Another SOP critique?

[zjwah]

Anyone willing to do a critique of my SOP. I'm applying for MS/PhDs in Epidemiology for Fall 2011. This is the second draft of my SOP (revised after comments from a few helpful posters earlier). Any additional help would be appreciated. It's currently specific to just one school (but the first half can be used for each application). My main questions are regarding length (anywhere I could shorten it- it's under the word count of 1500, but about 2 lines over the 2pg limit) and whether or not it concludes nicely (conclusions were always the hardest for me to write). I'm willing to take a look at anyone else's who wants to swap!

Thanks!

[JessR417]

I'll swap! PM yours over and I will reply with mine!