End of term sads

[Tuesdays]

So, I just finished my first year of coursework on a PhD two days ago. Expecting good grades on everything, have established good rapport with my advisers and other faculty members, preparing for field work later in the summer, and starting a part time gig as a research assistant to a faculty member I really admire--should be super exciting, right?!

 

But I've been majorly down in the dumps since I turned in that last final paper. All I want to do is eat, sleep, and zone out.

 

I could probably just do that for a while, except that I really need to get my butt in gear as an RA. Anyone else get in a funk at the end of the year? Suggestions on how to break out of it?

 

I think part of it might be that it's the first moment I've had all year to sit back and think about where I'm at, and mostly what I see is that everything I care about that isn't grad school is going to have to be on hold for a few more years. I've got the "who even am I?" sads.

[Guest Gnome Chomsky]

Are you sad because you're done with school work for the academic year? You have 4-5 more years oh PhD so I'd enjoy the down time. Nothing wrong with lounging around for a few weeks. I graduated from undergrad (after 6 years full-time) exactly 3 weeks ago and I haven't done shit. Well, I kinda have. I stayed in Miami (where I completed undergrad) for 10 days after graduating. Said my final farewells to my friends. Went out for drinks a few times. But for the most part I just sat around, slept in, and watched movies. It was awesome. Then I drove to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, non-stop and settled in my temporary summer dwelling place. The 10 days I've been here I've just been lounging around. I've been spending about 3 hours a day in the sauna. But I did start studying pretty intensely for a placement exam a few days ago. And tomorrow morning I'm gonna start working out hardcore. But I've definitely enjoyed just sitting around and doing nothing. What's not to enjoy? 

[Maleficent999]

This doesn't sound bizarre to me at all. My research interests focus largely around bdsm and the kink scene. When "kinksters" interact in an intense scene, usually a scene between a Dom and sub, the sub can often experience "sub drop". The Dom can experience a drop too but it is less talked about. Stay with me here, when the sub comes down from such an intense high/emotional/extreme place they can very easily fall into a kind of depression. Experienced kinksters know that aftercare is an important part of a D/s scene. Aftercare means both physical, mental, and emotional care so that the drop isn't too intense and damaging. I think you're experiencing a kind of drop like this. Maybe, grad drop? Haha but seriously, you're coming down from a very intense place. It's important you take care of yourself. That might mean taking a few days to process everything and just chill out. It might mean talking to loved ones or doing some fun things you've been missing, maybe all of the above.

Just my $.02. I'm no expert but I definitely don't think what you're feeling is out of bounds.

[lewin]

No need to coin a new term, I think "sub drop" works just fine here. Grad school is definitely a D/s relationship.

 

 

 

OP, take a week off and don't feel guilty about it, then get back to work afterwards. A week of 95% disconnection from work (e.g., save for a few emails) is a lot better than half-slacking for the next two months because you were burnt out.

[ecm07e]

You need that week to recharge your batteries! I have only 17 more days of instruction (teaching 9th and 12th grade English in an inner-city school) and I am counting down the seconds until I can crawl in my bed and sleep for 48 hours straight. The first week off I do absolutely nothing. I just lay in bed and recharge because I am so burnt-out. Then around July 1st (late this year!) I break out of the bedroom and my creative juices are following again and I can start planning for next year. I also do this the week before pre-service because God knows I won't get much sleep that week either. 

[GradHooting]

This doesn't sound bizarre to me at all. My research interests focus largely around bdsm and the kink scene. When "kinksters" interact in an intense scene, usually a scene between a Dom and sub, the sub can often experience "sub drop". The Dom can experience a drop too but it is less talked about. Stay with me here, when the sub comes down from such an intense high/emotional/extreme place they can very easily fall into a kind of depression. Experienced kinksters know that aftercare is an important part of a D/s scene. Aftercare means both physical, mental, and emotional care so that the drop isn't too intense and damaging. I think you're experiencing a kind of drop like this. Maybe, grad drop? Haha but seriously, you're coming down from a very intense place. It's important you take care of yourself. That might mean taking a few days to process everything and just chill out. It might mean talking to loved ones or doing some fun things you've been missing, maybe all of the above.

Just my $.02. I'm no expert but I definitely don't think what you're feeling is out of bounds.

 

That's a fascinating and very apt comparison.  My adviser is keen on keeping me involved in research the moment qualifying exams are over.  Perhaps he anticipates a sort of "drop" in mood after the intense deadlines and adrenaline stop.  OP, perhaps you could find some fun in the topics you are researching, maybe not necessarily immediately related to what you are doing?

 

I know that when my final exams were completely over, I did not feel like preparing for the next phase of work.  So, I sat down and wrote a wave equation solver where you could hear the sounds of different-shaped things as they were bonked.  Completely unrelated to what I was doing, but it was some output for the high strung feelings, like writing it down in a journal or something.  In a sense, writing that program was a journal entry to me, to put my feelings about the work I've done into some tangible form.  Otherwise, I would have crashed too fast from intense study to nothing.  That project served as a sort of cushion to ease me into a different direction.

 

Do you think you could turn the feelings you have into a fun project of some sort?