habanero

After I began to get single negative downvotes on random old posts ( etc). I dropped around ~10 positive votes in 1 day without posting any new information. Many of the downvotes have been on highly-rated old posts in very inactive threads. I, of course, don't mind people expressing their opinions--but I don't feel like that is the case here. Right after the linked thread ended, the negative user began voting down all of my new comments obsessively. I spoke to a mod, but they said that they were unable to do anything about it. I stopped caring, but I can't ignore it after logging in today and seeing that the user has gone so far back. I've tried hard to be a positive member of this forum, but it is impossible when a user is systematically stalking my posts. It's taking an emotional toll on me. It might be silly to want to rack up positive votes on an internet forum, but I don't care. If this kind of behavior were going on in real life, I'd be getting a restraining order. To the rest of the awesome posters on here: thanks for everything. Best of luck in graduate school! Don't say anything to make that user upset, or they might do the same thing to you.

I've always been 'the baby' and got my undergrad degree at 19. I totally understand your fear, but you will be a novelty. People aren't going to be envious of you unless they are very shallow and petty. Please enjoy yourself! You will do well. Make sure to get some friends your own age lest you become too serious! haha

Go by which department is a better fit. You couldn't go wrong with either school.

Durham is not boring (ok, compared to being near San Fran, nearly ANYTHING will seem boring...haha), and Duke is a great school. I would take the money and go to Duke. Do you really want to be working 20 hours a week if you don't need to be? I guess it depends on just how much better Berkeley is. Please, do you have any other information?

I also think you should consider ssh-ing into your main computer.

Sorry, letigre. I didn't mean for that to come off harshly, and I hope that I didn't seem like I was trivializing your very difficult choice. It's hard to convey meaning over the internet. Best of luck in your graduate studies.

All of them, and I'd fly in-between schools as needed.

I told my employer and they suggested that I give notice. Just keep in mind that they will probably not want you to work for them once they know. I wanted to do the honest thing and I don't regret my decision, but do realize that your employer owes you no allegiance. Good luck! :-D

Why apply for a safety if you didn't actually consider it to be an option? I say take it--unless your prospects for a job will be severely hampered by your Charlotte decision.

Uh, of course! My studies are my passion in life!!! Is that weird?

You couldn't make a wrong decision between those three schools, tmac_cj. It will be less expensive to live in Michigan and Illinois. They all have good brand names and awesome faculty. Do you have any specific questions that will help you make your decision?

Wow, UNC doesn't have prestige? Are any of your family members in academia/computer science? UNC is an AMAZING school with an AMAZING Comp Sci program. It does sound like Duke really wants you and is going to work hard to make it happen for you. Don't discount that. However, don't pick Duke because some of your family members think it is better. If you do choose Duke, can't you work some graphics into your computer vision studies? Haha, I hope I don't sound like I'm gunning for you to go to Duke. I'm not. I just want you to choose the school that is the right fit, and it really seems as though Duke wants to give you everything good. General program fit can be more important than research, because your interests may change. Grad school is a long time. I would try and make a visit to NC if you can. Duke and UNC are not so far from each other, and you could easily do the whole trip in a weekend. (EDIT, I just saw that you are from Pakistan)

I would definitely choose Boulder over Utah. Do you have any specific questions?

UIUC, without a doubt. Like, seriously. You couldn't make a wrong decision if you just had to choose schools, but you aren't funded. You can live in Illinois for next to nothing. UCLA will be VERY expensive. Of course UCLA has better weather, but you'll be paying quite dearly for a few years in the sun. Also, LA isn't especially close to Silicon Valley. It's around a 5-6 hour drive.

I know a few grad students from those schools. The Duke students seem much more relaxed, while the UNC students seem fairly stressed. I got the impression that UNC's program is much more strict. Have you visited the schools?

So, I accepted a school and it is now final. It was my dream school, but I also got accepted to a few other top schools. My mind has been racing--is it the right decision? I mean, I know that it is (otherwise it wouldn't have been my dream in the first place), but when does this feeling of "OMG THIS IS MY TERMINAL DEGREE DID I DO THE RIGHT THING" go away?

Oh my good heavens...forever more will I wonder who could have possibly voted that innocent comment down.

Ok all, thank you for the advice. I said something along the lines of: Dear X, Thank you for your interest/time/etc. X University is amazing, and I had such a good time/X/XXX/whatever. It has been a difficult decision, but I've decided to attend XX. I very much look forward to seeing you at X conference. +something personal Best, HABANERO

You could always volunteer 10 hours per week in a lab if you have no other options. Most professors would be glad to have the help.

It depends on how you study. I didn't take a prep course, and I scored 330/340/5.5. However, I had a really good start and I am a disciplined study-er. If you feel like you need it, drop the money down. Some people really respond well to classes. If you're nervous with math, a good tutor could make a world of difference!

Take a break for a few days, and then do a bit more studying a few days before the exam. The day before, just chill out. The day of, go over a few math and vocab problems to calm your nerves. emmm is right--you've done all the hard work. Your brain won't fail you all of a sudden!

Don't ever give up your dreams for a man. You are still quite young and will undoubtedly still be able to find/create your 'dream family'. Your dream career needs to be built NOW. You can't do it after raising children. However, you may not get everything that you want. It will be very difficult to find another highly paid husband, work hard to get tenure, have children, be a young mother, AND have time to raise them/have your partner be at home with them. Understand that you will be trading your PhD for part of the dream family. Will you sacrifice your husband with an amazing job in order to have a husband who stays with the children? Will you sacrifice tenure to have more time with your family? Will you and your husband need to pay a nanny to stay with your children most of the time? Will you sacrifice tenure at a prestigious university to have children in your early thirties? There are a lot of things to think about, and I hope you make the right decision. Your boyfriend's rigidity on this issue gives me a great deal of pause; are you comfortable with this?

Your feelings are only human, and it's good that you're attempting to deal with them. Understand that your professor is not reflecting on YOUR abilities or place in the lab. The professor wants to build the lab up, and is excited that (YET ANOTHER, AFTER YOU) awesome student is joining! I would make sure to befriend this student and learn from them. View it as positive--this new hotshot student might be joining YOUR lab. It is so much better than having a terrible student, right?

NYU, because your location will be everything. Congrats on all of the AWESOME admits, by the way!!!

UC Irvine already had their visit. Please email the school. Best of luck!