Kinda scared about my first semester of coursework. Normal?

[cokohlik]

I saw my first ever graduate seminar syllabus today. My first thought was "holy crap, that is a lot of reading," followed by "thankfully, reading is easy," followed by an unnerving feeling when I reached the end of the syllabus that discussed requirements for the final paper. I have no problem reading or writing papers or coming up with ideas, but it seems like I'll have a heck of a time figuring out proper formatting and things like that. I'm not sure what style my department prefers (my guess is Chicago). I'm also worried about endnotes (which were specifically mentioned in the paper requirements and I'm told this isn't uncommon for the dept.). This might sound stupid, but What on earth is an endnote? I mean, I know what endnotes are, technically -- at the end of papers, discussing little details that would be good for your readers to know, sources, and things of that nature, but I've never actually written an endnote myself so I have no idea how they're generally structured or why I personally would need them. I try not to put superfluous information in my papers and although reading endnotes has been useful when reading others' scholarly works, I never actually wrote them for my undergrad papers. I did use footnotes that basically just had bibliographic citation information, but my guess is that this isn't the same thing as a "real" endnote. I've literally spent the last hour on Google trying to discern how endnotes differ from footnotes (is it just that one is in the footer and one is at the end of text?), which makes me feel really, reallystupid. I'm not worried about the amount of reading or even the fact that final papers are usually research papers. All of this is second nature. I don't know why, though, I am so worried about formatting. Perhaps it's because my undergrad art history department didn't really care what formatting you used as long as you were consistent. Perhaps it's because once, I was 1 point away from a perfect score on a health sciences paper just because my margins weren't exactly 1.25" despite how much I tried to fix them and restructure my footnotes (thanks, Word). Or maybe it's because I'm worried that I'll fail (i.e., "get anything less than an A[-]") on my papers and lose all my funding by the second semester because I can't format my writing properly. Sigh.

I'm also concerned about what exactly a graduate level seminar sounds like, with regards to student-to-student discussion. I've always thought that I could just be myself in discussions and not have to strive to sound/act/speak certain ways. I assume that this is the same for graduate study, but I also assume that I'll have one professor and ten students judging the merit of what I'm saying (to decide about future funding. Again. Even though fellow students have nothing to do with funding, I don't think.) This sounds silly as a write it, and I know it is. The department and I will get along famously, I'm sure. But I just have to let out all these unhealthy thoughts in a safe place....

I suppose I won't really know any of this until I actually get to the first day of classes.

Thanks for listening to my stream-of-consciousness, anxiety-wracked post about endnotes (sorry).

[Sigaba]

C--

Please take a look at this It might have information that you'll find useful.

[cokohlik]

C--

Please take a look at this It might have information that you'll find useful.

Ahh! Thank you.

[oswic]

cokohlik, I see you're in the humanities. Graduate Study for the 21st Century: How to Build an Academic Career in the Humanities by Gregory Colon Semenza was recommended in the History thread and I have been finding it useful. He lays out what to expect as a PhD student in the humanities - everything from seminar papers and oral reports to submitting conference papers to publishing to developing a personal organization system. He empowers the grad student by explaining the culture of humanities graduate departments and mapping out an ideal route to tenure. Of course there is no perfect model and experiences are ultimately individualized, but knowing what to expect (as much as possible) helps to keep focused on larger goals, rather than getting caught up in the smaller details. I wish I'd had this book before I began my MA program. Good luck!

Edited April 20, 2012 by oswic

[StrangeLight]

i would add that knowing how to format your paper should be the least of your worries. it's a technical question with a very concrete answer. end notes aren't necessarily points of discussion. they're the author/year/page references for the information you cite in your paper. occasionally, you'll want to expand on an idea in an end note rather than in the body of the essay because it will help with flow and because the information is somewhat extraneous to your argument. but if you turn in papers where every end note is simply author, date, page number, you're not doing anything wrong.

also, the reading will not be easy. you are assigned a higher caliber of works at the graduate level. books that are too complex or theoretically rigorous to be included even in upper level undergrad seminars. i say this only so that, when you start reading, you don't freak out if it's harder to understand. it's not you... the books ARE harder.

as for how to discuss things in a grad seminar, i like to go with the spirit of generosity. even if you don't like a book, even if you think an argument is "wrong" or misguided, know that your professor assigned it because they think it has something of value for you to learn. approach the readings with the questions: what is this author trying to tell me? how do they go about making their argument? do i find their methodology convincing? unfortunately, a lot of students who love to argue think the purpose of the seminar is to rip apart books for everything they should have done but failed to do. this is a bad approach. instead, try to ask yourself what each text is contributing to your field. if these are the kinds of comments you can raise in discussion, you'll do just fine.

[wheatGrass]

I am also terrified. To make things worse, I went to a graduate student seminar at a conference recently and felt totally out of water. I was the only person there who hadn't yet begun his or her program; most people were actually at the proposal stage and could talk so eloquently not only about their projects, but others' as well. I guess I should feel happy that I was accepted to attend, but I just didn't feel like I could ask a relevant question or contribute anything worthwhile to the discussion. It left me feeling really crappy about my abilites. (Things did get better at the conference, when I got to sessions with people whose interests are more directly aligned with my own).

I am coming from a very small MA program into quite a selective PhD program. I feel like I really need to practice taking risks in academic discussions so that I don't get completely overwhelmed by all the more experienced people in my new program.

[cokohlik]

cokohlik, I see you're in the humanities. Graduate Study for the 21st Century: How to Build an Academic Career in the Humanities by Gregory Colon Semenza was recommended in the History thread and I have been finding it useful. He lays out what to expect as a PhD student in the humanities - everything from seminar papers and oral reports to submitting conference papers to publishing to developing a personal organization system. He empowers the grad student by explaining the culture of humanities graduate departments and mapping out an ideal route to tenure. Of course there is no perfect model and experiences are ultimately individualized, but knowing what to expect (as much as possible) helps to keep focused on larger goals, rather than getting caught up in the smaller details. I wish I'd had this book before I began my MA program. Good luck!

Thank you oswic! I've been picking my way through Robert L. Peters Getting What You Came For, which is helpful, but I can never be too prepared so I'll be checking out your recommendation

[cokohlik]

i would add that knowing how to format your paper should be the least of your worries. it's a technical question with a very concrete answer. end notes aren't necessarily points of discussion. they're the author/year/page references for the information you cite in your paper. occasionally, you'll want to expand on an idea in an end note rather than in the body of the essay because it will help with flow and because the information is somewhat extraneous to your argument. but if you turn in papers where every end note is simply author, date, page number, you're not doing anything wrong.

also, the reading will not be easy. you are assigned a higher caliber of works at the graduate level. books that are too complex or theoretically rigorous to be included even in upper level undergrad seminars. i say this only so that, when you start reading, you don't freak out if it's harder to understand. it's not you... the books ARE harder.

as for how to discuss things in a grad seminar, i like to go with the spirit of generosity. even if you don't like a book, even if you think an argument is "wrong" or misguided, know that your professor assigned it because they think it has something of value for you to learn. approach the readings with the questions: what is this author trying to tell me? how do they go about making their argument? do i find their methodology convincing? unfortunately, a lot of students who love to argue think the purpose of the seminar is to rip apart books for everything they should have done but failed to do. this is a bad approach. instead, try to ask yourself what each text is contributing to your field. if these are the kinds of comments you can raise in discussion, you'll do just fine.

Thank you so much! I don't know why the endnote thing freaked me out so much. I've started to take note of scholars' endnotes and it seems fairly simple but for some reason the thought of actually writing these is intimidating. I think I'll get the hang of it once I write my first graduate paper and get feedback on it. Maybe I'll even be required to turn in rough drafts -- which would be so helpful but I doubt profs have time to read graduate level rough drafts.

I've started to read ahead of time for some of my coursework and the things I'd like to research. Luckily, what I've read so far is challenging but not overbearingly difficult. I'm not sure who to thank for that but I fully expect the readings to become difficult once school starts and I get the real reading list (I'm going off my own intuition and past semesters' syllabi right now, which is a frustrating method because many of the readings are online through a proxy that I can't access and of course the readings only exist online within this one website!) I think the hardest part for me will be vocalizing my thoughts during discussion. I tend to clam up because I'm either so excited by an idea that I mentally trip over myself, or I'm intimidated by the intelligence of my fellow classmates so I end up stuttering and speaking non-coherently (or so I think).

[Sigaba]

i would add that knowing how to format your paper should be the least of your worries. it's a technical question with a very concrete answer. end notes aren't necessarily points of discussion. they're the author/year/page references for the information you cite in your paper. occasionally, you'll want to expand on an idea in an end note rather than in the body of the essay because it will help with flow and because the information is somewhat extraneous to your argument. but if you turn in papers where every end note is simply author, date, page number, you're not doing anything wrong.

I would say that it depends upon who is reading and evaluating a piece, and also what field. I've had professors who read the footnotes/endnotes first. And I've read reviews in scholarly journals in which the reviewer complain about a writer resorting to a "garland of ibids."

IMO, a way to manage one's risk is to learn the format for your field like the back of your hand and to not take shortcuts.

My $0.02

Edited April 25, 2012 by Sigaba

[Dal PhDer]

Hi there,

I think the first thing you should realize is this - you are feeling exactly like 95% of all the other students that will be in your class!

Try not to worry about formatting- this is something, like other have said, that you can easily accomplish. Graduate school is all about becoming an independent thinker, synthesizing materials, and learning how to convey your opinions/thoughts in a professional manner.

Readings: There will be a lot...and you will be expected to do more than 'just' read. You will have to really understand and think beyond the page....criticize the work, think about the benefits, limitations, and future directions...I even brought in additional papers for my classes (the students hated me, but for me, it was connecting ideas and expanding my understanding of the topic)...try not to look at just the readings week by week, but try and connect them, and bring that into class.

Class: My classes were very much like seminars in the fact that they were mostly discussion base. At first, it will be intimidating to speak up and talk...but force yourself, and you will find it comes easier and easier. Don't worry about questions you have, or if you think your ideas are off...I always think it's important to show that you think outside the box, and can support your opinions. Also, I think it's important to sometimes question what you're given...not every professor will give you readings that they think are the gold standard- some will want to challenge you and how you think

Seminars: My seminars were student presentations and discussions. It's hard not to feel intimidated and nervous during these periods (we all do), but look at it as a learning experience in a friendly environment. Engage and participate- the more you do, the more comfortable you will become. Take opportunities to get feedback on your work from your peers- and collaborate! This is what the experience is all about!

Coursework: I would recommend always meeting with your professor to discuss your final research paper. I don't know about your department/field..but often times, professors will look at drafts and give feedback. Take that opportunity to get the feedback and advice, so you can know exactly what they expect. Also, hook up with other students...peer feedback is great- but reviewing others work is a great opportunity for you to learn and will help your own writing.

Overall: remember that you're just heading into grad school..you're not expected to know everything! this is a learning experience! be open, and take every opportunity to engage with your peers and professors. Don't be afraid to speak- remember, 99% of the people there want you to be successful! They don't want you to crash and burn- so think of it as a friendly environment!

Don't be scared- be excited! it's common to be nervous, but try and think about how amazing, rich, and fun it will be

Edited April 26, 2012 by Dal PhDer

[cokohlik]

Hi there,

I think the first thing you should realize is this - you are feeling exactly like 95% of all the other students that will be in your class!

Try not to worry about formatting- this is something, like other have said, that you can easily accomplish. Graduate school is all about becoming an independent thinker, synthesizing materials, and learning how to convey your opinions/thoughts in a professional manner.

Readings: There will be a lot...and you will be expected to do more than 'just' read. You will have to really understand and think beyond the page....criticize the work, think about the benefits, limitations, and future directions...I even brought in additional papers for my classes (the students hated me, but for me, it was connecting ideas and expanding my understanding of the topic)...try not to look at just the readings week by week, but try and connect them, and bring that into class.

Class: My classes were very much like seminars in the fact that they were mostly discussion base. At first, it will be intimidating to speak up and talk...but force yourself, and you will find it comes easier and easier. Don't worry about questions you have, or if you think your ideas are off...I always think it's important to show that you think outside the box, and can support your opinions. Also, I think it's important to sometimes question what you're given...not every professor will give you readings that they think are the gold standard- some will want to challenge you and how you think

Seminars: My seminars were student presentations and discussions. It's hard not to feel intimidated and nervous during these periods (we all do), but look at it as a learning experience in a friendly environment. Engage and participate- the more you do, the more comfortable you will become. Take opportunities to get feedback on your work from your peers- and collaborate! This is what the experience is all about!

Coursework: I would recommend always meeting with your professor to discuss your final research paper. I don't know about your department/field..but often times, professors will look at drafts and give feedback. Take that opportunity to get the feedback and advice, so you can know exactly what they expect. Also, hook up with other students...peer feedback is great- but reviewing others work is a great opportunity for you to learn and will help your own writing.

Overall: remember that you're just heading into grad school..you're not expected to know everything! this is a learning experience! be open, and take every opportunity to engage with your peers and professors. Don't be afraid to speak- remember, 99% of the people there want you to be successful! They don't want you to crash and burn- so think of it as a friendly environment!

Don't be scared- be excited! it's common to be nervous, but try and think about how amazing, rich, and fun it will be

Made my day.

[juilletmercredi]

n my first year, I had to take a year-long doctoral seminar with my cohort. My field is an interdisciplinary one with influences from fields ranging from the social sciences to the natural sciences to business and policy studies - but the co-instructors for the course were a sociologist and an anthropologist, and so the first year course focused primarily on sociology and anthro. My background is in psychology, which has a very different tradition of reading and theory. So my first class ever I was overloaded with more reading than I had ever done in a week, in a completely different style than I was used to. Since I was the only person in my cohort 1) straight from undergrad and 2) in psychology (the rest were sociologists, anthropologists, political scientists and one historian).

Naturally, I was terrified. I tried to share in class anyway, even though to me I sounded like an idiot. I found out from one of the co-instructors halfway through the first semester that he thought I was very thoughtful and made intriguing comments; he liked that I brought a different perspective to the class partially borne out of my unfamiliarity with sociological theory. Apparently I approached it differently. I also found out, through chatting with my cohort-mates that everyone else in my cohort was just as terrified, and almost as behind in the reading as I was. After that, I felt better. We bonded and I think we all felt more comfortable commenting in class.

Moral of the story:

1) Everyone is just as terrified as you are.

2) Everyone is behind on the reading. There's so much of it that you cannot manage to actually, thoroughly read it all. You eventually learn how to selectively choose what to read, and how to skim well enough that you know what you need to know. It takes time and practice.

3) Your professors don't expect you to think like they do. That's their job - to teach you how to think like they do. They still want to hear your thoughts and discuss, especially in seminar based classes.

4) Definitely, *definitely* always confer with your professors over final research papers. Most grad seminars are small enough that the professors can give individual attention to each student who makes an appointment with them about their papers or what not. Make that appointment when you have a solid draft, and ask for feedback. (You may get an hour and a half long interesting conversation out of it, as I did with one of my co-instructors.)

My field is interdisciplinary and so a variety of citation styles are used; I use APA, since that's my field, and I have never had a professor ask me to not use APA. I wouldn't know an endnote from a footnote. But if you are in an disciplinary field that commonly uses one style, buy the book of the style and learn it well - from memory. It will save you some time and headache.

[michigan girl]

The first semester is usually always the worst because it's a transitioning period in becoming acclimated to graduate-level reading and assignments. I remember having some form of imposter's syndrome in my first semester of courses. But later on, I realized I was overreacting and everyone felt anxious too. Once you have survived the first semester (and first year), you'll have a better understanding of each supervisor/professor's expectations.

[cokohlik]

n my first year, I had to take a year-long doctoral seminar with my cohort. My field is an interdisciplinary one with influences from fields ranging from the social sciences to the natural sciences to business and policy studies - but the co-instructors for the course were a sociologist and an anthropologist, and so the first year course focused primarily on sociology and anthro. My background is in psychology, which has a very different tradition of reading and theory. So my first class ever I was overloaded with more reading than I had ever done in a week, in a completely different style than I was used to. Since I was the only person in my cohort 1) straight from undergrad and 2) in psychology (the rest were sociologists, anthropologists, political scientists and one historian).

Naturally, I was terrified. I tried to share in class anyway, even though to me I sounded like an idiot. I found out from one of the co-instructors halfway through the first semester that he thought I was very thoughtful and made intriguing comments; he liked that I brought a different perspective to the class partially borne out of my unfamiliarity with sociological theory. Apparently I approached it differently. I also found out, through chatting with my cohort-mates that everyone else in my cohort was just as terrified, and almost as behind in the reading as I was. After that, I felt better. We bonded and I think we all felt more comfortable commenting in class.

Moral of the story:

1) Everyone is just as terrified as you are.

2) Everyone is behind on the reading. There's so much of it that you cannot manage to actually, thoroughly read it all. You eventually learn how to selectively choose what to read, and how to skim well enough that you know what you need to know. It takes time and practice.

3) Your professors don't expect you to think like they do. That's their job - to teach you how to think like they do. They still want to hear your thoughts and discuss, especially in seminar based classes.

4) Definitely, *definitely* always confer with your professors over final research papers. Most grad seminars are small enough that the professors can give individual attention to each student who makes an appointment with them about their papers or what not. Make that appointment when you have a solid draft, and ask for feedback. (You may get an hour and a half long interesting conversation out of it, as I did with one of my co-instructors.)

My field is interdisciplinary and so a variety of citation styles are used; I use APA, since that's my field, and I have never had a professor ask me to not use APA. I wouldn't know an endnote from a footnote. But if you are in an disciplinary field that commonly uses one style, buy the book of the style and learn it well - from memory. It will save you some time and headache.

Thank you so much for sharing your story and for the advice. I hope that my cohort is nice and that I'll be comfortable enough with them to actually talk to/bond with them. I haven't introduced myself to any of them yet but I'm told I'll get to meet them during TA orientation! If they are anything like the other students I've met in my department then I imagine we'll get along famously!

3) Your professors don't expect you to think like they do. That's their job - to teach you how to think like they do. They still want to hear your thoughts and discuss, especially in seminar based classes.

I love this! I always feel like I need to rise up to their level of thinking but who knows how to do that when I'm just starting graduate study, if you know what I mean. I've been reading as much of my POI's work as I can so I can get an idea of how he thinks to see how my way of thinking might cooperate (not really sure of the right word) with his.

So anxious for school to start so I can get first-hand experience... and start learning, of course.