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LizzieB

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Everything posted by LizzieB

  1. Hey all, Thank you for the sincere advise. As far as "the rest of the story" that some of you mentioned - I guess my first year I really overloaded myself, so I was having trouble getting things completed. I definitely acknowledged that. We had a frank discussion about it, she told me to work harder on keeping up, and that was that. Ever since then I have really tried to improve my habits and my situation. I got everything off of my plate that I possibly could. I have worked really hard to keep to a schedule. I have never been a morning person, but I even trained myself to wake up at 6am every morning and now I couldn't sleep in if I tried. I was feeling really good about myself, and I thought she had noticed the improvements. Like I said, I am definitely on-track to finish everything on time this semester, which is why it really threw me for a loop when she said I was behind on my coursework responsibilities. As far as calling Enterprise - I truly feel that I have not set a precedence with her for lying or "playing hooky." If I have set that somehow, I think that is something we definitely need to talk about. I was pretty shocked to be honest. You know, there was a lot more to the story - for example, my fiance's truck is my backup plan, but it too had broken down 2 days before my car. Some of the rental places were going to have cars but not early enough for me to be on time for class. But I always thought that in a professional situation, you spare your "boss" the details. I didn't want to start going into a million little things, so I said no one had a car available. Maybe it wasn't the whole truth, but it wasn't really a lie. I don't know. It's still bugging me, and I've had nightmares every night. I'm trying not to think about it, but I'm scared to death that I'm going to come on Monday and she's going to tell me I'm kicked out of the program or something. Logically, I know I haven't done anything bad enough to be kicked out, but I'm still freaking out. She still hasn't written me back - I know she's on holiday with her family....I just don't know what to do at this point. I admit I screwed up, but I didn't think it was bad enough to warrant this kind of treatment.
  2. For him to get physical like the way you described is HIGHLY inappropriate. I understand your conundrum though - if you talk to the dept heads about him, there's no guarantee he'll get kicked out (that's actually unlikely) and he may become even more hostile. You should be able to talk confidentially to your adviser about it - do you feel like you can do that? Other than that, I would truly ignore this person. One thing I had to learn - we are not in grad school to make friends. Consider it a professional environment, and focus on yourself and what you have to get done. You have no obligation to discuss grades with this person, or even talk to him at all. I have a few people in my department who are "problem children." At first it bothered me, but eventually I developed an attitude of "I don't care what anyone else thinks of me." You really have to.
  3. Hey all, I'm having a problem with my adviser and I'm really tripping about it. I really like her, we usually get along great. We had a meeting on Wednesday, and I talked to her about the progress I've made on my methodology and other projects. She said the paper I'm working on will be publishable, and everything was fine. On Thursday I gave a practice proposal defense in her class. Admittedly, it wasn't my best performance. I dropped my flash drive somewhere so I had to run to my car right before class and grab my computer, so I was 3 minutes late for class. I didn't explain this to her. By the time I got up to give my presentation, I was so flustered that I forgot everything I had practiced and didn't do the best job of explaining everything. She didn't say anything to me after class. On my way home Thursday, my car started making weird noises. My fiance looked at it and said the brakes were grinding into the rotors and I couldn't drive it until I got it fixed. I live out of town, so I have to have a car to get to class. Friday morning I tried everything - I tried renting a car, but nobody had one on short notice. None of my friends were able to loan me their car for the day. I finally wrote her an email telling her I couldn't make it. I attended my one class by skype, which was fine with the professor. Then I get an email back from my adviser sounding really angry, saying "we need to talk" and that I'm not meeting my coursework responsibilities! It really tripped me out. She also called Enterprise and said they had cars available. I felt like she was basically calling me a liar. I was in tears and wrote her back an email apologizing and trying to explain myself - probably not the best move. I haven't heard anything back from her. I feel like I'm going to spend the whole break tripping out about this. I had terrible nightmares last night and it has been on my mind all day. I didn't know she thought I was behind on my coursework. I admit that I work slower than other students, and I'm a perfectionist so I don't like giving her anything if I feel like it can be better. But I know I am on-track to finish everything by the end of semester. Oh, I also found out that she freaked out on another student that day. I don't know whether to chalk this up to a bad mood, or to truly be worried. Any advice? How can I handle this? I feel really trapped.
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