Asking to read letters of rec after acceptance?

[genresavvy]

Hi hi! So I was accepted to my MA program of choice this cycle; I knew all of my recommenders very well (took courses with all of them, one was my honors thesis advisor and another my undergrad advisor, with the third being someone I took three courses with and was hugely influential in getting me to pursue graduate studies at all) and know they wrote strong/favorable recommendations.

I of course waived the right to read them during the application process, but now I'm wondering if it's some kind of faux pas to ask to read them? Maybe in the conversation that ensues when I give them the thank-you notes I still need to write? I have a sense they played a huge role in my acceptance (my senior year GPA was just plain bad, there's no getting around it), and I'm incredibly curious as to their tone/what was covered/what traits of mine they emphasized and how well it did or didn't line up with my statement of purpose. 

Thanks in advance!

 

[TakeruK]

It is a HUGE faux pas to ask to read them. Don't do it. Those letters are not meant for you to read and they were written with the expectation that you would never see them.

Unless they offer to show them to you, don't ever mention wanting to see them. 

[rising_star]

Do not ask. I would be so irritated if a student waived their right then later asked me to read it. 

[TeacherTurningSocialWorker]

I agree. Totally understand your curiosity though. I would highly recommend against it. Just take it as a huge compliment and make sure they know how grateful you are

[orange turtle]

On 3/16/2018 at 11:14 AM, genresavvy said:

I have a sense they played a huge role in my acceptance (my senior year GPA was just plain bad, there's no getting around it), and I'm incredibly curious as to their tone/what was covered/what traits of mine they emphasized and how well it did or didn't line up with my statement of purpose. 

I wouldn't ask either but you could thank them for their letter and ask if they would share some insights into your potential, ability, and weaknesses. I would frame it such that you are looking to improve on your weaknesses and also learn to solidify and maintain your strengths.

note to self: should probably try my own advice ?

[TakeruK]

14 minutes ago, orange turtle said:

I wouldn't ask either but you could thank them for their letter and ask if they would share some insights into your potential, ability, and weaknesses. I would frame it such that you are looking to improve on your weaknesses and also learn to solidify and maintain your strengths.

note to self: should probably try my own advice ?

This is a really good idea. You don't even have to link it with the letter because this is a good question to ask no matter what. It might even be a good idea to separate this request from the letter so that it doesn't seem like you are trying to get at the letter's contents (e.g. two separate conversations to thank them for the letter and to ask for advice before embarking on grad school, or thank them for the letter at the beginning, talk about your grad school plans / how excited you are, then ask them for advice). 

I got lots of good advice from asking these things to my undergrad mentor!