Withdrawing after April 15- is there a good way to do it?

[MidwesternAloha]

Yes, I understand the consequences.

No, I did not hold on to/accept an offer "just in case" 

Yes, I fully committed to a program with an April 15th deadline

 

My life situation has changed and I need to withdraw from a program.  Is there a right way to do it?  What do you say and who do you speak to?  Any help would be appreciated.

[Between Fields]

You could ask for a deferment, if your life circumstances are temporary.

[MidwesternAloha]

You could ask for a deferment, if your life circumstances are temporary.

 

Unfortunately, permanent.  

[brown_eyed_girl]

I think you should just email your POI and the DGS as soon as possible explaining the situation and expressing your regret at not being able to attend. Luckily it's not too far after the deadline, and they could probably still accept someone else if they are looking to fill your spot. A sudden change in life circumstances is unavoidable, so I don't think you should feel bad; just be honest and direct. I certainly hope your situation has changed for the better, and I'm sorry you won't be able to attend regardless! Wishing you the best and hoping all is okay with you. 

[grindian]

Just be honest. You can't help it, so don't worry about it.

[MidwesternAloha]

Honesty appeared to be the best policy.  After a long, uncomfortable conversation, they were obviously frustrated (rightfully so) and did their best to accommodate my situation.  Thank you to all who responded.

[niketon]

What did you tell them?

[MidwesternAloha]

What did you tell them?

It went totally not according to plan. I called the department of Graduate Studies to ask how to proceed. They gave me directions but followed up with an email, cc'ing my program. The program coordinator instantly responded with severe concern, and I explained my personal situation. She asked me to let her know ASAP what I was doing. This occurred around 4:00 pm so I slept on it. The next morning, she reached out to me again, stating that the program head "needed a decision." I composed a formal/business letter stating my gratitude for the acceptance, reason for withdrawing, and wished that if the course of events dictate, we may meet again on pleasant terms. I cc'd the graduate studies department and he was the only person to confirm receipt of the message. I haven't heard from them since. I hope someone on the waitlist was able to receive my spot.