PhD? MA? or a job?

[veets]

Hi everyone- i am new here but have read through so many posts already that i figured its time to start my own question. i would appreciate any advice!

 

i am interested in pursing a clinical psych phd. i am a good candidate but that is not what i am worried about. i have been researching the funding options and cost of living in other cities, and i am just skeptical that i could really live off the stipend in a new city for 5-7 years for a few reasons:

-i would be far away from my family and friends, so travel costs would be limited

-i have always worked on the side to earn extra money and am used to having money to spend, but it doesnt seem possible while getting phd

 

other reasons that i make me doubt the phd route are financial as well...

-when i am out of the program, i will be in my early 30s with no income and who knows if i will be married or have kids by then...

-getting a phd and not working all those years means losing out on income

 

i am just in a dilemma because the work that i want to do and what i have my heart set on requires me to go get a phd. recently, i have been playing with the idea of getting a masters. however...

-it is expensive

-i dont want to appear "flakey" to my advisor and letter writers by switching to a new degree track

 

i am just worried that i wont be able to survive financially getting a phd and its hard because it is really what i want to do. plus, the possibility of starting a family is super important to me, and it appears that most of the people giving me advice do not have the same perspective as i do on this topic.

 

i am sorry for the rant but i am stressed!

 

what did you do to consider your degree/financial options?

did you go to grad school and then get married / have kids while still getting a phd? 

did you get advice from your advisor about a similar situation? what was it?

 

thanks for all the help i can get! 

 

 

[Lisa44201]

I had two kids while I was an undergrad. I'm working currently on my PhD in Psychology; my kids are now 6 and 3, respectively.

 

There are funded Master's degrees in Psych, but they are rare. 

 

My undergrad adviser was decidedly not friendly towards folks having kids; I was also the only non-trad in my program. There were a few other profs at my undergrad institution who had kids; the majority did not. That changed at the university where I got my Masters, and ditto my current location; my PhD mentor has three children (home-schooled by his wife, no less).

 

It is hard to live off a stipend, especially in Psychology, but it is doable, even with kids (and it's not like my husband makes a fortune, either). Working outside your degree program is highly discouraged in Clinical Psych especially; depending on the job, it can seriously hurt your chances for obtaining a license (supervisory hours, etc).

 

I want this degree. It meant moving my husband and kids half a continent away from his family, but we did it, because my career prospects with a PhD are a he** of a lot better than they are without one. We learned to budget a long time ago; we eat out once a month (if that), we share a car, and every penny is accounted for. The positives of this degree almost made the details inconsequential.

 

You have to want it badly enough that you're willing to struggle for it.

[juilletmercredi]

I'm in a PhD program in psychology, although not clinical.  My stipend has varied.  I think most psychology stipends are between $20,000 and $30,000, although where they fall in there depends.  When I began, my stipend was about $32,000 before taxes; I got an NSF and then it went to $30,000; now I am on an NIH-funded fellowship and my stipend is a little over $22,000.  I live in NYC.  You learn to deal: you live frugally, you make sacrifices in the short-term for long-term gain.

1. Travel funds are very limited.  I only go home once or twice a year.  It's okay - I'll finish this year.  I talk on the phone to my family a lot, and I have made new friends.

2. I started working on the side in my third year of grad school, and have ever since.  In your first couple years, it's difficult because of the coursework.  I think in clinical it may be difficult all through because you have clients to see.  But don't shortchange yourself so early - you haven't even applied and seen financial packages yet.  I lived relatively comfortably in NYC on $30,000; I had a roommate, I ate out frequently and I sometimes bought new clothes and accessories.  I only worked on the side because I was greedy, not because I was starving, lol.  You don't have to live like a monk.  If I can do that in NYC in $30,000, you can definitely do that somewhere else on $30,000 or $25,000.

3a. You'll be in your 30s in 5-6 years anyway.  You'll be in your 30s regardless of what you do. It's not like you're withdrawing from the world - you're still going to be living in the real world, hopefully doing things you love that may lead you to a partner and/or a family.  And you won't have no income if you get a job after graduate school, which most people do.  The unemployment rate for PhDs is actually very low.

3b. So you may be married or have kids.  So what?  I got married in graduate school (at the beginning of my fifth year; I just began my sixth year), and many of my colleagues also got married and had children.  One of my cohortmates had her first kid at the end of our second year.  Another cohortmate had her first baby in our third year.  I also know many academics who had (healthy, thriving) children into their mid-30s and even early 40s, after they finished their PhDs and sometimes postdocs.

I'm reading Sheryl Sandberg's book Lean In and in it she says not to quit before you quit - in other words, don't make crucial workforce decisions for a partner and children you don't even have yet.  It's entirely possible to be a parent and partner while also a graduate student.  

If what you really are passionate about requires a PhD in clinical psychology, do that!  There are thousands of students every year that survive on the stipend.  You have to critically evaluate what you are offered when you are offered it.  Obviously if you are offered $18,000 to live in NYC, then that's not viable and you can turn it down.  But you may be offered $25,000 in Madison, WI or Ann Arbor, MI, which is totally livable.

As a side note, though, if you want to do counseling practice it is possible to do that with a master's degree.  Most states license clinical social workers with an MSW to do primary mental health care.