Two Body Problem?

[madbiochemist]

So, I applied to several graduate programs and am waiting to hear back. In the meantime, I've been a little bit stressed about my significant other trying to find a job in the same city as my school while I'm trying to get my PhD. He has his master's degree in structural engineering and will (hopefully) be working at some sort of firm. Any experience on how to navigate the two body problem?

Specifically:

How did you guys prepare for the unknown while waiting to hear back from graduate schools?

Was it difficult to find a suitable job by August?

What were some challenges you ran into and how could I attempt to prepare for them?

 

 

[rising_star]

This thread might help: 

[TakeruK]

One thing I didn't mention in the other thread was that you and your partner should be prepared for the potential that it might take the other person a longer time than expected to find work in the new place. Depending on the particular demand of their skillset and the job market in your new city, it might not be possible for your partner to find work before you start. 

 

This can be a very stressful time for a relationship. Your relationship is your business and I don't want to tell you what to do, but from our own experience and from seeing others go through the same thing, I think it's a good idea to discuss this possibility early on and talk about what solutions you both would want or not want. For example, would you be okay with a long distance relationship until they find work in the same place? Would you be okay with moving there anyways and looking for work later? If he doesn't find work right away, how will you both deal with it? How long would you both be willing for him to find work in his field before he starts looking for work in other places? I think discussing these expectations, worries, and contingencies beforehand can really be helpful.

 

If you want some numbers, my spouse did not get meaningful work until 8 months after moving with me (we had enough reserves to live on my stipend alone for a year), but part of the wait was because we're Canadian (4 months extra for authorization). Some of our friends' significant others found work within 3 months, and others took almost a year, and still others did not ever find any work and had to move elsewhere. Maybe it's just the market where we live, but so far, no one we know had SOs that prior to moving to school here. Definitely hope for the best, but being prepared for that possibility might help make the transition smoother. 

[madbiochemist]

This thread might help: 

Thanks for the link to the thread and the suggestions, guys. I'll keep all of that in mind as the process continues...

[random17]

If you want some numbers, my spouse did not get meaningful work until 8 months after moving with me (we had enough reserves to live on my stipend alone for a year), but part of the wait was because we're Canadian (4 months extra for authorization). Some of our friends' significant others found work within 3 months, and others took almost a year, and still others did not ever find any work and had to move elsewhere. Maybe it's just the market where we live, but so far, no one we know had SOs that prior to moving to school here. Definitely hope for the best, but being prepared for that possibility might help make the transition smoother. 

 

To add more anecdata, we moved for my PhD program in September 2012 and my spouse has still yet to get a permanent full-time job in her field. We knew this was a possibility before we moved, but underestimated exactly how important certain factors were (namely not being Canadian). In our case, we decided before we moved here that living together was our first priority and we had a contingency plan, so it's working out fine, if not our ideal situation, but I completely agree that it is very important to discuss all these possibilities before you start!

[sjoh197]

We are dealing with the same situation....

 

One thing to keep in mind is whether you factored in a significant others job potential into your applications? I found one or two programs that I thought I would like, but the job market potential for my SO was zero. So I counted them a loss.Just a thought

[FinallyAccepted]

My SO felt confident enough that with his degree type and experience that he could probably find a job wherever. So the limiting factor for moving would probably be me and where I would actually get accepted, so I applied to all good fits, spread around the country. We know there's the possibility of living apart temporarily while he works to sell our house or find a job if both don't happen very quickly and I have to go ahead and move for school. It's not the most comforting thought, but we knew this would involve sacrifices.

[braindump]

I'm going through the same thing right now with my SO, but he has an extra fall semester before he graduates so he won't be moving out to join me until spring, which gives him a little extra time to plan/prepare. When I was applying, I mostly stuck to larger cities where jobs are more abundant, and particularly high-tech areas (he's comp sci engineering, I'm BME). This meant I passed up on applying to some good schools because they were in the middle of nowhere, but I'm okay with that. Now that decisions are starting to come in I'm having him do some research on the areas I get accepted to, to see what the job prospects are for him there. Yeah, I might end up passing on a slightly better program in favor of a better location, but you have to try to find a balance to satisfy both of you. And chances are, since I plan on going into industry after I graduate, many of the places that have better career options for him will likely have better career options for me, as well.

 

All in all, the process is a bit of a gamble, and the only thing you can do is try to prepare as best you can for all the possibilities.