zephyr201

Eigen and Jenste, thank you both so much for your input. It means quite a lot. Eigen, thanks for letting me know of your experienced of this going sour for another graduate student. I think of that story and just cringe. Jenste, that is a great idea. Since I'm only a few hours away, would you suggest meeting them in person and discussing whether they are willing to take new grad students on? Or simply email them and ask, then if they say yes, take the drive out and discuss the specifics.

Pretty penny, Although I'm also a first year, I can say that the load of 14 credits, 20 hours of TAing, and the NSF grant proposal is pretty unreasonable -- especially for a first year student. I've only seen people doing either of those things, not all of them. A comment about the last post you wrote: "In general, I say what I think, she dismisses it, and I have to end up just nodding my head and agreeing." If this continues to happen (in the case that you don't switch advisors), I would suggest following up your original concerns with a question. For example, maybe asking something like 1) what she feels you should do or 2) what she thinks about it. This way she'll be prodded into answering your dilemma rather than dismissing your concerns and moving on. I've found that if you simply state concerns, some advisors might just think you're getting something off of your back, then move on. Anyway, like fuzzylogician and others, I am anxious to hear how your meeting went. And don't worry, whatever happens, you will be fine. I'm sure you are more than a fantastic asset to your lab.

TLDR: I am a biology student who just started a PhD program (don't have a master's). Religious culture at current institution is driving me nuts. Have been accepted at another school for this season (Fall '13), and they will let me move schools if I find an advisor who will take me on as a student. What is the chance of talking with professors at target school to see if they'll take me as a student will backfire and make my life miserable (i.e., current advisor gets a phone call and the whole plan goes to shit and doesn't work out)? I'd like to first say that I've read a ton on these forums and elsewhere to filter advice relevant to my situation, but haven't seen anything about what the chances are of everything falling apart when trying to leave your current institution. I hope I will be welcomed here, and am desperately searching for any advice. Thank you for your time and energy for reading this and giving it some thought. I applied to a few schools specifically to work with professors in the area of research I'm interested in. I narrowed it down to two schools and then ended up picking the one that gave me a larger stipend. My current advisor is a great guy. He's at the stage where he's going for tenure and working to death getting publications. The lab is doing pretty cool work, too. However, I find that outside of the lab realm, the culture here is really starting to hurt my mental well being. After being here for about half a year (I started working early), the over-the-top religious culture is driving me absolutely fucking nuts. Girls aren't interested in dating "non-members", and friends are hard to make once they figure out you aren't going to convert. Now, before you release the dogs on me, I must say that I visited this current school for about a week to 'preview' it, and the people here did an amazing job of playing down how much the religion is ingrained into everything they do -- pretty much all of social activities revolve around their church. I should also mention that I am doing well here in both courses and my research, according to my grades and advisor. So, I called the administrator from the department of the other school I was interested in and accepted to, and they informed me that as long as I find an advisor who will take me on, they will transfer my first semester and I'll be able to switch schools. The advisor I initially wanted to work for already found a student that took my place, but there are others at that school (both within and outside that department) who are doing research I'd be really interested in picking up. I'm only a handful of hours away from my current target school. I'd like to take a ride out there and meet with a few of the other professors whose work I'm interested in and 1) describe the predicament I'm in as well as 2) see if they have any openings or funding for another grad student. I don't really want to bring up the situation with my current advisor until I know exactly whether or not I'll have a spot with a mentor at the target school. I think it would be pretty shitty to say, "I'd like to leave," then not have any other profs take me on and be stuck at the current school with an additional awkward milieu. However, I'm scared that the professors of interest at the target school will want to know more about my current work and make a phone call to my current advisor. If I take the chance and talk with them, what's the possibility that they'll shoot for this contact and completely fuck up my rep with the current advisor? Is talking with the other profs a bad idea? Would you go about doing this a different way that I haven't mentioned in this post? To reinstate, I cannot muster living here any longer. Once again, thanks so much for taking the time to read this and lending your energy through thought. It means a lot to me, as I am just not quite sure what I should do.