No, definitely it is not pathetic or anything negative. I totally understand you. Application process changes the mood of people (at least it changes mine:) or at least make a muscle in your finger u use for refresh button..I am a lawyer and I do not have enough information to compare and calculate all those statistics but there is no way we can accurately figure out what is going on during admission processes..I know many people who are relatively more successful than the ones who manage to get in top schools but they have been rejected..every year you can hear such stories of people around you..but there is one thing for sure that the applicants who are granted financial aid are the ones who have solid record of academic accomplishments as well as other success stories or the ones who have made significant contribution to the public service in their home countries or abroad. This is what I have experienced at least. Apply to HKS and wait for the results, you have a chance there but if you do not have a solid record of accomplishment I do not think you have a chance for financial aid. Good luck with the results