Rachaelski: I feel for you. I am also married, but my husband is coming with me if we get the FB. It must be a really tough choice to make for you - is there possibly a way your husband would go with you? Maybe something he could do during the time you are there? Photography? Documentary? Research?
Regarding my other alternative fellowship - it's an internal one and financially not as adequate as the FB - so we will just have to fasten our belts and enjoy the ride anyway.