Declining Admission Offers

[YaBoyAR]

To those still waiting to hear from schools, I mean no disrespect or insensitivity toward you with the following:

So, there are some schools that I have been accepted to that I can say with certainty I will not be attending. There's no need to keep them in my pocket. Others might be on a wait list or awaiting acceptance, etc. I'd like to let those schools know as soon as I comfortably can.

So what do we say? There's the obvious, "thank you. I love your school. I hate having to decline. It's not you - it's me" jargon. But even though I know I won't be attending their school, I'm not sure exactly which ones I will be. What should we say with regard to that information? Do we give them reasons? Do they care?

Any input would be greatly appreciated.

[Poncho]

I don't think you'll necessarily need to give them the exact details of the why you are choosing not to accept their offer.  I think you had it right by saying, "Thank you, but I will not be attending in the Fall due to other opportunities."  If they really want to follow up for more details they will do so.  

But I'm in the same boat as you applying for Fall 2014, so this is just my two cents.

[MetalChemEnthusiast]

Last time I went through the admission process, when I informed other schools about my decision, I kept it short and simple. I also made sure they know that I am very grateful for the consideration and the offer. 

 

As far as reason goes, I never gave mine and nobody ever asked. I think unless a school really really wants you, they will follow up and see if there's anything they can do to get you to reconsider.

 

I have also talked to a few admission coordinators about things like this and a lot of people don't even say anything. The department have to wait till April 16th to assume safely that people declined their offers. I think what you're doing will be really appreciated by everybody

 

Congrats on all your acceptances!

[TakeruK]

Yes, what you are doing is a great and helpful thing to everyone involved! Good on you!

 

Keep your decline email very short (like 3 sentences) and polite. Do not give any reasons. Also, don't be "patronizing" or make it sound like you feel bad that they will feel bad that you didn't take their offer. It might be true, but it might also not be true--they have tons of students saying no (and will probably get lots of others that say yes too), so don't make a big deal out of it

 

In all of my programs, the Graduate School (not the department) will send you an "exit survey" a few days after they get official notice of your decision and that survey will generally ask you for the reasons and where you did end up going. You can wait until you have your final decision before completing these surveys.

[YaBoyAR]

Thanks for the advice everyone. I think you're all spot on. I went ahead and made some emails. Still feels a little sad though. It's surprisingly unnerving even though you know you don't want to go there. Hopefully someone who is waiting on Purdue, Washington, or Emory will get my spot!

[Alchemist921]

So far based on my acceptances I think I will wait until April to decide. But I do agree that if there's a definite no then letting them know early will help others that are waiting.

[Chemcki]

Well use my undergrad PI's answer, "why did you apply for those schools in the first place?" If you obviously would not consider them. From my previous experience, those schools would not be so interested in hearing your reasons, "just say I am sorry, I have accepted another offer. " They will want to hang up the phone sooner than you think. 

[Eigen]

Neither of the schools I turned down took it particularly well. Both tried to argue the point with me. 

 

I would personally e-mail, and specifically e-mail not just the department coordinator, but the PIs you had a relationship with, if you had any of those. 

 

But yeah, there's definitely the question for future applicants to ask themselves: Why apply to schools you will not have an interest in attending. 

 

I encourage all of the undergrads from my department to apply selectively, to schools that they are sure they'd want to go to if they got in. It makes the choice hard come March or April, but it saves time and stress in the long run. 

[YaBoyAR]

Neither of the schools I turned down took it particularly well. Both tried to argue the point with me. 

 

I would personally e-mail, and specifically e-mail not just the department coordinator, but the PIs you had a relationship with, if you had any of those. 

 

But yeah, there's definitely the question for future applicants to ask themselves: Why apply to schools you will not have an interest in attending. 

 

I encourage all of the undergrads from my department to apply selectively, to schools that they are sure they'd want to go to if they got in. It makes the choice hard come March or April, but it saves time and stress in the long run. 

So far, I've contacted 3 schools and all of them responded in kind. Only one asked where I had decided to go instead. They said they liked to know for their own records.

 

It's natural to apply to some "safety" schools as well as some "reach" schools. If you get in to the reaches, the safeties become expendable. It's not that I would never go to those schools and never wanted to in the first place. It's just, I wouldn't go to them over some others.

[St Andrews Lynx]

Well use my undergrad PI's answer, "why did you apply for those schools in the first place?" If you obviously would not consider them. 

Sometimes new information comes up after your application is submitted that makes one school less or more appealing. It is also rare that you will be *equally* excited about attending the 5 schools you applied to: I applied to all the places that I thought *could* work out if I attended them, but when it came to the decisions I knew that some schools would work out better than others (because of funding, location, PI, etc).

 

On the opposite side of that coin - there were schools I wasn't initially excited that about when I submitted my application...but after visiting my opinion changed for the better. So applying to a variety of schools is something I would always recommend.

[asaprocky]

It's still really hard to pull the trigger....

[Chemcki]

I have been there, but it's like telling a girl you think you shouldn't see each other anymore. The longer you wait,the more damage you will do. I think I agree with all your replies, you must be stressful enough deciding where to go in the first place, don't let this get in the way