Campus visits

[britlitgrl583]

Some people who have made campus visits already this year have mentioned dining with faculty as part of the itinerary. I've never had the opportunity to converse with faculty outside of the classroom or office hours, so I'm a little apprehensive of this experience (especially since I've heard that some faculty members host this dinner at their own homes!). Can anyone who has been through this let us nervous nellies know what to expect and maybe what rules of etiquette are important here?

[greekdaph]

I know that "just be yourself" is rather empty advice--easier said than done, and what does it even mean, anyway?--but I think it' the best advice out there.

Other thoughts:

-Be prepared to chat not just about your scholarly interests or your the program but about typical small-talk subjects: where you're from, what you do for a living, where you've traveled, etc. And be prepared for faculty to talk about these things, too.

-If alcohol is offered, don't drink too much. :-)

-If you have any special dietary needs, you may feel more at ease if you let people know ahead of time. I'm a vegetarian 99% of the time, and I sometimes worry about being in a position where I'd feel awkward declining meat even if I don't want to eat it. Usually, this works itself out, but if it's something you're nervous about, be proactive.

-Remember that conversation sometimes interferes with eating. Sometimes, especially if you're a slow eater like me, you'll find that you've been to busy talking and listening to actually finish your food. So don't expect to be full at the end of the meal, and don't arrive so ravenously hungry that you can't enjoy the conversation because you're stuffing your face.

Though I know you're nervous, this could be very fun, too! And a great way to see if you get along well with people whom you may be working with in the future.

[Minnesotan]

-If alcohol is offered, don't drink too much. :-)

Or too little. For some reason, some profs don't like seeing people without drinks in their hands. I usually try to drink a polite 1-3 glasses of wine or beer, whatever the case may be. Hard alcohol can be disguised as a different drink later if you need to nurse it.

I'm a big guy, so it takes at least 12 drinks to make me good and tipsy, but my advice would be to drink as little as possible while still accepting the hospitality provided. I use the "no more than 1/4 of the way to drunkenness" formula when meeting new professionals (except at conferences, where drunken misbehavior is expected). While this is not technically an interview, it is definitely part of the process. They are looking for a junior colleague who they actually enjoy spending time with, someone who is collegial and interesting without being problematic.

[britlitgrl583]

Thanks, both of you! I'm excited for the visit and I know I'm probably worrying for nothing, but it just helps put my mind at ease if I know exactly what to expect I'll probably be sticking to one drink, as I'm quite a lightweight (but luckily, that's just the right amount to help me relax enough to be super-charming and witty... or so I think). If anyone else has stories about campus visits or advice they'd like to share, I'd love to hear it.

[lyonessrampant]

I think you'll relax and enjoy yourself, at least you should if this campus and these people are the ones that you will be spending the next 5 years or so of your life with. I was pretty uptight before mine. I'm not nervous about whether I'll have something to say (I competed in speech and debate for 4 years and have coached 4 years as well) but I was nervous about fitting in, you know finding "friends" and I found there were a few people I clicked with right away and the profs were cordial, engaging, and witty. As cliche as it sounds, be yourself and try to show them the type of person you are because that's probably what they'll be doing too. Have fun!