LOR Words of Encouragement

[darlindukkie]

LOR Encouragement

Hello everyone! I thought I’d offer this bit of encouragement since I’m sure there’s someone out there who is struggling to meet their letter of rec requirements for their applications.

I’ve been working for the past two years in the field I want to study, so getting professional letters wasn’t a big concern (except for the whole “do I or don’t I tell my boss?” freakout). However, getting an academic letter has been a big concern for me because I did not form any relationships with any of my professors. I graduated in 2009, and attended a large research university with 19,000 undergrads. I did well as an undergraduate, so I never really felt the need to stay for office hours, and I transferred a lot of AP and IB credits, planned my courses well and completed my degree in 3 years.

Attempt no. 1: I contacted a professor that had complimented my work, even though I only had one class with him. I took a small class with him, contributed to class discussion quite a bit, and figured this guy was as good a reference as I was going to get. I emailed him, waited a week and followed up. I still haven’t heard back from him.

Attempt no. 2: I looked through my transcripts for other classes I did well in, and decided to email a professor with whom I took two upper-division classes. His classes were really hard, and the only way to get an A was to produce well-researched papers and mid-terms. I didn’t email him first because I’ve literally never spoken to him.

At first he emailed back and said that he wasn’t comfortable writing for someone he didn’t know and asked me to stop by his office. I work full-time and live 5 hours away, so I can’t just swing by his office on the fly. I reply and let him know that I can make a visit within the next week, he replies he’ll be out of the country fron Nov. 1 – dec. 9, but that he’ll write me a letter from Italy. Uhhh….what am I supposed to make out of that?! A couple of days later he emails me back and says that my resume, statement and papers from his class are impressive. He will write me a good letter, and regrets that he didn’t get to know me. Super sweet of him, and I’m super relieved.

Long story short: You can’t control who will and who will not write you a letter, so focus on the things you can control. If you’ve worked hard and done what you need to do, then your resume, statement of purpose, and past academic work will speak for themselves. Focus your energies on improving your resume and statement, so your professor can say, wow, I would like them working for me! I know I lucked out with this professor being receptive and reliable, but giving up isn’t going to get you what you need.

Are there recommenders who you can shamelessly say “I need your letter to kick ass”? If so, tell them! I’m really comfortable with one of my recommenders and told him that I needed his letter to make me sound like I walk on water. He smiled, and said, “OK”.

Don’t give up, and if LORs are holding you back, then accept that it’s the weak point of your application and improve another area!

[butterfingers2010]

Thanks for the encouragement darlindukkie! I had quite a hard time finding a third LOR as well. I thought I had great choices for references, but most of them did not pan out. My top two choices for the third letter did not respond to my inquires at all, and I thought that I was out of options, since I felt I did not know many of my other professors well enough to ask. I sent out a few e-mails to professors who I thought would at least remember me, and I was pleasantly surprised by an old psychology professor who agreed to write my letter, even though I had only one class with him and rarely spoke with him outside of it. As luck would have it he wanted me to write my own letter and he happens to be the head of the counseling department at my alma matter (I am not applying to his grad program, btw. It doesn't quite fit my interests) so I feel like I pretty much won the golden ticket as far as LOR's go, since I got to put exactly what I wanted in my letter.

My advice to people out there who are still struggling with this is to keep asking, and keep asking, and keep asking until you get a "yes"! Surely you had at least a few professors, supervisors,etc. who are both reliable and willing to write on your behalf. It can be a frustrating process, and you definitely feel like its a bit of a blow to your ego, but if grad school is what you really want...it is all worth it in the end.

[R_Izzle2]

Why is it that 2/3 recommenders are fine, and respond to your requests immediately and you always have to chase down that elusive 3rd recommender? Thanks for the encouragement, because I'm sitting here pulling out my hair!