Emailing professors: the f*&#?

[meghan_sparkle]

What the title says. Professors at several of the programs I have offers from have been emailing me; these notes range from short sweet and friendly to long, complimentary and effusive. All can be responded to with a quick few lines, sure, but a lot of them seem like invitations to further conversation and in an ideal world, that is exactly how I would take advantage of them. The problem? I'm baby.

For people who have been in this position before (as in, those who are current students now), how did you respond to these emails? As someone now in the position of having developed (or currently developing) a relationship with your supervisor and the rest of your committee, what advice would you give to yourself looking back about those early conversations? I think more than anything I'm looking for an attentive, tough-yet-caring mentorship with someone who will push me and not allow me to cut corners; the place that I get a feeling will offer me this best is probably where I'll end up—so tbh these convos are important, both over email now and in person at visit days. I would hate to look back on this and think, Oh my god, why didn't you pause Suits on Netflix and just spend some time on a half-decent damn email.

I know this sounds very basic but I'm a late-stage millennial; we're allergic to email. I know that people who have casual-yet-literate correspondences exist because I hang out with them sometimes. Sadly I'm not one of them. I learn best by example, but am probably not going to ask my older writer/professor friends to forward me their best professor/student emails for tips because omg cringe. Instead, I will ask the internet!!! Hit me!

[snorkles]

So this is the recruiting stage. This is a part of their job, and it doesn't necessarily reflect an immediate desire to develop a close relationship with you. It also doesn't not mean that, but I say this for others who may get caught up in the wonderful attention you'll be getting: Don't be surprised if you're left to your own devices once you actually begin the program. 

In terms of the emails, respond like a human is the easiest bit of advice. I preferred phone conversations, had they offered that option in the email. Ask about their mentoring style and department culture around that topic. Or ask about how they like living in whatever city. My conversations varied from talking about my work or their work to the structure of the program to general life things. You can pretty much ask whatever you like, but keep in mind that it's hard to read those conversations as more than exchanging niceties during the recruitment process. That said, I did vibe with the faculty at the program I chose more than others. It was an important factor for me, too. 

 

Edited February 28, 2020 by snorkles

[meghan_sparkle]

20 minutes ago, snorkles said:

So this is the recruiting stage. This is a part of their job, and it doesn't necessarily reflect an immediate desire to develop a close relationship with you. It also doesn't not mean that, but I say this for others who may get caught up in the wonderful attention you'll be getting: Don't be surprised if you're left to your own devices once you actually begin the program. 

In terms of the emails, respond like a human is the easiest bit of advice. I preferred phone conversations, had they offered that option in the email. Ask about their mentoring style and department culture around that topic. Or ask about how they like living in whatever city. My conversations varied from talking about my work or their work to the structure of the program to general life things. You can pretty much ask whatever you like, but keep in mind that it's hard to read those conversations as more than exchanging niceties during the recruitment process. That said, I did vibe with the faculty at the program I chose more than others. It was an important factor for me, too. 

 

this is an important reality check, thank you! i grew up in a cold WASPy household so any attention or warmth from mentor figures has me practically screaming "MOMMY" so i really do need to remind myself that this is just recruiting and should be taken w/a grain of salt lol

[snorkles]

8 minutes ago, meghan_sparkle said:

this is an important reality check, thank you! i grew up in a cold WASPy household so any attention or warmth from mentor figures has me practically screaming "MOMMY" so i really do need to remind myself that this is just recruiting and should be taken w/a grain of salt lol

But also enjoy it! Everyone has earned this attention, and I think it's important to indulge it. They do want to recruit you and potentially work with you. It is, however, part of the job. So enjoy but don't develop unrealistic expectations out of it. 

Also, response emails don't need to be effusive. There's no reason to sell yourself anymore. (Though I have heard some horror stories about odious students turning off faculty, so don't be that person!). 

[meghan_sparkle]

1 minute ago, snorkles said:

(Though I have heard some horror stories about odious students turning off faculty, so don't be that person!). 

I ... hope not to be!

[Glasperlenspieler]

I'd echo @snorkles but also add that you should remember that at this stage of the game, you are evaluating them. They've already accepted you and decided they want you to come (barring some unlikely horror story). So you're job now is to figure out if you like them. So, be yourself, ask questions, and keep your eyes open for signs (good and bad).