Contacting former students

[lotuspetal7]

Is it too weird to contact past students just to ask how they're doing? I had a few students who stayed with me the whole academic year, who were my little fan club and got to feel almost like friends at the time. A couple of them friended me on Facebook later, but I have no way to keep up with the others. They were all lovely people and I miss them and care about how they are doing, but I should have no reason to run into them again. They took my class to satisfy a general requirement unrelated to their majors, so I won't be running into them in the department.

 

I suppose I should not do any Facebook friending myself. (until maybe years later when one or both of us is no longer at this school?) Can I send them an email? Or is that just weird?

 

I knew this part of TA-ing would be hard for me   I used to teach little kids and it would break my heart to realize that in a couple of years they wouldn't remember I had ever existed...

[MsDarjeeling]

I think for this very circumstance many of my professors have waited until the last day and said that if any of us wanted to keep in touch regarding their projects or whatever to leave our emails to be added to their list.  Then a few times a year we'd get an email with their news and could reply sharing whatever we desired.  I don't see any reason a TA couldn't do something similar. 

 

Since some of your students contacted you on facebook I see nothing wrong with you reaching out to them, asking how they're doing, and letting them know you're happy to advise/support them however you can.  For those that didn't do that and didn't provide you with their email I'd say you'll just have to hope they're doing well because it would be odd for you to reach out to them now. 

[lotuspetal7]

Thank you for the response MsDarjeeling. As far as "those who didn't provide you with their email," though, even a student who might want the possibility of staying in touch with me in the future (to get a letter or whatever) wouldn't have felt the need to exchange email addresses with me because we already have each others' emails; I used to send them emails all the time about class stuff. But to use it now would be weird, I guess... What about an email to the whole group of my regulars, who all knew each other? Is that still weird?

 

What a good idea about the list thing--I should try that in the future.

Edited August 4, 2013 by lotuspetal7

[MsDarjeeling]

I guess I'm looking at this from a student perspective.  As a student, if months later a TA emailed me just to say hi and see how I was doing as part of a mass email to the class I'd think it was odd.  I get that they may have my email from when I was in their class, but if I didn't say sure contact me anytime or whatever I'd think it was weird and wonder why they didn't have other things to occupy their time lol. 

 

Considering all the students have your contact info from the class and could reach out to you at any time for a LOR or just to chat or whatever I think the burden is on them.  I don't think it is necessary for you to reach out to say that you're available to them.  If any of them wanted to get in touch they would have or they will in the future.  Many of them may not do that simply because they don't want to and you'll just have to accept not having any updates about them.  If you want you could tell the students you are in touch with to feel free to let the other students know they can contact you at any time, but I still think you should leave it up to the students to make the connection.

[lotuspetal7]

OK thanks, that makes sense. I appreciate it.

[St Andrews Lynx]

I add former work colleagues on LinkedIn, rather than Facebook. They don't necessarily count as my "friends" (nor do I want to share a lot of personal information with them), but I do want to keep in touch and see what they're up to somehow. That might be an alternative method for you to try with your students...

[lotuspetal7]

That is an idea, thanks!