"Oh, don't worry. You'll get a job. You have a PhD!"

[juilletmercredi]

Is anyone one continually frustrated and angered by family and friends saying things like this?

I'm in my fourth year of a PhD program, and naturally I'm thinking about the job market since I will be on it in the fall. I'm in a social science field that is kind of in the middle - not overflowing with jobs, but not bad either. I'm planning to do a postdoc and then apply for academic positions, or maybe research positions instead/in addition. I've also entertained the idea of acquiring a practical degree that's very related to my research - I do research on mental health and it is one that would allow me to practice - but I'm just toying with it. I'm a very risk-averse person, and the idea of having no job and struggling makes me very anxious.

Anyway, whenever I try to bring up these anxieties with friends and family, I keep getting the wholly frustrating response in my subject line. They seem to think that employment is perfectly correlated with education, and that having a PhD means that you'll automatically get whatever job you want. I've mostly given up trying to explain the vagaries of the academic job market because the next statement is always "Don't worry, you're so smart!" I was the "nerd/smart one" in the family, so it's only natural for them to think I am some sort of special case, but *everyone* on the market was an above-average kid in school.

I know that they are just trying to make me feel better, but they actually make me feel worse because I'm not getting any real help for my anxiety. I know that I am a worrier and I experience higher levels of anxiety than most, so perhaps I am barking up the wrong tree and should see a therapist (again). But is anyone else frustrated by family being blindly optimistic when you know the truth?

[go3187]

My parents are similar, in that they can't imagine I might end up not getting a postdoc, not working in academia, or not even having a job in astrophysics. This isn't only my impostor syndrome surfacing; jobs in astrophysics are just incredibly hard to get at this point. However, I remind myself that my family doesn't really understands what I do. There was this funny picture shared by a friend on FB, which made a similar point:

Asking my parents to "get" how challenging is going to be to find an astrophysics job is... well, a little too much, and probably unnecessary too.

Now, does it bother me? Yes and no. It's not their attitude that's really the problem, I think, but my fear of what they'll think if I don't make it, if they will be faced with the fact that I might not be quite as smart/amazing as they think I am. (As an aside, I'm dealing with a very similar issue in another aspect of my life, and I'm seeing someone at the university's counseling center to get some help with it.)

[ktel]

I often get annoyed with my boyfriend for this, when I'm freaking out and he says "Don't worry you'll be fine!". Half the time he's right, but for some reason it really bothers me when he says that. I know he's trying to be supportive but it feels like empty advice. Similarly, his dad's fiancee is doing a PhD in a business/social science field, and bless her heart she often tries to relate to me, but what we do and the way we do it could not be more different! So I just have to sit there and nod. Their intentions are good. Sure, they don't quite get it, but that's OK, they don't need to get it. It's not like them understanding exactly what you're doing is going to help that much.

[Behavioral]

As someone doing their PhD in a business/social science field, I have a lot of respect for you in STEM disciplines.

[robot_hamster]

I don't really have issues with family saying stuff like this. What annoys me is when people at school say stuff like that. Professors, career advisers, etc. I'm working on my masters, but as I approach the completion of my program I grow more and more worried. I have been looking at jobs for the last 6 months or more. No luck. It scares the crap out of me!

[ArtHistoryandMuseum]

Tangent but related: I questioned my mom (who has two BAs) on a detail for my taxes, and she replied, you should be able to figure it out, you have your master's degree!

Yes, mom, I hold a MA, but not in employment law!

People assume those with advanced degrees are smart in everything. We may know a lot, and in detail, but a couple of years doesn't imbue us with all knowledges of all the world. Nor does the process automatically provide us a job. PhD may be one credential necessary, but there is so more to the process of applying, interviewing, and accepting work.

[ndez]

My parents are similar, in that they can't imagine I might end up not getting a postdoc, not working in academia, or not even having a job in astrophysics. This isn't only my impostor syndrome surfacing; jobs in astrophysics are just incredibly hard to get at this point. However, I remind myself that my family doesn't really understands what I do. There was this funny picture shared by a friend on FB, which made a similar point:

Asking my parents to "get" how challenging is going to be to find an astrophysics job is... well, a little too much, and probably unnecessary too.

Now, does it bother me? Yes and no. It's not their attitude that's really the problem, I think, but my fear of what they'll think if I don't make it, if they will be faced with the fact that I might not be quite as smart/amazing as they think I am. (As an aside, I'm dealing with a very similar issue in another aspect of my life, and I'm seeing someone at the university's counseling center to get some help with it.)

This is very interesting go3187. Look at this article. According to them astronomy grads are one of the best off majors:

http://www.bundle.com/article/college-majors-high-unemployment-rates/?frommsn=true

This shows how ignorant they can be while writing this articles.

[TakeruK]

That article was based on a Wall Street Journal publication of US Census data. It shows that 0.0% of people with astronomy majors in their bachelor's degree are unemployed. That may be true but that doesn't include all the information!

Firstly, I think employed on the census simply means "have a job", not necessarily meaning working in astronomy -- it could be a McDonalds worker and still count. In addition, you can see the popularity rank of each major -- Astronomy is very near the bottom. In fact, almost all of the low popularity majors have 0.0% unemployment rates. I am thinking this means there aren't a lot of astronomy majors in the census so it could be a low number statistics effect too!

Both the image macro and the WSJ article were circulated through our department, it was amusing at least

[go3187]

This is very interesting go3187. Look at this article. According to them astronomy grads are one of the best off majors:

http://www.bundle.co...s/?frommsn=true

This shows how ignorant they can be while writing this articles.

Other than what TakeruK wrote, I'd be curious to know if they considered people who only have a college degree, or those with a graduate degree too. It's essentially impossible to get a job in astrophysics without a PhD.

Anyway, I don't know anyone who majored in astrophysics and is not unemployed. Most people I know just don't have jobs in astrophysics.

[imonedaful]

I get this all the time from people in regards to having an MBA. "You have an MBA, you should have some fancy Wall Street job, no problem." That is not how it works. I often tell people "you know who hired a lot of smart MBA students straight out of graduate school? Enron. You see where that got them. Do you think corporations are going to jump on hiring somebody fresh out of graduate school?" In response I get *blank stare*. With increase in people going to college and the decrease in jobs on the market it is competitive for everybody. Nothing is a guarantee.

[comp12]

This is an article to show the next person that says this to you: http://chronicle.com/article/From-Graduate-School-to/131795/

[differentDemocrat]

education means nothing to this country. Sometimes I feel like I'm wasting my time and more importantly money on College.

[michigan girl]

What angers me more is when family ask how come I have not found stable employment yet. "But you have an advanced degree! Are you not speaking up in interviews?".

Relatives believe there is something wrong with me rather than the bad economy.

[ANDS!]

education means nothing to this country. Sometimes I feel like I'm wasting my time and more importantly money on College.

This poster means CERTAIN education. Not all degree's are created equal.

[Chukwu Chucks]

I remember reading an article in Yahoo news about this PhD graduate who lives off food stamp.....PhD in history

I forget the name of the poor fella

[manoj9585]

Hello, i haven't a degree of PhD. I have complete my b-tech from Rajasthan technical university , but i did't get job do you have a job regarding software engg..

[LadyRara]

This makes me afraid. Very afraid.