lotsoffeelings

Does anyone know what kinds of questions are appropriate to ask when you're on waitlist somewhere (in this case, UW)? I am a novice to this whole process and generally afraid of emailing people in general. I mostly want to know 1) size of waitlist 2) general timeline for the process, but I'm not sure the best way to frame these questions.

It's such a tricky thing, because I'm also wondering why I paid like $800 to get no real feedback except "sorry, no." On the other hand, I know how much extra labor people in general are asked to do in academia so I'm wary of calling for something like robust individual feedback outright. But as I think about the possibility of reapplying, I do want to know if there's anything I could have done differently. The email you received is a good reminder that it is usually not about a lack of qualifications, but other random decisions made my flawed humans. I keep going through my materials, and there's nothing more I could have done for most of them (4.0, 99th percentile GRE, LORs from "prestigious institution"), and I would guess I might get some kind of response similar to yours. In terms of what is left to work on in the next year, I am going to turn to more professors/friends for feedback on SoP and WS, since those are the only things left to improve at this point.

Agree with all the advice offered above. I'm a newcomer to the forum, but I think it's definitely a place to hold space for other's pain and lift up those who are having success. I'm trying to frame my potential shut-out in terms of having more time to consider what I really want to do with life in the long-term. For so long, the PhD has just been the logical next-step such that I never really took time to reflect on what taking that step meant and what life would be like beyond it. I'm hoping to take the next few months to explore what else is out there, including everything from publishing to law school to pubic policy think tanks, haha. Even if I end up getting in off the waitlist and deciding to go, I think I will be entering into it with a much deeper commitment to it and understanding of why I want to do it.

I am sorry to hear that sending feelings of hope and resilience your way

agreed! Just got my rejection from Princeton and was weirdly relieved to get it. and also, if I didn't want to leave the door open to reapply at Columbia, I would totally withdrawal my application today to get to do the rejecting for once!

lololol I too identify with that hairball. v abject. my thesis advisor is waiting for me to send her pages and I have been playing sporcle quizzes all morning instead because it's the only thing that makes me feel better right now

Thinking about my post last night, and how frustrating this process of delayed rejections is because it really disrupts the necessary stages of acceptance/closure. For almost every school, you have to see people get acceptances and then wait an arbitrary amount of time to hear back. Besides invisible waitlists, is there any reason why schools don't send rejection notices at the same time as acceptances? For the past week, I've been stuck in the cycle of breaking down and then feeling like I need to suspend grief until things are officially over. Seems cruel esp. in the case of somewhere like Columbia where I didn't interview and so there shouldn't be any further review of my app going on.

I think the importance of a deep breath cannot be overstated in these kinds of situations, so you're definitely doing the right thing. I think it's okay to take time to grieve, much like you would after a bad breakup (which I am also conveniently going through simultaneously with rejections, lol life). It's kind of like those first few weeks/months after the breakup when you think you will never fall in love again, but slowly slowly slowly space opens up your heart and you begin to imagine new ways of being and loving and getting by. I'm reminding myself that I don't have to make the decision to apply again too urgently, and it's okay if I feel like I don't have the strength to reapply in this moment. That strength will come in time if it needs to, and wishing the same for you. Hang in there ❤️

20th/21st c, Marxism, realism

I'm on the waitlist at UW and will be faced with a similar decision should I get off. Two of my professors at my current institution (Duke) went there and speak very highly of the program, so it seems like they have a good reputation from what I know. Also Seattle is cool I hear! Never been but def want to go!

I am probably going to do the same thing tomorrow lol. I know I should give myself a break, but I am addicted now and can't look back

^^^^ literally me rn

Thanks, that's helpful. I am 20th/21st c so that's kind of what set off the spiral of anxiety when I saw that someone else in my period interviewed. I'm just going to count it as implied rejection and try to move on.

And also, if anyone can confirm that no interview at Columbia = rejection? Mixed info about their interview process and kind of just want to rip that band-aid off.

hi everyone, I've been lurking on this for a while now. Like others, I've been in the pits of despair these last few weeks (3r/0a/1w/5p) with 2 of those 5p implied rejections (NYU & Columbia). Soliciting self-care tips for these stressful times as I, like many here, struggle with depression/anxiety and this process is kind of killing me slowly. Any advice welcome, and congrats to those who have already been accepted ❤️