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Huge Dilemma...out of time. Please help!


confusedkate

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Okay, so basically I accepted my #1 program, but then my #2 school came back and gave me an amazing offer that I am not sure I can turn down. Here is some more info (sorry it's long!):

 

-These are masters programs in education

-Both schools are about the same size

-Both schools have given me the same amount of funding.
**I accepted the program at school #1 about three weeks ago when I had officially received all of my offers (I did not know school #2 would come back with this additional offer), and I had not thought twice about my decision until I received this other offer.

 

 

School #1

-I love everything about school number one. It was my top choice the entire time because of the campus, the classes, the location, and the feeling I got when I was there.  It is in a new city, but I am not afraid of moving and getting a new experience.

-It has been consistently ranked #1 or 2 in the country in my area of interest (and top 5 in my specific program)

-It is located in the south where I always pictured myself working/moving

-I have already accepted the offer, registered for classes, etc.

***-The one problem I have encountered since accepting has been my inability to get internship interviews/offers.  The program requires at least a one semester internship, but most people work on campus in other areas throughout the two years. Both areas that I am qualified for/want to work in sent out an internship opportunity and I was not chosen to even interview.  My cover letter/resume are good so I can only assume they are giving preference to second years in the program and know who they want before sending out the opportunity (as they are required to do). My only hope would to be to keep applying and hopefully end up working somewhere random in the university before doing my official internship in my second year.

 

 

School #2

-Is my undergrad university. The program is good, but I was excited to go somewhere new.  I also think school #1 puts a lot more funding and care into their program (they have an entire mini-campus for this area of study, while school #2 only has one building for classes).

-It is ranked in the top 15 for my specific program

-It is near my home so I would be able to stay near my family (although my boyfriend is closer to school #2 so this is a double edged sword). My professors and friends are also excited by the idea that I would stay.

-I would be fine continuing to stay at the school (obviously I went there for undergrad so I love it), but I won't get new experiences in life or on my resume... Is it bad to go to the same school for both, I don't know when it's a top ranked undergrad and grad school.

-During visit weekend we interviewed for different internships because you are supposed to have one internship for the entire first year and another for the entire second year.  Usually you find out after you accept what you are matched with.

***-The program director from school #2 called me a few nights ago and offered me a guaranteed internship in my #1 or #2 choice (up to me) if I go to their program. These internships are HIGHLY SELECTIVE and I know that the reason I am getting the opportunity is because I went here for undergrad (which isn't a bad thing). If these were job offers, I would take either of them in a heartbeat. And at this school it could very well lead to a job in these areas (just happened to the person who held one of the internships this year).

 

 

So basically, the one major problem I have had come up with school #1 is the one perfect thing about school #2.  Do I go with the chance to put the top program on my resume or the amazing experience on my resume???  Please help.  I only have until monday at midnight to decide and I have never been so completely torn about anything.

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I'm not familiar with internships as mandatory for the two years you'll be in grad for for an Ed Masters (I'm in the sciences). For school #1, do most students end up in some type of internship the first year? And where? Is it mandatory or just incredibly helpful in terms of a CV and getting a job later?

 

So you want to work in the area of school #1 eventually? I sounds like family and boyfriend may be a distraction. Will you be more pumped and motivated at school #1? Sounds like it's about the guaranteed internship at #2 that will pull you from what you seem to be pretty sure will be an amazing experience at school #1. Will going to school #1 make you more competitve for a internship vs. school #2, pretending that neither will give you one the first year?

 

Are these internships out-of-state, summer only? Not sure how they're structured.

 

I feel your pain. Here's one thing I know - being away from family, I get more work done and I'm more involved in department things in general. I love going to new places, it keeps me motivated. That's me. I've always managed to find internships in the sciences because I'm one of the better students from my undergrad, and it sounds like this is the case for you.

 

Just my two cents, but one mistake I keep making is that I always did the safe thing, the practical thing, and it's not always a guarantee for things working out. Will you regret not having gone to school #1 if you choose #2?

 

Sounds like you have the perfect problem :)  Either will work out in the end, I'm just learning not to make decisions that leave me feeling unsettled. Whatever you choose, be happy with your choice. No regrets!

Edited by warprin
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To answer your questions:

 

Since I am coming straight out of undergrad and don't have any real experience in these areas, the internships/experience I will have is equally as important to me as the classes and other parts of the program.

 

My boyfriend is near school #1 and my family is near school #2 so distractions would be pretty equal at either, but neither are on campus with me so I would have plenty of time to focus on my work.

 

How the internships work:

School #1: internships/practicum are required for 1-2 semesters of the two year program.  They are unpaid but usually in an area of interest on the campus.  Additionally, students tend to have assistantships throughout the program, which are paid (more like jobs on campus) and give experience to add to a resume (which is VERY important in my area).  While you are guaranteed to have an internship (usually in the beginning of the second year), assistantships you have to apply for like any other job.  This is where I have been having trouble getting interviews and the possibility of not having an assistantship or getting one in an area that is completely not my interest/focus is high.

 

School #2: internships are required throughout the program to give practical experience.  Usually students do one the first year and one the second year and we interviewed for them during the visit weekend. They are highly competitive, but you are guaranteed to have one.  The last minute offer that I've been made is that I've been guaranteed my first or second choice (probably the second choice the first year and then the first choice the second year as I go into the job search for that area).  In many cases having these internships often leads to a job offer upon graduation.

 

And yes, it's an amazing problem to have. And I am soooo grateful.  I'm just really confused and torn. I think I'll regret missing out on school #1, but I know that I will also regret not taking the internships at school #2 because I know that these amazing opportunities will not come along at school #1.

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Okay, got it. So... if you were to go to school #1 and have a problem getting an internship the first year, I assume you would be completely ticked off.

 

Sounds like school #2 really wants you and is willing to promise *in writing* that you'll be guaranteed two internships. That's tough.

 

If getting an internship year one is a major concern, and you like your undergrad school, I'd say go with #2, especially if they're offering internships that's really fit. I guess you can always go South later!

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Of course you'll get new experiences in life - going to grad school is different from undergrad.

School #2 is a top-ranked school; you will have a guaranteed internship of your choice for 2 years instead of one; AND it's an amazing funding offer.  You also have the potential to save a lot of money by staying with family.  You should definitely pick School #2 and not even look back!  And yes, you can always move to the South later.  And once you're ready, you'll have much less debt.

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Also, a small update: I have been leaning a lot towards school #2 because of the internship opportunities.  However, it turns out that my boyfriend (who is near school #1) is not as supportive about me changing my mind as he initially said he would be.  I knew he would be upset since we have already been doing long distance for the past year, but I didn't know I would pretty much be picking a great program with internships or a great program with no internships but saves my relationship.  Any thoughts on this? I don't want to ever let a guy get in the way of my schooling, but I would be lying if I said he isn't a factor.

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Also, a small update: I have been leaning a lot towards school #2 because of the internship opportunities.  However, it turns out that my boyfriend (who is near school #1) is not as supportive about me changing my mind as he initially said he would be.  I knew he would be upset since we have already been doing long distance for the past year, but I didn't know I would pretty much be picking a great program with internships or a great program with no internships but saves my relationship.  Any thoughts on this? I don't want to ever let a guy get in the way of my schooling, but I would be lying if I said he isn't a factor.

You need to do what is best for you. 

 

I would not drop your #1 school just because you are afraid that you will not find an internship.  I'm pretty sure that your school or program will have resources available to you in that regard.

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So he lied about being supportive and is holding you back? I would personally choose the school, but I guess it depends on how much you're willing to compromise for this guy. You know something that's great at killing relationships? Regret. Kinda like on 17 Again. I mean sure, not going far away now may save the relationship for now, but can you make this decision without heavily regretting what could have been? Because if not, your resulting unhappiness may cause problems down the line

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So he lied about being supportive and is holding you back? 

 

It's not so much that he lied about being supportive. It's that he is much more upset/disappointed than he let on when I first mentioned that I might stay at my undergrad.  And I don't really blame him... our entire relationships has been long distance and we had been continuing on with the hope that I would get into this school near him (which also happens to be the #1 school for what I want to do) and our relationship would be so much easier.  We wouldn't have to only see each other once per month (max), or spend thousands of dollars each year on plane tickets, and if I wanted to see him he could just hop in the car and make the two hour drive.

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I told school #2 that I was going to take their offer.  So now I am officially enrolled at 2 schools.  And I'm kinda disappointed.  I feel like my decision is the right one (to take this amazing offer), but I don't know if I can let go of the school that has been my dream for so long.  I have two weeks to back out of the offer (I'd be a huge asshole if I did...but it is what it is). So for now I guess I'm just trying to see if I can get happy about my decision or if I need to go back and stick with school #1. 

 

Feeling even MORE stressed now.

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