"What if" questions

[Mr. Wizard]

Anyone afraid of getting disappointed after been accepted? It might seem irrational to think about that at this point, but I'm freaking out with thousands of "what if" questions, worst of which is "what if I evantually find out that the program is not for me?". Any comforting words? Please?

[manduke]

I've gone through law school and worked as an attorney, only to realize after a few years that it wasn't for me. You can never know for sure that you will like what you're doing until you're actually doing it. If it turns out you don't, well, you can still switch gears. It just takes a little more effort because of the inertia of the career path you've been on. If you don't like the program, you'll be able to figure out the best way forward with a little soul searching, some extra effort, and a willingness to bear the transition costs (money, time). And even dead end career paths or programs can still improve your resume and set you apart from other job candidates or applicants for other programs if you use that background to your advantage.

[Guest Gnome Chomsky]

It's called life. You make decisions and follow through on those decisions. Many of them turn out to be bad decisions and many good. That's how the game of life works. You've obviously already made the decision to apply to grad school and you've went through the entire excruciating process. No sense backing out now. In my opinion, the worst way to live life is by overanalyzing every decision. Of course, don't make uninformed decisions. But once you'vemade one, stick to it and see how it plays out. Striking out is inevitable, but never taking a swing is tragic.

[lbp2488]

If you're a particularly anxious person, I think there are bound to be "what if I'm making a mistake" questions popping up regarding pretty much any major life decision... and often the minor ones, too. Those types of thoughts are normal and they don't actually mean anything. Like the others have said - all we can do is weigh our options, make whatever is the best decision based on the information we have, and trudge onward in spite of the what-if voices that chime in along the way.

[Maleficent999]

I'm not at all religious but I do believe that things tend to work out in the long run so long as you make decisions that you legitimately feel are the best at the time, even if they turn out to be bad decisions in the short term. If you get to grad school and hate it, then you know it wasn't for you but at least you tried and then you'll know. It might take you a year or two to get back into the momentum of your life but you might find that going to grad school, although it made your life difficult when you had to rearrange everything when you decided you didn't like it, ended up being a good thing because of whatever trajectory it put you on. Or you might get there and it is exactly what you think it is and you'll love it. Just know that if you're true to yourself, things will work out some way somehow. That's my best advice.

Edited January 16, 2014 by Maleficent999

[Mr. Wizard]

Thanks, guys! Your answers really helped me to calm down. I just hope that all this "phD odyssey" won't end in an embarrassing and gloomy fashion. You never know what the future might bring, though.

[teacherplease]

I understand your fears, but at the end of the day, it's not like a Ph.D. or masters degree can hurt your chances of doing something else, even if it's in a completely different field. People will just think you're one of those people who wants to understand the world from all its angles, and that's never a bad thing. 

 

Keep in there! I'm freaking out about admissions too, just hoping I get in somewhere.

 

Grad school isn't a lifetime commitment. I might think that this is EXACTLY what I want to do with the rest of my life, but ten years down the road I might change my mind. We're still young. If you love it now, do it. Leave your future problems to your future self. 

[Maleficent999]

Enjoy the ride. What's life without a little bit of calculated risk? <--a line stolen from one of my GRE essays lol

[Mr. Wizard]

Sigh, I wish I could think that way. I'm so anxious that I've been about to give up too many times. I'm afraid I'll give it up before even try and then destroy my life chance only because I was trying to protect my life from being destroyed. Paradox of an extremely neurotic student.