2019 Apps: Non-American Freaking Out

[beardedlady]

Hi all! I've been scouring the forum here, and decided to get over my disinclination to participate in online activities as I'm in dire need of application-anxiety camaraderie.

Non-American, from a non-English speaking country--this makes applications doubly crazy. My home university is good in relation to the region, but really a no-name internationally. My entire faculty have PhD's from top tier American/British uni's but since they rarely have students from our department apply to American grad schools, they are hard-pressed to really guide me through this insane process.

But, before I list my reasons for being on the brink of blowing a fuse, my application materials:

 

B.A. in Psych and English, GPA 94/100 (no 4 pt. scale here).

M.A. in English (have finished required courses, but still writing the thesis), GPA 96/100.

GRE: 167V/164Q/5W

TOEFL (computer based): 117 

I refuse to take the GRE Lit (money+time+unlikely to score well=not worth it).

LoR: going to have very strong recommendations from my two advisors plus another professor who's been incredibly enthusiastic about what he considers my exemplary academic abilities. They've also all known me for a good few years, as I've been in the same department for both B.A. (3 years) and M.A. (2 years). Downside is, my advisors--one is an emeritus prof. and the other a young associate prof. Not the best, but there's nothing I can do about it.

SoP: this is going ok, I guess, considering that however well-meaning they may be, the faculty members helping me have little insight into what the adcoms are looking for, or what the SoP should really be. I've done substantial research on this, but like nearly everyone else, I'm not very confident in what I'm doing. I have, though, given significant thought to the somewhat undefinable issue of "fit" and am applying only where there is some or significant research in my areas, and where there are at least two faculty members I'd be happyto work with.

WS: this has, somewhat weirdly, become a slight problem. I plan to use one of my thesis chapters, but since none of them are completed or have been thoroughly revised, and because I'm currently suffering a mild bout of anxiety-induced writer's block, it's not shaping up as well as I hoped, and I'm not as far along as I planned to be. Need to buck up and get at it, I know, but this whole process has touched the very core of my insecurities.

 

Extra fun stuff:

Awards/Scholarships:

• 2 departmental awards in English
• Full funding for my MA (tuition+stipend)
• Faculty of Humanities and Soc-Sci Dean's Prize (given 1% of thesis-track MA students in the faculty)
• Scholarship for undertaking research in American Lit-Culture program abroad (in Germany, where I'll be spending three months)

Research/Teaching:

• 3 years TA for undergrad English courses
• 2 years RA for English department
• 6 months RA for Psych department

Conferences:

• 2 small, regional conferences
• Waiting for response to abstracts I sent to a graduate conf. in Europe, and a big int'l conf. in Europe

 

Some of the problems:

• Since I'm not a US resident, I'm very hesitant to apply to State schools (although I will be applying to 2), as I gather they'll be less likely to accept me (it's not economical for them).
• Since I'm not taking the GRE Lit, this narrows down the list . I'm very wary of applying to schools that have only changed from "requiring" it to "highly recommending" it during this application season (e.g. Notre Dame and Rutgers). 
• I'm also only applying to programs that offer full funding, with TAships etc. guaranteed. 
• Though this is true in the U.S. as well, I feel like to be able to find a job back home after completing the PhD, I really need to go to a good, reputable school. Considering the life changes (moving across the world, uprooting my SO in the process, making it very difficult to start a family for 5-7 years, which is shitty, because if I get accepted, I'll start the program at 29, etc.) and the financial burden this whole process is incurring on my life, it also feels like the school/program needs to "justify" it. I've been working toward this goal since the second year of my undergrad, and I need to feel like if I take this leap toward a PhD in the States, I'm also giving myself the best chance for a future career in academia. I want to pursue a PhD in any case, just because I love what I do, but if I do it for fun then I'll stay at home to do so. So, bottom-line, I'm only applying to places in the U.S. that I think will increase my chances jump-starting an academic career.
• I'm terrified that adcoms will glimpse at my application, see that my school is completely unknown to them, and put my file aside. Especially coming from a non-English speaking country into an English dept...

 

So, these are the schools I'm applying to: Columbia, UPenn, Brown, UT Austin, Emory, NYU, U of Virginia, Rice, Washington University. On the "maybe" pile I have Rutgers, Duke, CUNY, and Chicago--which I cut down for various, and sometimes arbitrary reasons. I'm also applying to AmStudies at Yale (although I am a little nervous that, since my research focus would still be lit, they'll immediately chuck my app and wonder why I didn't apply to English). 

Broadly, my interests are queer theory, feminism, gender and sexuality, disability, and race--all in terms of how bodies are formed and represented; 20th/21st American/Brit women's writing, with a particular penchant for modernism (Woolf, Djuna Barnes, Gertrude Stein, Radclyffe Hall, etc.)

Any recommendations for good programs with a decent focus in these areas that I may have overlooked?

 

This has all been very lengthy, but it feels good to organize my thoughts.

Does anyone have any advice? Is there anyone out there in a similar situation?

And good luck to everyone else who's applying! May the odds be ever in our favor (I do feel slightly too old for this reference, I have to say, but I couldn't help myself).

 

 

[Indecisive Poet]

Hi @lit-TARDIS - I will let Grad Cafe-ers much more seasoned than I address the majority of your queries. But I'd just like to reassure you that no program will look at where you've done your undergrad or MA and throw your application out. I've been reassured by faculty everywhere I've talked to (Rutgers included if that helps) that no one on adcoms cares where someone did their BA or their MA -- in those exact words. They will care very much about your SoP and WS, and they will also hope you've gotten a decent GPA and GRE score. Similarly, I think your LoR situation is fine. They are all tenured or tenure-track, correct? As long as the letters are good, I don't think they will care very much if they're from associate, emeritus, or full professors.

FWIW, I have been looking through tons of program pages and browsing through current grad student portfolios, and many have done their undergrads at schools in the US I have never heard of and I've lived here my whole life.

Your interests sound like they will be well placed in almost any department as those are all very popular areas to be studying right now. Again, I'll let others comment on this, but I would suggest drawing up books, articles, journals you enjoy or have used in your research and seeing where those scholars work, or reading through faculty pages generally to see whose specific work within cultural studies and your historical fields you think is exciting.

[beardedlady]

Thanks @indecisivepoet for your reassuring response! I'm worried not just because of my university's (nonexistent) reputation, but because it's not an English-speaking institution (nor country), it may look especially suspect to the adcoms. I really hope you're right!

9 hours ago, indecisivepoet said:

They are all tenured or tenure-track, correct?

Yes, they are. I mean, I'm not sure emeritus status can be considered tenure, but she was a tenured faculty member since the 80's, and is still very active in the department despite technically retiring (i.e. opening a slot for new faculty by becoming emeritus) two years ago.

9 hours ago, indecisivepoet said:

I would suggest drawing up books, articles, journals you enjoy or have used in your research and seeing where those scholars work, or reading through faculty pages generally to see whose specific work within cultural studies and your historical fields you think is exciting

Thanks for the advice, this is in fact how I came to add Rice and George Washington to my list. I may do some more research again to see if I've missed any gems in my fields. 

Completely unrelated, but am I correct in understanding that you're currently studying in Scotland? I spent a month in Edinburgh a couple of years ago and absolutely adored it. I really wanted to apply to PhD programs in Scotland but the (lack of) funding nixed it for me, at least for now...

[joanhwlee]

6 hours ago, lit-TARDIS said:

I'm worried not just because of my university's (nonexistent) reputation, but because it's not an English-speaking institution (nor country), it may look especially suspect to the adcoms.

I wouldn't worry too much about coming from a non-English-speaking institution! I had also graduated from one when I was applying to Master's and PhD programs 2 years ago, and I was accepted to several Master's programs with funding/stipend and to one PhD program (but I opted for one of the Master's program in the end)! Granted, I had "studied abroad" in the US for a year as an undergraduate at a pretty reputable school and one of the professors there had written my LoR, but I really think that the "fit" of my SOP and WS is what got me in these programs! 

[Indecisive Poet]

9 hours ago, lit-TARDIS said:

Thanks @indecisivepoet for your reassuring response! I'm worried not just because of my university's (nonexistent) reputation, but because it's not an English-speaking institution (nor country), it may look especially suspect to the adcoms. I really hope you're right!

My strong guess is that they will look at your WS and SoP (and EFL scores?) and as long as those are at the English level they're looking for, they won't care if your institution isn't English-speaking. I've seen grad student profiles with backgrounds at universities in Asia, Turkey, Scandinavia, and other European countries.

9 hours ago, lit-TARDIS said:

Yes, they are. I mean, I'm not sure emeritus status can be considered tenure, but she was a tenured faculty member since the 80's, and is still very active in the department despite technically retiring (i.e. opening a slot for new faculty by becoming emeritus) two years ago.

I think as long as the letter makes clear in what capacity you worked together this won't be a problem. Was this person teaching you or advising you in some way?

9 hours ago, lit-TARDIS said:

Completely unrelated, but am I correct in understanding that you're currently studying in Scotland? I spent a month in Edinburgh a couple of years ago and absolutely adored it. I really wanted to apply to PhD programs in Scotland but the (lack of) funding nixed it for me, at least for now...

I am studying my MA at Edinburgh! I absolutely love the city (and the country) and am thrilled to be spending a year here. My program isn't funded, which was the right decision for me based on where I was coming from with my undergrad and my interests (and I worked full time through undergrad so I'm privileged enough to be able to leave the program with savings rather than debt). The lack of funding and the structure/ethos of PhD programs here keeps me from continuing in the UK, though -- I will also definitely be applying to all US-based PhD programs next year. I'm hoping my un-funded MA isn't a mark against me to adcoms but I've seen plenty of current grad student profiles with UK MAs so I'm not too worried.

[beardedlady]

3 hours ago, joanhwlee said:

I wouldn't worry too much about coming from a non-English-speaking institution! I had also graduated from one when I was applying to Master's and PhD programs 2 years ago, and I was accepted to several Master's programs with funding/stipend and to one PhD program (but I opted for one of the Master's program in the end)!

That's amazing! Thanks, it's reassuring to read of other internationals' success ?

[beardedlady]

1 hour ago, indecisivepoet said:

Was this person teaching you or advising you in some way?

Yes, she's known me since day one of my B.A. (Intro to Lit) and has since taught me another two or three courses, including an M.A. seminar. Plus she's one of my thesis advisors. That is, she's very familiar with my work as well as my personal attributes. I think the content of the LoR's are definitely going to be a strong point in my application in general.

 

1 hour ago, indecisivepoet said:

I'm hoping my un-funded MA isn't a mark against me to adcoms but I've seen plenty of current grad student profiles with UK MAs so I'm not too worried.

I honestly doubt that the adcoms care if the program is funded or not, and Edinburgh is a really high-ranking institution. I have this dream of doing a postdoc or something there. Plus I don't know why, but I really want to learn some Gaelic...

Thanks for all of your input!