TOEFL Writing Sample

[Tamim Ahmed]

Hello, I am planning to appear TOEFL exam very soon. I need help to evaluate my assay and what score I will get on TOEFL exam. It would be a great help if someone go through my writing sample and suggest necessary correction.

Question:

Some parents forbid young children from owning smart phones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why?

My answer:

Smart phones are very important to keep up with the modern life. Having a smart phone from a very young age helps a student to easily access the information of the world in a very short time. So, I think having a smart phone at a young age is very important for development of a student.

The most important benefits of having a smart phones is that helps a student in education. Moreover, if a student gets stuck in a paritcular topic which one needs to go through many books to find an answer, in that case, using a smart phone one can search by just typing something in smart phones using search engines like Google, Yahoo etc. Additionally, students can download any books, articles etc. in the easiest way.

Modern technology is advancing rapidly day by day. To keep up with the modern standards, students need to be introduced with the modern technology. Because, previously before internet, people used different letters, telegrams for communication, but nowadays one can communicate just by using different social networks like Facebook, Imo, Snapchat, Skype etc. Maybe, after 50 years, technology will find a better way for communication.

For entertainment, nowadays, people used different sites like Youtube, Dailymotion etc. Now people don't rely on a particular program to be telecast on TV. Moreover, student can communicate through email, chat etc. when they are in bus, subways etc., they don't need to go to their home, turn on computer for communication, therefore, saves time.

Although having a smart phone is useful, but in some cases, student misuses it. Some students go to different adult sites which demerits their characters. Also, some students pass so many times with their phones and hampers their education. So, having a smart phone is useful as long as students use to the limit and for the improvements of their life.

Smart phones are one of the most benevolent tools for a student. In fact, in modern world, smart phones are must. Because, world is changing day by day. One person having the smart phones helps oneself to better acquainted with the modern world. Students are the future and therefore, at a young age having a smart phones helps themselves to be developed easily and cope up with the modern world.