Gifts for recommendation writers

[ghijklmn]

This may be a silly question, but what are you all doing for your recommendation writers? I'd like to do something more than just send a card, but I'm constrained by being overseas. Has anyone else gotten gifts for their recommenders? Any ideas for things I could order remotely, or should I just stick to a nice card?

[bfat]

I'll probably get one of them a nice bottle of scotch, but, you know, that's just how he rolls. Bottles of wine are also classy and slightly less remindey-of-tendency-toward-alcoholism.

ETA: I realize this doesn't help with the overseas thing. Maybe something simpler/lighter like a Starbuck's gift card or a gourmet pack of coffee? (I've never met a professor that doesn't drink coffee).

Edited November 14, 2012 by bfat

[GuateAmfeminist]

For my recommenders, I bought gift cards from the book store in town. They delivered the gift cards to the porfessors, so that it was simple. I went to a liberal arts college in a small town though, so it made it easier. You could also get your professors' addresses and buy something (including gift cards) on-line and have them mailed directly to the professors, then there will be no need to worry about the overseas thing.

[ILuvPsych2013]

I will be sending my letter writers a thank you card with a Starbucks gift card inside.

[Sparky]

I simply gave a thank-you card the year I applied. But my first year in my current program I sent holiday cards to my three LOR writers, telling them good things about my year and how it was thanks to their help (meaning more in the classroom than LORs) that I was there in the first place. Apparently this was appreciated more than alcohol would have been. Cheaper for me and more meaningful for them!

[lisajay]

my first year in my current program I sent holiday cards to my three LOR writers, telling them good things about my year and how it was thanks to their help (meaning more in the classroom than LORs) that I was there in the first place. Apparently this was appreciated more than alcohol would have been. Cheaper for me and more meaningful for them!

that's a great idea! consider it stolen—er, 'borrowed'

[ghijklmn]

Thanks guys! I like the holiday card with gift card inside idea. Somehow it seems nicer than a wayyy overpriced box of truffles, which is what I was considering (13 pieces for like $30...)

[Chai_latte]

I did a thank you note and a bookstore gift card.

[1Q84]

How much did y'all put on those gift cards out of curiosity....?

[R Deckard]

A thank you and a handshake.

[Two Espressos]

Is it expected that one gives some sort of gift to letter writers? I hadn't really thought about it. I've of course effusively thanked each one of them for agreeing to write me a letter, but should I do something more? Maybe just a thank-you card for each?

Edited November 21, 2012 by Two Espressos

[1Q84]

Well yeah these gift cards and chocolates and alcohol ideas are news to me... I've never sent gifts to reference writers. I just thought maybe that's what I've been doing wrong all these years....

[TakeruK]

I don't think gifts are necessary at all. But, I did send gifts and a card to all my letter writers because I felt that we had a good relationship, and they all helped me more than just writing a letter -- they took the time to advise me on graduate schools. It was very helpful to me since I had no idea how academia works so they were all great mentors. I really appreciated this and wanted to show it. To avoid any possible impropriety, I waited until I was about to leave the school before sending the gifts though -- especially since the profs who wrote the letters could have been my instructors and/or on my thesis committee etc.

[Gauche]

Is it expected that one gives some sort of gift to letter writers? I hadn't really thought about it. I've of course effusively thanked each one of them for agreeing to write me a letter, but should I do something more? Maybe just a thank-you card for each?

I've been told by many professors that a simple thank you is appreciative and even a personally written note or card is more than enough. Writing letters for students is part of their job, and they are more than happy to do it, especially if you're one of their favorite students. And if that's the case, more than often than not, they want to write letters of recommendation for you because they want you to succeed, so don't feel obligated about getting them something fancy to show your appreciation. If you want to, however, it's your call but it's not necessary.

[rising_star]

The only gifts I've ever given are handwritten notes thanking them for the things they've done, specifically tailored to each person obviously. I've been told that these meant a lot.

[Two Espressos]

Thanks for the responses, everyone. I think I'll send them all a short hand-written thank-you card (once I actually finish my application materials...).

[skybythelight]

For two of my letter writers, I plan on leaving hand-written thank you cards for each in their mailboxes. I haven't decided if I'm going to include a giftcard or some sort... one of them is kind of an earthy-crunchy vegetarian and I know he loves this vegan cafe in town, so I may grab him a gift card from there. The other is my hard-ass department chair and I have NO idea what she would like. Eek.

My third letter writer has also been my unofficial grad school advisor... we've had TONS of meetings to talk about programs, my strengths and weaknesses, and she's been the editor for my writing sample, which has been the most incredibly helpful thing I could have ever possibly hoped for. I also babysit for her kids occasionally. So for her, I'm going to go a bit farther and get, I'm thinking as of now, a gift card for one of the nicer restaurants in the city so that she and her husband can go have a nice night together and offer free babysitting for the night as well.

[emmm]

Gifts are NOT necessary, but notes of thanks should be -- it's just good manners. However, you may want to give a gift, depending on your relationship with the letter writers. Some may feel uncomfortable accepting gifts, however, so you should keep that in mind. I did give my letter writers gifts, and one was uncomfortable about accepting, but I bullied him (and told him I had gotten gifts for everyone who helped me). I hope he didn't mind too much. We still have a good relationship, so I think it was OK. The others didn't seem to mind at all.

[1Q84]

Oh oh, I have another question since I'm apparently very socially inept:

Do you give your gifts/thank you letters before they write the letter or after all of your applications are sent and done? I mean if you give them before, it might be (mis)interpreted as greasing the wheels, but if you give it after, then maybe your recommenders may not feel appreciated. Hmm!

[waparys]

Definitely after. What if they flake and don't submit? You need to actually be grateful for something other than them just agreeing to write it.

And I know a post-doc researcher at an Ivy who writes a lot of letters and he says a thoughtful, hand-written note is the best way to say thank you.