Wow--this is a tough situation.
Personally, I take the funding issue seriously. I know some people would say, "It's Stanford--go for it!" but debt is pretty expensive these days, and that's in the best-case scenario when everything works out--you graduate, you get a job, etc.
I had an instructor in college who got into Stanford for English (PhD), and opted to go to a state school instead, because they paid her way, and Stanford offered nothing. (She was excellent, BTW! Silly Stanford!) So it does happen. She was older and had a family and "no debt" was really important to her (especially given the field).
Going for a PhD when you didn't intend to seems a bit unusual to me. . . But maybe it's something you should explore, to make sure you wouldn't be passing up something you could potentially enjoy doing (short-term or career-wise). I was under the impression that in some of the more technical areas, a PhD is an asset. Maybe do a quick search of jobs and see if any that require it would be interesting to you.
Just a random thought: I know a lot of engineers get MBAs to advance (they've told me you can move through the ranks with a master's in business; and most were kind of burnt out on engineering-specific work at their companies, and looking to get more into the business side of their company); is that an option?