robot_hamster

This all sounds like good advice. Thank you everyone! I was a manager's assistant for a few years when I still worked full-time. I didn't do too bad at that, but I also knew everything I needed to know since I had been working there for quite some time prior to that. Basically, if she wasn't there, then I was in charge and I needed to make sure everything got done. It involved telling people what needed to get done and dividing up the work.

I'm not necessarily soft-spoken, I just prefer to avoid conflicts. I can't handle someone getting in my face about something and trying to start an argument. I work retail and sometimes I even get intimidated by customers that decide to be extra beotchy. This causes me to become flustered and I lose track of what I'm supposed to be doing on the cash register. I think it is obvious too because my face and neck with start turning beet red. For the one class that I think I will be okay with because I know something about the subject, I think I will be going by whatever the professor wants syllabus-wise. He also has grading guidelines that he wants me to follow. Sort of like a check-list, does the work have this and that sort of thing. The other class, I have absolutely no clue what is expected of me yet. I have yet to meet the professor since all of this came about so suddenly and now it is winter break.

I was talking about this TA position on here and it looks like things will probably work out. But now something else has just occurred to me. I have never been a TA before and I am terrified! I think I will be okay doing the lab sections for the one class, but the other class is in an area that I know nothing about. Plus I don't know what I will be doing for that class, so it is pretty scary for me. I was wondering what other people's experiences have been. Do professors generally expect that you're going to be dumb your first time being a TA? I'm worried because obviously I want to do a good job so I will be recommended for other things in the future. Also, how do you handle students? Especially when you don't know the answer! I tend to be a bit emotional about things, I blame it on hormones since I have an imbalance. I'm afraid that I will burst out crying or something if someone yells at me. I mean, I cry at the commercials on TV that show all the pictures of neglected animals.

Thank you! Yes, it has been frustrating. I am still optimistic though, it's just a waiting game at this point to see if they can work something out. As for my job, I work about 20-25 hours a week. My adviser is completely aware of it, but I don't think it was required of me to tell him about it. If all I have is coursework, then they shouldn't have any concern anyway. My major does not require anyone to work in the lab, only those who have a RA position work in the lab. Personally, the first semester was just a lot of reading, paper writing, and then giving presentations on those papers. One class did require a research project that involved spending some time in the lab, but it didn't take up a lot of my time. I would tell you that everything will work out for you eventually, but I don't think I can. I took a HUGE risk going to grad school without funding. I took out a loan to pay the tuition and I worked the entire time. I agree with suspechosa, it really really sucks when you have to choose between eating or heating your house. You may even find yourself choosing between getting a reasonable grade on a paper or going to work to make money. I struggled with the decision to go and I am lucky that I will (hopefully) have this TA position for my second semester. There are no guarantees though for following semesters, so I have to hope that I do really well for this whole TA thing so that the professors will either use me again or recommend me to someone else. If you have already applied and been rejected several times, I would say give things without funding a shot. But don't waste more than one semester on it. If things prove to be too difficult and you cannot find any funding for your second semester, then it would probably be wise to look elsewhere.

My school has a minimum GPA requirement, but I think it's like 3.2 or something.

I just finished up my first semester of grad school, no assistance whatsoever. I work at a store, the same place I worked while an undergrad. It is sometimes difficult to balance work and school since I NEED the money but I also need to get all those papers written and whatnot. I am used to it since this is how things were all through undergrad. I would suggest looking for a job that is student-friendly. One that allows to have a weird availability that changes each semester. If you can find a job where you can work weekends, then that helps. That way you can dedicate more time during the week to your studies. Luckily (or at least I hope so at this point, things are a bit wishy-washy) I will have a TA position for next semester. You never know, you might find something after one semester as well. At my school, mass e-mails go out to all of the grad students about things that are going on. If a professor has suddenly found themselves without a TA, they will often send out an e-mail in order to fill the position fast. You just have to keep your eyes peeled and reply to stuff as soon as it hits your mailbox (yes, I check my e-mail like 20 times a day).

Everyone in our area pitches in to get her something every year, it's not anything expensive. If you don't want to pitch in, then your name doesn't go on the card. I have worked there for 10 years and this is just what we have always done. We appreciate everything our boss does for us so we want to do something nice. People in the other areas do similar things for their managers as well. I don't think I would be upset if someone got promoted, but I guess that is just me. Then again, I don't think I would want my boss's job! Haha! I suppose if it was an individual getting their employer something it would be a little more weird and that would include an adviser. But I would feel comfortable bringing something that I made that perhaps my adviser could share with others. That's why I said cookies would be nice. You can't go wrong with food! And it is more of a gesture than an actual gift so you don't have to worry about getting too personal.

I hope so! I'm going to talk to someone in HR when I go to work. I'm still stuck in this limbo of not knowing though, so I'm not sure what to say to them. I'm still hoping that they can get the assistantship worked out somehow. Some sort of compromise maybe?

What sucks is that I already told my crap job that I wouldn't be maintaining my part-time status with them anymore.

I did not have an assistantship this semester. I was looking for something for next semester and I was informed a little while ago that they had found something for me. I was so excited because they said it would waive my tuition, etc. Now it looks like it won't work out. I feel so frustrated. Sorry, just needed to vent a little.

I have to have a paper done by Thursday while trying to study for a test at the same time. I'm pretty much pulling stuff out of my butt at this point.

We always get our boss a gift for Christmas where I work.

Cookies sound nice.

Was your name listed first? If it helps at all, if your work is ever cited it will be your name et al. I can understand why you are upset though, I probably would be too. I would find out exactly what the protocol is on authorship. In some labs, if several people are working on separate but related projects that are all funded through the same grant then they may end up being placed as co-authors on whatever papers are produced from the lab whether they worked directly on the project or not (because, in a way that may be very small, they contributed somehow to the work being published). Not fair, but that is sometimes how it works.

Whoa, where did I say I was going to go to someone of authority and accuse this person of sexual harassment? People were suggesting I talk to a councilor or a friend about it, so that is what I meant when I said I think I will talk to someone about it. My intention is not to drag someone's name through the mud, heck I wouldn't even have to name names when talking to someone about it. I just want to be able to sort my thoughts/feelings out about this and to figure out the best way to handle things so that I don't find myself in an even worse situation. I don't want to shrug it off as nothing because that is how bad things happen (not saying something bad would happen, but it doesn't hurt to be aware of things). Also, as I explained before, this person is not in the graduate program but an employee of the department.

Thank you to those of you that told me to trust my instincts. I don't think I am making something out of nothing and, yes, plenty of men have opened doors for me. There is nothing wrong with someone being a gentlemen. This particular person does make me uncomfortable, his body language and tone of voice are just "off". I think it would be wise of me to not simply shrug it off. I think I will take your advice and talk to someone about it. I certainly wouldn't want to place myself in a situation where things could escalate. Thanks for the advice!

You are correct. This person is a he and I am a she, I was just trying to avoid sexist assumptions. Perhaps this person is trying to be friendly. I guess his gestures are those that I would expect from someone I know. I have no problem being friends with someone of the opposite sex. As an undergrad, there were plenty of people I would joke around with. It was completely platonic. I have similar situations at work. When a male grad student was talking to me earlier in the semester during an event we were attending, I had absolutely no problem talking with him, telling him about myself, etc. But this person that I am describing in my original post is different. He hasn't said anything inappropriate, but just reading his body language makes me feel uncomfortable. I guess it is difficult to explain. He acts in a way that you would expect someone you have known for years to act, not someone who you don't really know. He is just creepy and his mannerisms remind me of someone who was making unwanted advances toward me years ago at my work. Does that make sense? So should I just ignore them? I don't want to seem to friendly as they may take that as a sign that I am welcoming their attempts to talk to me.

There is someone at school who has been making me feel uncomfortable and I am not sure what to do about it. The first time I saw this person, we happened to be getting onto an elevator together. They were trying to make small talk with me, but I was in a hurry so I excused myself from them the second the doors opened. After that, I kept running into them here and there. They would open the door for me, smile and wave, and try to make small talk. At first I thought they were a grad student like myself, but when I looked through pictures on our online directory I found out they were on staff as research faculty (not a professor). This sort of creeps me out even more. I am married and I feel like this person is trying to flirt with me. Normally I am flattered when someone tries to flirt with me and then I politely tell them that I am married. But for some reason, this particular situation has started to make me feel really uncomfortable. Perhaps it is because I have been feeling so intimidated by everything that is grad school, I don't know. What would you do if you were in this situation? Ignore them? Avoid them? Politely tell them to take a hike?

Okay, thank you. It sounds like I will still be able to do the loan, but I will check with them just to make sure. Getting my tuition waived seems silly if I don't have enough money to cover the bills while attending.

I'm confused. Why would I owe them money? I filled out the FAFSA for the 2010-2011 school year already, that is how I got the loan for this (Fall 2010) semester. When you accept the financial aid, you accept it for the entire school year. The funds are dispersed in two parts, one for each semester. The loan went to pay my tuition and then they issued me a refund for the remainder which I used for living expenses. My tuition will only be waived for the Spring 2011 semester. I just wanted to know if I will still be allowed to take out some of the loan money because the stipend isn't very much money and it won't cover my living expenses.

I took out a loan to cover tuition and living expenses this first semester of grad school. I will have an assistantship next semester that includes a stipend and tuition remission. The stipend, however, is not very big. Do you think they will still let me take out a loan (not a huge amount) to cover the gap? I accepted financial aid for both semesters at the beginning of this (fall) semester because I didn't know if I would have an assistantship next semester or not. I just didn't know if the funds would still be distributed to my account if my tuition charges are zero or if they just wouldn't issue the loan. If they do disperse the loan, I would obviously send some of it back since I wouldn't need all of it. Has anyone ever had experience with this?

Thanks for the advice. I have been trying to find stuff that is relevant to what I'm interested in. I guess my biggest problem is that I don't know what is and is not possible. My school does have a lot of resources, but my research might require me to do some traveling or obtaining data from other sources. Since I currently do not have any funding, I am afraid that my opinions are going to be limited.

I am doing a thesis for my MS and I am having a very hard time narrowing something down. Maybe you guys could tell me how you figured it out? As I talked about in another thread, my adviser is not someone who has the same interests as I do. They are actually in a completely different department. I just feel so, well, stupid. I am taking a class that talks about how to write a research proposal and whatnot. Everyone else in the class seems to know exactly what they want to do. So far we have worked on what we would like our research questions to be. I struggled with this greatly and what I came up with seemed so broad. Everyone else seemed to have everything pinned down (we shared our stuff in class). Am I the only person who has felt like this? I guess it would help if I could get more opportunities to talk to people with similar interests, but this class is just moving so fast and it is very hard to get professors to talk to you for some reason. Is there any way I can explore these things on my own? The literature out there is so overwhelming, I can't imagine where to begin as far as sifting through it goes.

I don't know if you read this in another thread, but this is a cause for worry for me. I am in classes that I would not consider all that constructive toward my course of study. The person who was processing my paperwork apparently quit their job. Somehow, my stuff got lost between point A and point B. By the time we had things figured out, it was way past open registration. So most classes were already full by the time I was allowed to register. So I was basically just plopped into my classes. I do enjoy one of them, but it has nothing to do with my area of expertise (other than in a philosophical sense). It just has a lot of reading of literature and open discussions, which I like. Another class I have is sort of a "skill" class. And, well, I'm finding that I am not all that interested in it and I'm questioning how useful it will actually be to me. My last class is just a "how to" seminar that goes over developing research ideas and how to write a proposal. Useful information for down the road, but it doesn't really help me get anywhere. So you can understand why there is so much disconnection here. I'm not working for anyone as an RA or TA and I haven't had much opportunity to talk to people who might be able to "hook me up". My hope is that the director will be able to prop the door open for me so I can at least talk to people. I just wish there was something else that I could do. I realize that there won't be much hope for an open position somewhere until next semester, so I guess it is sort of a waiting game.

I updated my other thread, but nobody seems to want to respond. So I'm starting a new thread. Anyway, I went higher up like everyone advised. The person I talked to was the director. The conversation started out like they were concerned, it was disturbing to hear a student in so much distress or something. Then the conversation progressed over toward me needing to be working there and it was my own fault that I wasn't (never mind that I tried and tried contacting professors until I finally gave up). They are supposed to be helping me set up appointments with professors, sort of twisting their arms I guess. My hope is that I will meet someone who would be an appropriate new adviser for me. I still feel like an outcast though and I worry about getting my hopes up. They say that the way to get an assistantship (either RA or TA), you need to be "in" with the right people. But so far, it all seems like empty promises. I just want to make sure I handled this correctly and it at least sounds like I am going in the right direction for once. My spouse thinks I should have done more, but I honestly don't know what it would be. I'm more wanting to beat myself up because I discovered that there had been a TA position that I could have possibly gone for. I had no clue that such a thing applied to me (at my old school, you had to have taken the class already in order to be a TA). But I guess that isn't the case and I missed out on an opportunity. I just worry that other opportunities just aren't going to come. I feel so stupid. But I guess, I went into all of this with no guidance whatsoever. I was basically plopped in there and they expected me to figure things out on my own. Advice at this point would be greatly appreciated! Please!