in Texas are though not very prestigious, gives funding around $15000/year. The faculty and people were really nice in the interview, but the research facilities are not that good, there might be some funding and recruiting people for the study issues. The area is 1hr drive to Dallas, it is a relatively small town. The professor over there really wants to get me into the program and I will probably get a lot of individual attention with a strong mentorship model. 2) It is definitely an A school, it is Neuroscience PhD, 20 in the rankings, has a huge reputation nationwide, has great research facilities, and it is in Dallas(which is a place I would prefer to live over the other and I already live here). Stipend is also much better, it is around $28000/year. Huge faculty size, though since they are all very high reputation people, not much individual attention as opposed to the other school. You might be thinking 'are you crazy, it is better school and better paying and in big city so why are you even considering the other?' OK, here is the answer, clinical psychology is what I am more passionate about, if I go to neuroscience, it is really in basic science and molecular level, and I am going to be working all day in a lab with rats and molecules, which is really not my thing. Actually I am finishing my masters in neuroscience this year and I really enjoyed the program, it is not that I do not like neuroscience, it is just I like working with actual people and I do not want to lose the human contact. My interest is more in that way too, I like focusing on the social side of events, reducing people to molecules and rats is too reductionistic to me. And another thing is if I go for neuroscience, there would not be an option other than academia and research life long. What if I want to have my own business? If I go to clinical psychology PhD, I will always have that option available. On the other hand, the Neuroscience PhD in the top school could open me many doors and a bright career and I might have an option to continue post doc or do research in Ivy leage universities. One other thing is, I dont have much of a background in basic science (molecular level and laboratory work wise), so if I go to that Neuroscience Phd, I am supposed to work very very hard in order to close the gap between me and other people coming from more molecular level working backgrounds. Please help me somebody, I never imagined making a decision would be that hard! I just go back and forth between the two and can not make my decision!!!
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