how to make a big life choice in 3 weeks!!

[cactus77]

I've been lucky enough to be accepted to many of my grad programs, but there are two amazing schools that I am torn between - one is a PhD program and one is an MA. Both are fully funded with a 20k+ stipend. The problem is, they are each in entirely different fields. Whichever one I choose will essentially determine my career trajectory, and that is a hard choice to have to make in only a few weeks! Both career options greatly interest me, and ideally I would like to find a way to merge them to an extent, but at this point I honestly don't know what to do or how to make this choice by April 15th. I am afraid that no matter which I choose, I will always wonder what it would have been like to attend the other program, and I don't want to go through graduate school (or life) regretting my decision. The MA program was an outlier for me - I knew it was outside of my originally intended field, but I honestly didn't think that I would get in because it is so competitive. This MA is unlike any other in the world so I know it would be an incredible experience that would set me up very well for getting a job in that field. On the flip side, I would feel kind of strange turning down such a well-regarded PhD program, something that I've always dreamed of being accepted to. I know it would maybe be possible to do the MA and return to a PhD after, but I don't know how I will feel about that at the end of two years - or perhaps that would be silly since I could just start the PhD now and not delay it. Additionally, I am still rather mentally beholden to the opinions of my parents (as much as I wish I wasn't) and they seem to be very pro-PhD, which may be due to the fact that I don't think they really understand what a big deal this MA is. In literally ANY other case, I would never chose an MA over a PhD. But this is such a unique situation. 

 I wish there was a way I could do both. Does anyone have any advice for properly thinking through these big decisions? Anyone in a similar situation?

I'm already an incredibly indecisive person, so I am really struggling here. And I am super grateful to be in this position in the first place (when I started the grad school application process I thought I wasn't going to get in anywhere thanks to imposter syndrome) - but that doesn't really make it any easier. 

Help! 

Edited March 23, 2016 by cactus77

[C Laree]

If you can visit the schools--do. I think this is really important so that you can get a feel for the people you would be working with and the environment you would be living in for X amount of years. I am also incredibly indecisive and I know I won't be happy until I can see the full picture and weigh my options with more information.

 

Best of luck!

[embe87]

Hi @cactus77, thanks for being so open about your feelings around this challenging decision. I could relate to your post in many ways. I went back to graduate studies twice for different master's degrees and have worked in a variety of fields. Would've never imagined my path would be a windy one, but goodness, it's been rewarding, fulfilling, and SO exciting. Now I'm finally settled on a home discipline and career trajectory after testing the waters in various domains... oh yeah, by testing the waters, also include trips to various campuses across North America and Europe, long (and follow-up) chats with prospective supervisors, lots of reflection and freakouts, and many conversations with professor-mentors, close friends, recent PhD graduates, and current PhD students. 

For my first Master's, I had to decide between two completely different disciplines. And I ended up choosing based on my immediate intention (to practice a particular profession) and my priority (gain experience). I chose the route that would help me better professionally, which mean giving up a funded spot in a research-intensive program. I didn't want to delve into the world of research too prematurely. During the program, I realized I was more interested in research, but I still finished the program and practiced for a few years. I don't regret the choice AT ALL because those years enabled me to develop a nuanced and quite frankly deeper understanding of the field. I was ten times more deliberate and informed for the next move. And this experience and perspective was obvious, compared to my counterparts who quickly went from program to program without a breath for work experience. But even now, my work and research interests continue to be morph, and continue to be interdisciplinary. In many ways, I'm glad to have done the master's degrees because I can speak from a variety of perspectives and look at issues from many positions, using different lenses. 

You're making a decision in a particular moment in time. Know you'll be studying something for a duration of time - it doesn't mean you cannot get into a new area of work or research. You can always go back for more training, more courses, more readings, another degree. If you're competitive for a PhD program at this stage, I'd say you'll be a competitive applicant should you want to reapply to that program or another one down the line.

Also, note that a PhD is a marathon, whereas a MA is more of a sprint. Both are challenging, sure, but the demands on you as a PhD student last a minimum of 4-5 years, more, depending on your field... and even longer if you are then entering postdoc position(s) or tenure track life. A serious commitment to make, in my eyes. You may or may not know, a lot of people will drop out of the PhD because it's not suited for their career paths, interests, or life goals. So from my perspective, you should think about what you want to be doing in 2 to 5 to 10 years time, while knowing these ideas may change. If you're young and/or without major commitments, you have a lot of time to explore and figure it out.

When I met with prospective PhD supervisors (last year and back in 2013), they all asked me about why I was seeking to earn a PhD. Back in 2013, sure I liked research, but I didn't have the clarity and focus I have now about my work and why the doctoral training is the only way to go. They also asked me about my long term goals. Back in 2013, I definitely could not say with certainty that I wanted to be a professor at a university. Gosh, I could just remember I could barely decide on a home discipline, prospective programs, or a research topic for the darn application itself. Too many opportunities, too many interests, and quite frankly, I had very little background information, experience, and insight to help me make the decision. So I delayed. Fast forward to 2016, I have a clear sense of what I'm getting myself into and what I want to accomplish. 

This may be very terrifying to accept if you're like me, if you like to plan and think through career options and pathways years in advance... but truth be told, plans do change. What you prioritize now can and WILL LIKELY shift in 1 month, 3 months, let alone one year. Sometimes these shifts are subtle, other times drastic. So whether you choose the MA or the PhD program, you'll adapt and change course based on the experiences you gain from the program itself and the people you meet. Allow yourself the leeway, the latitude to have things evolve throughout the process. I don't think you'll make a wrong choice either way - both sound like good choices, but it really all depends on your priorities and goals, even in the short term. Happy to dialogue some more should it be helpful for you to continue to write through your thinking process.

I suppose you don't have that much time to make a decision, but if you have a few weeks, maybe consider checking out these books.

• Nettles and Millet: Three Magic Letters: Getting to Ph.D.
• Gardner and Mendoza (Eds.): On Becoming a Scholar: Socialization and Development in Doctoral Education
• Lovitts: Leaving the Ivory Tower: The Causes and Consequences of Departure from Doctoral Study

[Neist]

On 3/23/2016 at 10:32 PM, cactus77 said:

I wish there was a way I could do both. Does anyone have any advice for properly thinking through these big decisions? Anyone in a similar situation?

I faced this very decision a few weeks ago. Here's few of the mental steps I took which ultimately finalized my decision.

1. How rare is either opportunity? If the MA is incredibly difficult to get into, and the PhD program (or ones of a similar status or ranking) isn't as much so, I'd consider attending the MA program. For example, the dual degree I've accepted is fairly difficult to obtain funding in, and I know if I were ever to reapply that the chances of funding are probably unlikely. Have to take break when it appears, I say.
2. Will the MA program make you a better applicant for a PhD program afterwards? As annoying as it might be to reapply to PhD programs in two years, you might be able to do far better than the PhD program you were accepted into. You parents might lean towards the PhD program, but attending MA programs can be incredibly beneficial to your health and growth as a scholar.
3. What are the career paths that each program opens? Does one program necessarily exclude a career path that the other offers? I ultimately chose a program that gave me the most flexibility, regardless of what I decide to do in a few years.

I considered these points every day, and I eventually found myself leaning towards one program. As much as I loved the other program, I found myself creating reasons why I shouldn't attend the one I chose.