Did I make a mistake during my visit?

[mseph]

I recently visited university A. I had some connection with one of current students there, so we had good conversation, and he asked me what other offers I am considering besides A. I told him my other options, and when I told him that I got an offer from university B, he recommended to talk to one of the professors who worked at university B in the past but now at A. I pondered on telling the professor about this, but decided to follow the suggestion. When I told the professor during my individual meeting, she gave me good advice on both departments based on her experience, but later asked me if I could send the admissions letter from B. She said if B's funding offer is higher, then they will try to make it more or less equivalent, so that can help me decide better. 

 

There are some points I am concerned about:

First, I am very pleasantly surprised by A's enthusiasm to have me. But now I am worried if I acted wrong by talking about my acceptance from B with a professor who is currently at A. 

Second, should I still email the professor my admissions letter when I am not sure where to attend? I told her I would, but what I am worried about is that if they do raise their funding (B offered better funding package indeed), then do I have to accept A's offer? I've heard cases where students negotiate on their funding, but this was not my intention. And I think the general suggestion in negotiating the offer is only when you are sure you will attend the program. If department raises your funding, that means you are expected to accept their offer. For my case, though, I am not sure which school I will end up choosing, and I did not mean to negotiate on my funding package. 

 

Was it a mistake? Should I still send my acceptance letter from B to A and see what happens? 

 

(I am really not sure where this post should go. I thought about where to post for like an hour, and this seemed most appropriate place. But if not, please let me know. I will ask my post to be moved.)

[MathCat]

No, you didn't do anything wrong, and no, telling them what you were offered there does not commit you to accepting their offer if they do bump it up. It just means the want you! They asked, not you. If you had asked them to increase your funding by saying you'd attend if they did, that would be different. It does not sound like that is the case, so don't stress out about it.

[MOR_embryo]

Funding is a really minor role in making a life decision like this and they would understand if you don't accept.

at least that's my take.

The type of research you do, school name, and your own personal preference are reasons enough to decline a program. If they offer you funding and it's still not enough for you to go, then it's not the program for you.

I don't think I would go to some programs if they doubled stipend.

[TakeruK]

It sounds like you did everything right actually. This is exactly what I would have recommend you to do if you told me the details ahead of time and asked for advice.

[rising_star]

What MathCat said. Send A the offer letter from B. If they want to make a higher offer, they will and you are under no obligation to accept it.

 

FWIW, it's pretty common for prospectives to be asked about and share where else they have been admitted. If you work in a niche area, then it's often pretty obvious to all those involved.