get it in writing before declining another offer?

[mmsw86]

So, I've received two offers for full tuition and stipend. One of the schools has asked that I reply by April 2nd. The other has informed me of the financial award over the phone and said that the offer would come in writing soon. Should I make sure I have the second school's offer in writing before saying "no" to the other program (which would be my second choice)? Or should I just trust that what was said over the phone will come through? I mean, the professor I spoke with talked as if things were pretty much set/guaranteed, and it would be pretty bad if a school took an offer back. Right? Maybe I'm a little paranoid at this stage, but I don't want to pass up my second choice and then learn that my first choice isn't quite what I thought it was.

Thoughts?

Edited March 27, 2010 by mmsw86

[rising_star]

I would wait until I had it in writing.

[hellopsy]

Yes, I would wait until I get an official email or letter.

[mmsw86]

Okay. So do I ask for an extension from the one school? Or prod the other school to put everything in writing, letting them know that I'd like to decline other offers? NB Although this school is presently my first choice, there is the slightest possibility that another more attractive option might come through. Is it inappropriate to ask for an offer in writing if I can't make a commitment to the school right away?

[Jae B.]

I don't think it's inappropriate to ask for an offer in writing at any time. You can just call or e-mail them and asking for written documentation of your financial aid offer.

Even an e-mail describing the aid they're promising is better than nothing.

It's fine to ask for an extension, too. Especially if they're not providing anything in writing.

[mmsw86]

It's fine to ask for an extension, too. Especially if they're not providing anything in writing.

Thanks for your input, Jae B. I don't know that this makes any difference, but the school from which I'd be requesting an extension has provided the details of the award in writing. It's the other school (my current first choice) that hasn't. Sorry if that wasn't clear.

[juror#1]

I would ask for it in writing as well. You can even ask, when you email them, for a pdf of the offer that way you at least have a copy of it before it arrives in the mail. I know all of the schools sent me the letter via email before they sent it in the mail. If they are not able to do that, I don't think it would hurt to try asking for an extension from the other school. Good luck!

[georgica2]

So, I've received two offers for full tuition and stipend. One of the schools has asked that I reply by April 2nd. The other has informed me of the financial award over the phone and said that the offer would come in writing soon. Should I make sure I have the second school's offer in writing before saying "no" to the other program (which would be my second choice)? Or should I just trust that what was said over the phone will come through? I mean, the professor I spoke with talked as if things were pretty much set/guaranteed, and it would be pretty bad if a school took an offer back. Right? Maybe I'm a little paranoid at this stage, but I don't want to pass up my second choice and then learn that my first choice isn't quite what I thought it was.

Thoughts?

I'd absolutely wait to get it in writing from choice #1 before turning down choice #2. It would indeed be pretty bad if a program reneged on a verbal offer, but that doesn't mean it never happens. There's a reason why most schools stress that communications via email, phone, etc. with individual professors are unofficial and offers of admission/funding are only binding if they come from the graduate school/dean/whatever. It's unlikely that a professor would inform you of a funding offer unless it was solid, but there's always a possibility of funding not coming through for a variety of reasons outside of that particular professor's control (let's assume for the moment that a school/prof wouldn't be cruel enough to intentionally make an offer that was likely to fall through...) It may seem paranoid, but there's no reason to gamble.

I'd suggest first asking school #2 for an extension. April 15th is the commonly held reply date for a reason -- it allows all candidates to make informed decisions about where they're going, and prevents programs from strong-arming them into accepting offers before they're ready. I'd also call school #1 and ask if funding letters have been mailed. If they have, wait a day or two and see what happens. If not, I'd tell them that they're your absolute #1 choice and you're ready and willing to commit as soon as you have that letter in your hands, and ask if they'll give you something in writing (or at least when you'll get it.) If they're hesitant, it may be an indication that your funding offer isn't as definite as it was portrayed to be.

[mmsw86]

Thanks for the advice, everyone. I was told by my first-choice school that I'd receive something by email soon - maybe this week. I think I'll ask my second choice for an extension if I don't receive a letter/email by Wednesday. Depending on what sort of extension I get, I might have to politely nudge my first choice school.