starting Phd in 2 weeks.. worried about workload, advice please

[emily3333]

Hi I found out today I have been accepted into Phd programme, and considering this has been my dream for a while and i used to get so excited dreaming of getting in, all i feel now is doubt and worry.

I will be teaching ( 3 hours per week, its a new uni so i dont have experience of the courses) , i will have classes and will have to somehow find time to do research.

Im already feeling like I have imposter syndrome, eventhough i got a 1.1 in both my undergrad and postgrad diploma, and came up the idea for my research myself, Im feeling already that I am not smart enough, not organized enough, and am afraid i will bomb completely.

last year sometimes i worked really well, other times i procrastinated and dossed, had no routine, often only studied for 5 hours in the day, missed class ect. I know where i was going wrong and have thought alot about how i will be better and more disciplined but i fear i wont do it, or even if i do it wont be enough and wont get everything done

one thing that is scaring me, is that while I usually get A s in both exams and course work, sometimes if something is really hard or totally new to me, i have take it really slowly or i get confused. for example statistics was totally new to me this year, everyone else in my course had instruction from undergrad in basic stats and we were doing advanced research methods. i was totally baffled by it all for a good while and it worries me now when i think of the amount of time i spent on really simple things.

on top of all that im worried because i know noone in this new uni or city, and im worried about making freinds and having some sort of social life,

on top of that as i only have partial funding for this year, im stressed about money, im also stressed because i have to apply for research grant this year and wont be able to continue if i dont get it.

so im worried about everything now, any advice, how do you cope with the pressure?

thanks,

Emily

sorry this sooooooo long

Edited August 28, 2012 by emily3333

[emmm]

I doubt you will bomb, but grad school is a lot of work, and everyone struggles with imposter syndrome at times. Don't worry about not knowing anyone -- you probably won't have time for a social life (just kidding, but especially first year, it may be more true than not...).

[Tall Chai Latte]

I moved away from home for grad school as well, and didn't really know anyone when I first arrived (well, I only know one person, and he is not in the same department as me). First year was difficult for me, but luckily I had another fellow student in my cohort to commiserate with, and gradually, our friend circle expended. Towards the end of my first year/beginning of my second, I picked up new hobbies such as running and rock climbing (outdoor activities seem to be what most people are into here), at that point things finally started to get smoother, feeling more fit in etc.

The key here is: don't worry, and don't get too bitter too early on in your program. You'll experience setbacks, either in research or your social circle. If you get too beat down too early it'll be hard to preserver till dissertation.

[ktel]

I also moved away from home for grad school. My boyfriend and his family were around but I had no friends of my own! The first year was very difficult for me because of the coursework and research expectations. I found the summer difficult again because all of a sudden I didn't have coursework and had so much free, unstructured time that I felt overwhelmed and didn't know where to start my research. I also feel like an imposter fairly often and it prevents me from asking people for help when I need it.

Things that I found helpful are:

1) I joined a sports team and know 60 new people now. We have social events on a regular basis

2) Talking to people. This usually included my dad but I have actually started going to an on campus counselor just to have somebody who is removed from me personally to talk to.

[MashaMashaMasha]

I am also nervous/excited/have impostor syndrome and have been dealing with it by doing the following:

- Physical activity - good way to meet people outside the program *and* get a little zen going.

- Organization - remember that there are two kinds of successful PhD students - those that are exceptionally brilliant and those that are exceptionally hard working. If you aren't blessed with the former, become the latter through organization, time management, and hard work!

Beyond that, try to find time to explore your city, or at least your campus. Find good cheap places to eat, find scenic walk routes near your department for when you need a breather.

Every new thing comes with some kind of learning curve. Eventually you will find your rhythm!