Getting to a Decision, Extending an Offer

[engineercinc]

Hello,

I know similar situations have been posted before, but I'm in a bind and not sure what to do and hoping for some fresh advice. I have until Wednesday to accept an offer that I'm mildly happy with but I interviewed several weeks ago with my top POI who has kept in contact but says he is waiting on some information before making his admission decisions. We are in the process of setting up a Skype meeting where he can explain to me the timeline however I now only have until Wednesday. I took a risk (I think) and emailed him explaining I need to make a decision about one school by Wednesday but he is out of the country and I'm not feeling hopeful that I will hear from him before then. I'm debating on asking the school that made the offer for an extension but I don't think I will  get one. My questions are:

 

1. Is it wise to ask for an extension or does this look bad? If I ask for an extension is there any chance they would revoke my offer of admission? What reason would I give for asking for an extension

 

2. Any guesses as to why it's taking my POI so long to give me an answer? My guess is waiting on funding but I'm not sure.

 

3. Can I say yes to the offer I have now and then wait to see what my top choice says and change my response to the first school/offer? I really don't want to do this but it would be hard to say no to my top choice.

 

Thanks.

[nugget]

1. Your offer will not be revoked by asking for an extension (unless it is done past your Wednesday deadline, of course). The worst that can happen is that you might get a no. You will need to come up with a reason, though. Is it a fully funded offer? If it isn't or if the money isn't generous perhaps you could say that you need more time to give your final answer because of some financial matters that need to be considered first before you can make a firm decision (the financial matter, of course being taking another offer if it gives you better funding). If it is a generous offer, I think you will need to be honest and say that it is difficult to make this important career decision as you are still waiting on your last school. But remind them that you are extremely interested in their offer and sound excited about it so they know they're not your back up plan.

 

2. Perhaps he is waiting on funding. Perhaps you are an alternate and the other candidate hasn't accepted and there are doubts that this person will accept. Your guess is as good as mine.

 

3. Are these both Canadian schools? Are they 2 different programs in 2 different universities? If you answered yes to both then I believe you could technically do that but do you want to be burning bridges with people in your field? You are bound to meet at conferences in the future as a grad student and it will be clear why you backed out of the offer. If these are US schools, you need to ask an American.

[engineercinc]

Thanks for your response. I think I will send out a request for an extension first thing Monday morning and hopefully by myself a week or two. If they say no then I'll be really stuck. They are both Canadian schools and I was worried about burning bridges with people in the field and definitely don't want to do that, but I also don't want to lose the opportunity to work at my top choice with my top POI. 

[nugget]

I would be extremely surprised if he didn't check his email every day, even while on vacation. People in these sorts of positions normally don't just disappear for a week or two and not check on their emails. Good luck on the request.

[engineercinc]

I got a one week extension. Still no word from the other school though. I emailed the other school to let them know I had a deadline of next week. Hopefully this is OK. The waiting game is painful.