Does it matter if you were a "First Pick" or not?

[CarlieE]

Hi All,

After perusing the forum and seeing what everyone's posting, I found myself wondering how everyone feels about being, or not being one of the top picks for their program.

I mean, we're all happy to have gotten offers, but what if you weren't first string? Or if you know you were wait listed and now you're in because someone else dropped out? Has that affected your decision about accepting at that program, or affected you otherwise ie. self-esteem? Do you think it's affected your funding, or you chance to negotiate for more funding? Has it prevented you from *asking* for more money, or asking questions?

Do you think you'll get less attention once you begin the program? Do you think you'll try harder to do well once you begin?

For those who are still wait listed, how has knowing you were wait listed make you feel?

Just thought this might be a good place to get out some mixed/bad/confused feelings and thoughts.

[LinguisticMystic]

Not to me, no. I was waitlisted at my top-choice program. If they're able to extend me an offer, I'll gladly accept & I wouldn't foresee giving them a reason to be disappointed in me. Being waitlisted isn't making me feel less confident in my abilities. And that's that. I guess I'm not shocked that other people were top picks before me. Not that I suck, of course, but why shouldn't there be applicants more ideal than me?

If I did think I were perfect, maybe I'd be a little more worked up over it. Then again, I'm switching fields & have a mediocre GPA. Hah, so I'm far from being the "perfect candidate" (on paper).

[wheatGrass]

I'm totally going through this.

One university--my first offer--said I was in their top five and they loved me and gave me a little extra money. (A)

At another, I applied for two programs: B, which I felt was an excellent fit; and C, which I felt was an OK fit, but which seemed a more logical flow from my previous degree if you did not bother to read my SOP, LOR, or writing sample. I met with a prof from B, who seemed really positive about my admission.

I was surprised when I got admitted to C and only waitlisted for B. So I sent my POI an email just asking if I were to go to C, or A for that matter (same geographical area) could I still take courses at B or have committee members from B. She called me and told me she would get me an offer for B within a few days, if I really thought that B was better than C for me. So, I said I thought it was... making only a passing mention of still considering A...

So of course I said that I thought B was better for me than C... I really do.... but that's not considering A!

Now I'm off the waiting list (what kind of process is this, anyway???) but I'm not even sure I want to go to B. I feel horribly that she's gone to some effort to do this for me.... I really wasn't expecting this response when I emailed her with my question about taking one or two courses.

She's written about all the exciting opportunities at B and possibilities for extra (interesting) RA work, etc... but I can't help feeling that if they thought I was so great, why didn't they let me in in the first place? This all happened within 48 hours of the first round of offers being mailed. I can't imagine they've had people drop off the list so quickly. It is so strange.

[emmm]

No . . . I think a lot of factors are taken into consideration when offers are made to applicants and funding also comes into play. You have to accept that programs have MANY well-qualified applicants, and there is probably no significant difference in capabilities between those that get offers right away and those that are very high up on the waitlist. However, some applicants may seem to be better fits in terms of who on the faculty has funding. The committee is probably trying to predict which labs a given student might be interested in based on their past experiences and stated interests from the SOP. But it's all guesswork. And even if they guess right, lots of students discover new interests during rotations (that's what they're for, after all). Not being a "first pick" does not mean that they think you are inferior in any way. If they offer you a spot, they think you'll do well and they will treat you just the same as any other student.

Edited March 28, 2012 by emmm

[Pitangus]

Not exactly the same situation, but I was "second string" for the college fellowship I received.

I get the self-esteem thing, really I do. I thought I was competitive for the fellowship and was discouraged when I didn't make the cut. But now, I have it, and that's great. It really doesn't matter to me that others were offered it before I was.

Most people will have no idea when you got your offer. And the few who were involved in the admissions process have dealt with so many applicants that I seriously doubt they are going to remember your acceptance timeline for the rest of your time in the department. And that timeline may not really reflect your perceived potential anyways, as emmm suggests.

In the end, if they accepted you, they want you. I'm sure they rejected plenty of qualified applicants, waitlisted or not. I wouldn't dismiss a program, fellowship, or anything just because I wasn't the top/earliest pick. I wouldn't want to deprive myself of options.

[wildviolet]

I completely agree with Pitangus on this one.

When I found myself on the wait-list, I didn't feel so great at first. But (after asking about it here on GC and talking with some friends), I realized that there many more qualified applicants than spots available. I mean, my potential adviser could probably accept only one, maybe two, new PhD students. So, the fact that he chose somebody else over me doesn't diminish my self-confidence--at least he chose me as an alternate and didn't outright reject me!

Anyway, I'm happy to have received a scholarship at another university with equally amazing faculty in my field. So, I guess it all works out in the end. I'm of the mind that what happens happens for a reason, even if it initially seems like a bad thing.

[waitinginvain?]

I'm not sure if I'm even on the waitlist! But based on my posts, another poster said I was, so I'll assume I am. I have mixed feelings about it. I graduated summa cum laude with a 3.84 GPA. I've had one of my plays published and many more read/produced in New York, Los Angeles, Seattle, etc.. I was invited to take an independent study course in playwriting by the professor who heads the committee deciding whether or not to admit me to the dramatic writing MFA program. (I applied at my alma mater.) So, I take the "rejection" personally. I can't help but wonder what I did wrong while I was an undergrad. Or is it something else: My personality? My age? (I'm 50.) My gender? My sexual preference? My pride makes me want to tell them to shove it up their @sses. I don't NEED a degree to write plays.

On the other hand, I'm not going to pass up what may be my last chance to go to grad school to fulfill my dream of having an MFA in dramatic writing. So I'm willing to swallow my pride to get what I want out of life. In the end, no one (except me) will know that I wasn't their top choice. And who knows, given the chance, I may end up being the best student there.

[Skweeder]

To be honest it's my first round as an MFA applicant and as an international student (who apply in USA) with a significant other it's a big pressure not to be a "top pick" not because of pride or anything but simply because of funding and the aftermath of such sacrifice... theres also a limit to how much sacrifice a couple can endure for one of the partner's dream: the idea of fully self fund my MFA gives us a huge shiver down the spine... as price bracket regarding loan expectancy and capacity to repay is very different from country to country it's near impossible to pay if your not a "top pick": 57000$US a year and more from one's own pocket for an MFA is practically a career leap of faith... attached to a huge boulder.

If being "top pick" wasn't linked to finance I guess most of us wouldn't even care (I know I won't... I'm actually really happy I got in: but will decline because I've been told I shouldn't expect a penny even on need-based basis as an international student... that actually killed it for me).

Thus being "top pick" in my mind doesn't even guarantee your career as an artist as a see further down the road it means having less loan to repay, less interest to repay and more time to make some kickass art. Which is what being "top pick" insure in my mind: more time post MFA on my art career. Thus getting that "full ride" thing has a lot more perks than an ego trip after the MFA... I don't really care about marginal value frankly: My art will suffer more if I was in debt and have to neglect it working full shift at the McDo. Personally, i'd rather steer away from an MFA for which I'm a bottom tier candidate with 0 funding and concentrate for next year.

But I also think that faculty won't look at you as a lesser artist if you've been wait listed, you got in without a scholarship or anything: they simply want all their students to succeed even if your the underdog... As an artist i'd rather be more stressed and anxious if I was the "golden boy" of the faculty.

Edited March 28, 2012 by Skweeder

[waitinginvain?]

Skweeder: $57000 a semester? Do you mean $5700?

[Skweeder]

Skweeder: $57000 a semester? Do you mean $5700?

more like a year Fall + Winter... tuition and whatnot: the paper they gave me showed that 57 536$ a year (Fall/Spring 15 credit term...MFA studio total)... If we were in Canada it could be around 5700 tuition per semester and much lower in Quebec!

[contretemps]

I think what matters is that you get accepted to YOUR first pick. Me, I'm just glad I got in.