crayolacat

I'm currently in a night MS program. I told my job that this semester was just killing me and took several days off to do homework/finals. Actually, it has all been PhD application stuff.

It does sound like you are turning something not very much into something very much. That could just be in how you told the story, but that's what it sounds like. Your new comment that it reminds you of a previous bad person may be the reason why. Your gut could be right... or it could be being hijacked by the similarity. If your school has free counciling, or if you can afford it I would suggest a check-in with a councilor to discuss it further and figure out which it is so that you can react appropriately. You have your whole life ahead of you, it would be great if a small intervention now would give you a gut that you can trust.

I have read that because they are all inflated, favorable comparisons (especially statistics) against other students are especially meaningful. So the "that almost never happens" is supposedly code for "I really mean it. for this one"

I think that too. But then I look at my CV and my LORs (two of LOR writers gave me copies) and I'm surprised that person described in those documents is me. So... are you being realistic in evaluating yourself? You've probably done some cool stuff too.

I would suggest going to linkedin.com, join the pharma groups there, and ask there if you haven't already. There may even be some groups specific for biostats people (I've never searched for that).

On my documents, the registration number has a dash. On the website, you have to enter it without the dash. Could that be it? Also, I would type it. Sometimes copy/paste messes things up by catching a random space or some other formatting item.

Your first two paragraphs were of the "When I was a child..." variety. The advise I have read has been not to do that. I think I might start with something that you would consider to be an experience from your mature self that made you decide you were hooked (as the writing hook, heh) and needed to continue toward your PhD.

Discussion forum addict. This one and the philosophy who_got_in. Haven't looked at my applications, not even once, but maybe the addiction will shift in the mid-February time range. If I survive until then.

I have no idea how I will survive until 15 April, much less keep my job. Not sleeping, anxious all the time, barely productive. For philosophy, there is another website with MUCH conversation going back several years, like some kind of acceptance letter p)rn. I have read all of it. OMG!