aspiringdoc Posted April 15, 2008 Posted April 15, 2008 Would you choose a great program but far from your spouse (requiring a flight) OR A good-ish program that is much closer to him/her (driveable in a couple of hours)? I am afraid to take the latter over the former, but I really want to... But what if I regret it and can't find a job in 5 years?? Ahhh!!!
yticnineb Posted April 15, 2008 Posted April 15, 2008 I'd probably take the latter. Who has the more "portable" degree, though?
luvalicious Posted April 15, 2008 Posted April 15, 2008 It's hard to do it without overanalyzing - I don't know what makes one great and one good-ish - but I'd choose great. I've settled regarding education/career for a relationship before, and the less than happiness resulting from that bled over into the rest of my life.
portafoy Posted April 15, 2008 Posted April 15, 2008 I would definitely take the former. But that may depend on how long you've been together. In fact, I'm enrolling in a program in Chicago while I live in Houston. My SO is staying here and we're going to fly back and forth for a year and if it doesn't work, then she'll move to Chicago with me. But partly this is driven by the fact that we have a house and family in Houston. The presumption is I'll be pretty busy while I'm in school, and her family ties (being very tight) will keep her from missing me too much.
teyocoyani Posted April 16, 2008 Posted April 16, 2008 Umm...we're not talking girlfriend/boyfriend here...we're talking SPOUSE as in "wife/husband"...My husband and I deliberated over this situation recently and came to the conclusion that whatever decision we made, it would be the best for our marriage and help our careers. In any case, this can only be decided by the two of you and I trust that in the end, you'll both agree to what's right for you as a partnership. Best wishes!
rising_star Posted April 16, 2008 Posted April 16, 2008 I'd take the former. You'll regret him/her and the decision if you take the latter.
vivalavirago Posted April 16, 2008 Posted April 16, 2008 It depends on how long your program is... If it's only a year or two, go with the former.
aspiringdoc Posted April 16, 2008 Author Posted April 16, 2008 It's a full phd program, so 5-6 years...
aspiringdoc Posted April 16, 2008 Author Posted April 16, 2008 I haven't decided yet, I just got funding from both so they gave me two extra days to decide...
someone Posted April 16, 2008 Posted April 16, 2008 Take the latter. It's ok if being near your spouse to be important to you! If the great program is not really exciting to you you'll probably do better at the goodish one.
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