Looking for an overweight, middle aged, white female?

[Midlyfechrysalis]

No, that's not a Craig's List personal ad.

I graduated in December with my Masters in Counseling, Summa Cum Laude. I am a High School Teacher (including teaching Psychology), have been published, was a guest lecturer. I "think" the only thing wrong with my applications is my quantitative GRE score. I'd like to think it's explainable and superfluous. Explainable because I took the GRE "cold" after a 25 year gap in formal education. Superfluous because I have a 3.97 with a Master's Degree in a related field.

But, honestly, when I look at the websites, I don't see overweight middle aged women.

I am geographically anchored (divorced, co parenting 3 teens) and could only apply to the school I can commute to. If I wait until my kids are out of high school, I'd be over 50 before starting my Ph. D. I'd rather be just over 50 *getting* it.

I'm keeping up with the results postings. One of my schools has nothing posted. 2 others have some info, but I have neither rejection letters nor interviews.

[koolherc]

yeah, there's ageism in the graduate process for sure. public schools tend to be less discriminatory

but you also havent mentioned what kind of programs you applied to and what kinds of schools. the GRE may or may not have mattered.

not sure how your weight figures in, tbh

obviously gender matters, but not race separate from culture

[Midlyfechrysalis]

yeah, there's ageism in the graduate process for sure. public schools tend to be less discriminatory

but you also havent mentioned what kind of programs you applied to and what kinds of schools. the GRE may or may not have mattered.

not sure how your weight figures in, tbh

obviously gender matters, but not race separate

from culture

The weight was an attempt to be funny. It's true, but I don't think you can tell I'm overweight by my CV.

I'm applying to clinical psych programs commutable from Houston. I'm not in a life situation to be more selective in terms of "fit".

Thanks for replying!

[hope4fall2012]

It's true, but I don't think you can tell I'm overweight by my CV.

I think you'll have to try really hard to get your resume to say that you are over weight.. .. LOL

All the best!! This waiting period is such a b***h..

Edited February 9, 2012 by hope4fall2012

[emmm]

Some programs are willing to overlook age (I'm guessing I'm about your age). I'm sure other programs couldn't see past it -- in fact one professor basically told me she thought I was insane. However, there were other "issues" with my applications, so it might not have been just due to age. I did my best to show that I could still keep up academically, but I lacked some of the expected credientials. I also have 3 kids, though one's past teen, and needed to stay local, so there weren't many schools I could apply to. I feel very lucky things worked out, and I feel that I got in to the program I was meant to join.

Good luck finding the right program!

[UnlikelyGrad]

How long has it been since you got your Master's degree? Taking some classes right before I applied helped adcomms see I was still up to academics, even though I was "old."

[tauren]

I just wanted to note that 'fit' is an essential component to the application process because you can get into a program and hate the research, collegiality/people, and/or clinical experiences. Just be careful in terms of those things.

[Midlyfechrysalis]

How long has it been since you got your Master's degree? Taking some classes right before I applied helped adcomms see I was still up to academics, even though I was "old."

December 10, 2011.

[Midlyfechrysalis]

I just wanted to note that 'fit' is an essential component to the application process because you can get into a program and hate the research, collegiality/people, and/or clinical experiences. Just be careful in terms of those things.

Yes, I understand your concern. But "fit" had to take a back seat to reality in my case; one of the complications of the middle aged reality of life and history.

[bythesea]

No, that's not a Craig's List personal ad.

But, honestly, when I look at the websites, I don't see overweight middle aged women.

I am geographically anchored (divorced, co parenting 3 teens) and could only apply to the school I can commute to. If I wait until my kids are out of high school, I'd be over 50 before starting my Ph. D. I'd rather be just over 50 *getting* it.

I'm keeping up with the results postings. One of my schools has nothing posted. 2 others have some info, but I have neither rejection letters nor interviews.

Kudos to you, midlyfechrysalis, for following a dream, no matter your age!

I think I know what you mean about the 'overweight' - maybe it's not really about the weight, but more about how hard it is to be confident when it seems that everyone else is part of the young, beautiful, superstar crowd. And that's all you other GradCafe-ers, right?

If it's any help, I'm probably about your age with teenage kids too, but applying to programs a whole lot less competitive than clinical psych. I don't think I'll be admitted this year, but I've focused on improvements for next year, especially with regards to gaining more research experience.

Also, I know results from three of my schools, even though there hasn't been any official notice, just from emailing the graduate schools. They were all very prompt in responding and gave helpful comments, even though I wasn't accepted. If you've seen postings, it doesn't hurt to email the departments.

Hang in there & good luck!

[bythesea]

Some programs are willing to overlook age (I'm guessing I'm about your age). I'm sure other programs couldn't see past it -- in fact one professor basically told me she thought I was insane.

emm, how did you find out how much programs consider the age factor? by asking the POIs? or the graduate admissions office?

I wasn't sure about asking about age considerations when I applied because I was wondering if it's technically illegal to exclude by age - don't know if the 'federally protected categories' applies here or only to employment.

[CarlieE]

Yes, I understand your concern. But "fit" had to take a back seat to reality in my case; one of the complications of the middle aged reality of life and history.

I know this doesn't pertain necessarily to your field.. but in mine (anthropology) "the fit" and things like geographic location etc can make a huge difference. We have to do overseas field research (generally) or even if it is locally done the field research can take years and is often not predictable - and so if there are kids, families and spouses to be mindful of, the chances of a PhD candidate with these social/familial attachments of completing the program might be significantly reduced. Not saying that it can't be done; it does depend on the individual, the flexibility of the spouse and the children.. It's not that the commitment of the student is lacking but that there ARE other commitments which have to be honored too..

In the program I'll be in the uni is making a $100-200K investment in me; and so, if I drop out half way that's a big investment that has turned into a flop. it might seem unfair but that is how many unis have to see things.

Also, just a side note of how this might actually work... A coordinator in our international office said that an older student with 2 kids had applied and gotten a really prestigious and MASSIVE fellowship overseas and the student moved there with her kids, but then 2 months into it she returned to the US and said that she thought she could have done it, apologized and said she "just couldn't make it work" because her kids hated living there.

On the one hand that is totally understandable - as a mother she had to take into account the feelings and well being of her kids - but at the same time that meant that the fellowship for that year was "wasted". I'm not sure if they offered the remainder of what she had not yet spent to the runner-up candidate, but as I understood it, the incident riled up some inter-university politics and the other candidates and the student's professors were really disappointed.

Again, I think this is field specific and is not true for all programs..

[tauren]

I know this doesn't pertain necessarily to your field.. but in mine (anthropology) "the fit" and things like geographic location etc can make a huge difference. We have to do overseas field research (generally) or even if it is locally done the field research can take years and is often not predictable - and so if there are kids, families and spouses to be mindful of, the chances of a PhD candidate with these social/familial attachments of completing the program might be significantly reduced. Not saying that it can't be done; it does depend on the individual, the flexibility of the spouse and the children.. It's not that the commitment of the student is lacking but that there ARE other commitments which have to be honored too..

In the program I'll be in the uni is making a $100-200K investment in me; and so, if I drop out half way that's a big investment that has turned into a flop. it might seem unfair but that is how many unis have to see things.

Also, just a side note of how this might actually work... A coordinator in our international office said that an older student with 2 kids had applied and gotten a really prestigious and MASSIVE fellowship overseas and the student moved there with her kids, but then 2 months into it she returned to the US and said that she thought she could have done it, apologized and said she "just couldn't make it work" because her kids hated living there.

On the one hand that is totally understandable - as a mother she had to take into account the feelings and well being of her kids - but at the same time that meant that the fellowship for that year was "wasted". I'm not sure if they offered the remainder of what she had not yet spent to the runner-up candidate, but as I understood it, the incident riled up some inter-university politics and the other candidates and the student's professors were really disappointed.

Again, I think this is field specific and is not true for all programs..

This applies to the OP's field, psych. Which is why I brought up 'fit' because people get rejected from lack of fit alone (e.g. too vague of research interests, willingness to work with ANY professor).If faculty and grad students perceive that the applicant,during interviews, is giving out the vibe that 'any program or POI will do as long as it's in the area' they get rejected. It shows a lack of commitment to the faculty and grad students. I've been the interviewer, and will be again next weekend, and they are the first that get cut.

[watson]

Part of this depends on your goal and the school's focus. I'm in an experimental area of psych, but our clinical area is also very much research-oriented (we say we're training researchers who can do clinical work, but not training full-time therapists). If your goal is to go a research/academic/professor route (or if that is the focus of the program, even in clinical), then yes, your age could very well play a huge factor here. The reason is that they figure that 1. it may take you longer to graduate with those other responsibilities, 2. the time/money they put into you may not pay off as much as someone who has 50 years left in the field after finishing the PhD. However, if your goal is to be a practitioner (and that is the focus of your programs) then your age will play a significantly smaller role in the admission process (my undergrad was practitioner-focused, and there was at least one person >40 and they said before I came there was another person >50).