Upcoming Visit Advice...

[lexicana]

Smile mysteriously and say "don't fret, you are my first choice" ? That's probably how I'd handle it haha

Thanks for the advice. It actually IS my first choice so I would certaintly not be stretching the truth.

[verdalantreas]

I'm about to go on a visit as well. Am a bit nervous about meeting with my POI as I haven't had any contact with him yet (been shy), and it seems a bit late to do that now.

Ty for all the advice on the questions and such.

Will let everyone know how it went.

Edited March 4, 2012 by verdalantreas

[FertMigMort]

I'm about to go on a visit as well. Am a bit nervous about meeting with my POI as I haven't had any contact with him yet (been shy), and it seems a bit late to do that now.

Ty for all the advice on the questions and such.

Will let everyone know how it went.

Good luck verdalantreas! I'm sure things will go fine.

[abc123xtc]

The advice on this thread has been incredibly helpful. I am definitely taking note for my visit next week.

[MoreCoffee]

For those of you who've already had a recruitment weekend, what was the dress code? I'm trying to pack! Eek!

[Darth.Vegan]

For those of you who've already had a recruitment weekend, what was the dress code? I'm trying to pack! Eek!

I think business casual is best, but what do I know.

[quantitative]

Dress like you're going to a decent office job where you need to wear a nice dress/skirt/pants + nice top. Don't go too dressy, but look put together. Also, if you have a chance to spend time with grad students outside of the visit out/at a restaurant---go. They will answer more honestly and you'll enjoy the visit more.

Caveat: don't get drunk and make an ass of yourself.

Edited March 7, 2012 by quantitative

[splitends]

Email the schools you're visiting to ask about dress code-- I've gotten radically different interpretations of what is "casual" from people in different departments.

[MoreCoffee]

Thanks all! Yea, I understand that "casual" on the West Coast is different than "casual" on the East Coast. And, oh, the weather......

[jenjenjen]

Yeah i would try and get in contact with a grad student at the school you are visiting, if possible. I would say I was "overdressed" at my last visit to UW - and i was wearing a value village sweater dress, leggings, and low heeled ankle boots. The next day i wore grey boot cut corduroys, red shoes, and a (niceish) white t-shirt and I felt more on standard. I think slacks or serious heels would have been out of place at this visit, but it may well vary from school to school. Generally it seemed like there were far more grad students in jeans than prospective students in jeans...

[RefurbedScientist]

For those of you who've already had a recruitment weekend, what was the dress code? I'm trying to pack! Eek!

I've been to thee open houses so far: In New York, the South, and the West Coast, so I've pretty much covered the "fashion spectrum" of the country. I'm a man and have worn a reasonably nice button down, khakis, and simple dress shoes (i.e. the brown leather shoes I wear to work). At no point did I wear a tie or sports coat. I was at each event on the average- to better-dressed side of the curve. At no point did I feel over-dressed, but I am generally comfortable in business casual because it's what I wear everyday to work. At the same time, I never once felt underdressed. If you elect to wear a skirt or dress, then I expect that a modest business casual outfit is appropriate. I've also seen women wearing khakis with a blouse/shirt or sweater. I personally would not wear jeans or sneakers. Nor would I personally wear a tie or sports coat. Most of your time will be spent in the department among profs and grad students. Professors can run the gamut, but I think I've only seen one ever wear a tie. Grad students typically range from polo shirt and khakis to jeans and sneakers.

At social events with grad students, feel free to loosen up and dress down a bit. But like has been said elsewhere, you're more likely to be "noticed" (not in a good way) for being way too dressy or being too underdressed. Better to just always play to the middle.

[splitends]

I've had programs recommend everything from jeans and sneakers ("nobody will care at all what you're wearing-- they dress pretty terribly around here") to dressing "casually" in slacks and a nice top, and there has been no really discernable pattern between East Coast/West Coast or even private/public.

Also, sidenote: I've heard of a professor at one top university referring to khakis as "jackass pants." Made me laugh.

Different departments have really different norms. Dressing toward the middle is probably good advice, but I know I will probably lean casual unless a department tells me that they expect otherwise. I still feel a little like I'm dressing up in my parent's clothes when in business casual...

[quantitative]

I still feel a little like I'm dressing up in my parent's clothes when in business casual...

Spiltends, agreed! For my job, I need to dress "business casual" although I find it just not looking good on most people. For my last visit, I went with something that was more me: nice jeans + nice shoes + blazer. The other students were dressed in your typical ill-fitted "business casual" clothes. Advice: Girls, just get a nice looking blazer, not the $10 one you see at the store. A good blazer seriously makes your outfit look more x1000 more polished than a cheap one and it will last longer. I think one of the reasons I've never liked business casual is that for those of us who are younger and can't afford quality business casual clothes, we end up buying these spandex-y tops that never flatter too much--and these blazers that just cut wrong.

I felt kind of underdressed since I wasn't wearing a blazer/slacks/work top. I'm very good at pulling off "polished casual" as I call it, but the second I can't wear my jeans... I start feeling uncomfortable in what I'm wearing.

btw guys, I suggest wearing something nice (in your view!) the first day--however, it seemed like the second day-jeans were fine.

Edited March 7, 2012 by quantitative

[FertMigMort]

At social events with grad students, feel free to loosen up and dress down a bit. But like has been said elsewhere, you're more likely to be "noticed" (not in a good way) for being way too dressy or being too underdressed. Better to just always play to the middle.

It's true. We still talk about the guy who wore a blazer and tie from 3 years ago. Not in a mean way, but just in a "where did he get that idea" kind of way.

I'd say dressy jeans (dark wash) are just fine. That was fine 4 years ago at my open houses.

btw guys, I suggest wearing something nice (in your view!) the first day--however, it seemed like the second day-jeans were fine.

This is a pretty safe rule too if you're worried about being underdressed. As a rule though, current students tend to remember the overdressed, not the underdressed.

Edited March 7, 2012 by FertMigMort

[melusine860]

For people attending UW-Madison's Visit Day, I got the following reply from Mary, the Graduate Coordinator re: my question about what the dress code would be:

"We don’t really have one. The most important thing is to be comfortable. Then, probably pick something a little nicer than every day wear. We don’t dress up, no heels or anything like that. It’s definitely casual. And dress for yourself, not us. Hope that helps."

[socscholar]

For people attending UW-Madison's Visit Day, I got the following reply from Mary, the Graduate Coordinator re: my question about what the dress code would be:

"We don’t really have one. The most important thing is to be comfortable. Then, probably pick something a little nicer than every day wear. We don’t dress up, no heels or anything like that. It’s definitely casual. And dress for yourself, not us. Hope that helps."

Thanks!

[RefurbedScientist]

Also, sidenote: I've heard of a professor at one top university referring to khakis as "jackass pants." Made me laugh.

Different departments have really different norms. Dressing toward the middle is probably good advice, but I know I will probably lean casual unless a department tells me that they expect otherwise. I still feel a little like I'm dressing up in my parent's clothes when in business casual...

I hope this prof wasn't at a school I'm visting

My problem is that once I entered the working world and needed business casual clothing, my entire wardrobe has pretty much shifted to khakis and button down shirts. I don't have presentable casual clothing (e.g. I don't even own a pair of jeans). I pretty much have old retired chinos that are all paint stained, a pair of ripped up dirty sneakers, and grimy white-Ts. That's my weekend uniform. When I'm at work (which is honestly more than I'd like to admit) or out at night, I just wear nicer stuff because it's all I have. Then again, I'm far from fashion-forward. I've never been able to pull off the "jeans and a blazer" look. I wish I could, but I'm just too nerdy. This is why I'm going into this line of work: I can barely survive on the outside!

But yeah, I would echo that grad students are always on the lookout for pretension. Obviously you're not visiting a school to impress your future friends, but you do want to come off as an approachable and friendly person. I think when we're surrounded by such smart people, there is a bit of collective social control to keep the snobbiness at a minimum. Wearing a blazer emblazoned with your university seal or a tie from J. Press will probably come off as pretentious, even if your intentions are good.

In the same vein, humility is always a good attribute at these things. You're in, so there's no need to impress anyone. That being said, I am, by nature, the kind of person who likes to participate, ask a lot of questions, raise my hand, etc. If you are like me and tend to be an over-eager student, be conscious of this and keep your comments brief. Don't wax theoretical about Husserl at the departmental colloquium. At the same time, don't be afraid to ask relevant questions. It's just better to ask some things in private. You will have ample opportunity to speak to profs and students in private or small groups, either at meals or receptions or over email. Never never compare the program you're visiting to other programs you've seen in public conversation. If you come to trust an individual and the rapport is there, then it's fine to compare notes about schools in private. That goes for grad students and other prospectives.

[sociology27]

I don't understand this stigma/fear of comparing other schools. I probably had that conversation with everyone I met and I don't think anybody was offended. I mean they don't think that we only applied there and we don't think that they're the only school we could go to. So why not just come out and talk about other programs, comparing the fairly obvious strengths and draws? I find that when you're just straight with people, profs and grad. students, nobody gets offended. It's only when people try to beat around the bushes that they come off a little suspicious.

Just be Real!

But that's just my take.

[RefurbedScientist]

I don't understand this stigma/fear of comparing other schools. I probably had that conversation with everyone I met and I don't think anybody was offended. I mean they don't think that we only applied there and we don't think that they're the only school we could go to. So why not just come out and talk about other programs, comparing the fairly obvious strengths and draws? I find that when you're just straight with people, profs and grad. students, nobody gets offended. It's only when people try to beat around the bushes that they come off a little suspicious.

Just be Real!

But that's just my take.

Good point. I think if one is asked, then it makes sense to reply earnestly. I think that, if for example you are sitting in on a panel of faculty talking about their research, then it would be in bad form to say, "When I visited Cooler-than-U., faculty co-authored frequently with students. Do you do that here?" Maybe it goes without saying. I was always made uncomfortable when people asked me where else I was looking. So maybe just out of courtesy for the super-nebbish out there like me, one might not jump right into that line of conversation.

[quantitative]

I don't understand this stigma/fear of comparing other schools. I probably had that conversation with everyone I met and I don't think anybody was offended. I mean they don't think that we only applied there and we don't think that they're the only school we could go to. So why not just come out and talk about other programs, comparing the fairly obvious strengths and draws? I find that when you're just straight with people, profs and grad. students, nobody gets offended. It's only when people try to beat around the bushes that they come off a little suspicious.

Just be Real!

But that's just my take.

I tried to make it clear I had been accepted to/was looking at similar universities as I think disclosure is important. I opted to take the approach to just talk about research/whatever came up instead of my decision. I felt I just had better connections with students and faculty whenever I decided not to disclose what schools specifically I was looking at. I think it helps professors look at you less as an applicant but more as a student in the program. This will result in a better discussion than when they're discussing their view of x school--and trying to sway you. My feeling is that even if you don't end up at that school, you'll be able to cultivate a relationship with an established faculty member who may be able to work with you in the future or help you.

I'm looking at this from a networking standpoint as you would at a professional conference. These are influential people who are willing to talk with you; unless it's a private conversation once trust is established, don't disclose the school. If you feel the need tell simply say: "I'm looking at large/medium/small public/private school that is very good in (specialty)--very similar to your school." One professor actually complimented me on the fact that I was so tactful about this--and just focused on meeting her/the research/the program. My advice: Talk to grad students/other applicants about other schools (if you must). Be tactful when you're discussing this during the visit. These are your future colleagues; keep that in mind.

I would echo that grad students are always on the lookout for pretension. Obviously you're not visiting a school to impress your future friends, but you do want to come off as an approachable and friendly person. I think when we're surrounded by such smart people, there is a bit of collective social control to keep the snobbiness at a minimum. Wearing a blazer emblazoned with your university seal or a tie from J. Press will probably come off as pretentious, even if your intentions are good.In the same vein, humility is always a good attribute at these things. You're in, so there's no need to impress anyone.

As SocialGroovements says, You're IN. Wearing jeans to your visit won't get your visit rescinded, ha. This isn't an interview--and you want to be approachable. However, don't look SLOPPY as you're meeting professors for the first time. However, you don't need a full suit or even a power skirt/heels. My advice for people unsure about HOW dressy: Dress as you would for a class presentation with your peers. Basically: put together/semi-professional, but not overly dressy.

Edited March 9, 2012 by quantitative

[dizzid]

*chirp chirp*

How are the visits going?

[sciencegirl]

exhausting... I mean, these visits really are draining.. not so much physically, but its a lot of emotional energy. Meeting professors for the first time, potential cohort.. having to give your elevator talk over and over again to everyone you meet... and then trying to decide where I'll be for the next 5-6 years.. I didn't even get into a ton of places either, but the visits I've been on have just wiped me out.. (as you can probably tell by my diminished frequency in posting as of late...)

Edited March 19, 2012 by sciencegirl

[FertMigMort]

exhausting... I mean, these visits really are draining.. not so much physically, but its a lot of emotional energy. Meeting professors for the first time, potential cohort.. having to give your elevator talk over and over again to everyone you meet... and then trying to decide where I'll be for the next 5-6 years.. I didn't even get into a ton of places either, but the visits I've been on have just wiped me out.. (as you can probably tell by my diminished frequency in posting as of late...)

They are super draining. I actually went to a coffeeshop at all of my visits for a few hours one evening and called people at home to decompress and have some "real talk" about how the visits were going. Don't know if that's an option for everyone, but it can't hurt to ask. I also made sure to pack my Xanax (for the more anxious of y'all out there).

[dizzid]

I also made sure to pack my Xanax (for the more anxious of y'all out there).

This made me literally LOL. Thanks.

I go on my first one next week, the schedule the coordinator sent me is pretty intense.

This may seem trivial but Scienegirl what did you wear? Khakis? Dresses? Flats? Studs? Suit and Tie? Bodypaint? WHAT?!?!

[sciencegirl]

@dizzid: dress like a put together graduate student - overdoing it is really annoying.. and underdressing comes off as sloppy and disrespectful. I did notice at the Stanford open house, that most of the women were much more put together and pulled off "the grad student look" better - most seemed to wear a nice sweater/dress shirt combo with jeans or pants.. the guys were a bit more varied -- one guy wore baggy pants and a t-shirt to the faculty presentations (and I think had a baseball cap on for part of the event) which I thought just looked really unprofessional. Comfortable shoes are important too, but not really tennis shoes.. something that looks nice but no heels or stuff that is too dressy - otherwise walking around on the campus tours will be a pain.

Basically, look like a graduate student that is planning on making a presentation in front of a class... like your TA right now.

If you are an introvert like me, schedule time to be by yourself - and recharge away from the group. I forgot about this, but in some ways you are in a fishbowl.. everyone is watching and judging you at all times (I say this because well, its just what people do in first time meet group situations).. and its nice to just get away for a tiny bit to decompress.