who would like to rip apart my SOP?

[southerntransplant]

I'm on my 2nd draft of my SOP. My first one was horrible and now this one, although much more concise i'm just not sure about it. I haven't included any personality traits--because I'm not sure if i should? Should I acknowledge 2 low grades on my transcript, but also acknowledge how i've excelled in another area? Should I mention being Secretary of the Spanish Honorary Society, and volunteering I've done?

Oh, and i also have no idea what to write for an intro

So, if anyone wouldn't mind looking it over I'd appreciate it. THANKS

[fuzzylogician]

I'm on my 2nd draft of my SOP. My first one was horrible and now this one, although much more concise i'm just not sure about it. I haven't included any personality traits--because I'm not sure if i should? Should I acknowledge 2 low grades on my transcript, but also acknowledge how i've excelled in another area? Should I mention being Secretary of the Spanish Honorary Society, and volunteering I've done?

Oh, and i also have no idea what to write for an intro

So, if anyone wouldn't mind looking it over I'd appreciate it. THANKS

The people at LiveJournal's appylingtograd read SOPs and give great advice, you should try them.

To answer your questions:

- Personality traits are something that should shine through the wording/structure of your essay, it's not something you want to dedicate a paragraph to. You could also have a LOR writer address whatever it is you want the adcom to know.

- My opinion is that unless you have a GOOD reason, usually it's not a good idea to mention 1-2 bad grades. Rather, let your record speak for itself. Why direct attention away from all the good stuff to the few blemishes you have on your transcript? Same goes for saying how you excelled in your other classes, the adcom will know that when they look at your transcript and you're not adding any new information by telling them that story (=it's a waste of space). Even if you have a good reason and decide to address the issue - do it positively, and in no more than 1-2 sentences.

- I don't think it's appropriate to mention honorary societies and volunteering; the SOP is about your Research interests, your goals, your future plans. None of that other stuff is relevant unless you somehow gained research experience doing it (which I doubt).

[Ziz]

How long should it be? I know it probably varies by school, but as a general rule?

Also (sorry, British grad here who has no experience with American applications), I'm a bit confused about how much you're supposed to know about your proposed research. For my UK apps I have had to put together a 3,000 word research proposal that basically outlines exactly what I'm going to argue and how I'm going to do it. Obviously that's not appropriate for US schools. What I don't understand is whether you should be saying something along the lines of:

"I'm interested in the problem of inter-generational justice and global inequality"

or

"I'm interested in whether Scanlon's contractualism can provide a better response to the problems of inter-generational justice and global inequality and will show this by using government debt as a case study."

I'm just wondering because it seems like the first 2 years of American PhDs are what we in the UK do as our masters degree (i.e. mostly coursework). However, for our masters degrees we were only expected to have a vague idea of what we were interested in (i.e. sentence 1) but now that we are ready for PhDs, we're supposed to have a very specific idea (sentence 2). So my question is...when applying to US PhDs, am I supposed to know exaclty what I want to study (sentence 2) or a broader idea that will be better worked out after 2 years of coursework (sentence 1). DOes that make ANY sense??

[southerntransplant]

The people at LiveJournal's appylingtograd read SOPs and give great advice, you should try them.

To answer your questions:

- Personality traits are something that should shine through the wording/structure of your essay, it's not something you want to dedicate a paragraph to. You could also have a LOR writer address whatever it is you want the adcom to know.

- My opinion is that unless you have a GOOD reason, usually it's not a good idea to mention 1-2 bad grades. Rather, let your record speak for itself. Why direct attention away from all the good stuff to the few blemishes you have on your transcript? Same goes for saying how you excelled in your other classes, the adcom will know that when they look at your transcript and you're not adding any new information by telling them that story (=it's a waste of space). Even if you have a good reason and decide to address the issue - do it positively, and in no more than 1-2 sentences.

- I don't think it's appropriate to mention honorary societies and volunteering; the SOP is about your Research interests, your goals, your future plans. None of that other stuff is relevant unless you somehow gained research experience doing it (which I doubt).

I suspected all of this, but while searching the internet i've seen people mentioning some of these things in the SOPs and that made me second guess myself GRRRRR thanks

[JerryLandis]

Ziz, I think you'll be at a distinct advantage if you have concrete plans for a PhD thesis. Although I have no real life experience in dealing with American admissions folk, I think what you want to do is show that you have specific, well thought-out interests you'd like to pursue, but that your interests are also flexible. After all, if you enroll in one of those programmes you'll have to take 2 years of classes that will be equally if not less specialised than the ones you took in your honours years as an undergraduate. For example, one of the places I am applying to requires, 3/8 of the courses you take to be within your field (i.e. medieval history), but the other 5 are supposed to be outside that field! Much more broad than what is expected over here. As for your personal statement, I'd include both a vague description and a more specific one. You could lead with your example sentence one, and then say, "Specifically, this would entail [insert content of example sentence two]." Of course, what you should probably do is email the relevant professors at the places you are applying to and tell them what kind of research you'd like to pursue. Their responses will give you a general idea of how your research proposal might be received by those who read your application.

As for the original poster, I am sorry I don't have much to say that's relevant to you!

[fuzzylogician]

As for your personal statement, I'd include both a vague description and a more specific one. You could lead with your example sentence one, and then say, "Specifically, this would entail [insert content of example sentence two]."

This. The paradox of the American application system is that you want to appear focused (=demonstrate good fit with the department's faculty) but at the same time not too focused (=demonstrate open-mindedness, willingness to grow and change as the result of taking the courses in the first 2 years). It's a delicate balance, but you should talk about your past experience and how it led you to the specific areas/questions that interest you, but you might also want to mention broader interests, resources, courses, whatever it is that makes the program a good fit, besides having that 1-2 cool professors.