Hey everyone,
I am freaking out and could definitely use some help.
I was accepted to a program (program #1) about six weeks ago. Over the next month, I decided I wanted to go there above most of the other programs I had yet to hear from. I had already been rejected from 4 or 5 schools. Program #1 offered me funding and gave me a courtesy deadline. I told them I wanted to come, even though I had a good chance of getting in to another program (program #2). I didn't think I wanted program #2.
Cut to a week later. I just got in to program #2 and I'm really upset for no reason. Program #1 is a much better fit in terms of interests, but that's not to say that program #2 is a bad fit. It's just not as good.
The other factors are not as clear-cut, though. Sure, I like the program and professors better at program #1, but it is located in a small city of 100,000 people. It's very far from home, I will know no one, and it's not in a desirable part of the country for me. I'm scared that if I go there, I will have no social life and be completely unhappy for 4 years. I'm also gay, so there's a good chance I'm going to be single my entire time there, which scares me because I'm at an age where I would really like to find love.
Program #2 is in one of the country's largest cities. It's more expensive to live in, and the money they are offering is not as good. It's about $1,400 more a year, but that does not make up for cost of living. There's also no health care (which program #1 offers) and funding is only for 3 years (versus 4 at program #1). That said, I feel that I'd be a lot happier in this city. It has culture, excitement, and a massive LGBT community. It is closer to home and flights are much cheaper. My friends would actually visit me.
Basically, I'm torn. But my question is not about which school to choose. It's this: can I even change my mind? I e-mailed that I accepted my offer to program #1 last week. Am I allowed to go back on that now? I'm not sure, as it's still before April 15. And I don't even know what I want to do. But I just want to know my options.
Has anyone ever accepted and then went back on their decision?