Can I reject a previously accepted offer?

[colby11]

Hello,

 

Hope everybody is doing well during these stressful days of graduate madness. I am looking for the collective wisdom of this community to help me decide a delicate matter. I was accepted to three schools for a masters program. Two of these schools allowed me to submit an application for financial aid and will be notifying me in the next couple of weeks for what kind of funding I am eligible. However, the third school (which actually is the first one I was accepted to) will not disclosed any potential financial aid I am eligible to, unless I accept their offer first. They gave me a deadline to accept the offer (May 2nd). So my question to the group is: do you think it is appropriate to accept this school's offer, see how much funding they offer, compare such fin aid package with what the other two school offer and then if its not affordable drop the offer?.

They do not ask for a deposit or anything to accept the offer, so it's not like they can take that money from me.

 

Any thoughts will be appreciated.

[Djentbot]

It's generally considered bad form to decline a previously accepted offer, but this school's practice of not disclosing financial aid until you've already made your decision is TERRIBLE form. I would go ahead and accept it to find out what they offer, and if the offer is no good then I wouldn't feel bad at all turning it down considering how the school is handling the process.

[secfh18]

in my opinion it is bad form on your part. maybe because of my background, but just think of everyone you are affecting. i had an experience this year of being wait listed at my first choice, and got into my second choice fully funded (which my PI told me, this school also doesn't disclose the financial info before the student accepts the offer, so I think it may be more common than people think) so I will probably take it before hearing back from my first choice (deadline of May 1)... I would be completely heartbroken if someone took a spot I coveted only to go back on their acceptance later because of a better offer elsewhere, and completely screw me out of my first choice (just read some of the comments in the wait list agony post and you'll understand what i mean- I feel bad for even making my second choice wait so long for me to make a decision because i know theres someone who wants the spot i've been offered) if i end up finding out after i accept my offer at my second choice that i get into my first, of course i would want to accept, but I will have already made a commitment to my second choice, and my PI there will be counting on me. Everyone has to make tough choices this season, and while I obviously sympathize with your situation, remember there is always someone else just praying to get that open spot... everything is a series of tradeoffs. My advice, get in touch with some current graduate students to see if they know what the 'average' student gets. or ask your PI what is typical. Hopefully this helped a little! In then end only you can make the decision, and sometimes it pays to be selfish... but always be aware of bridges you may burn in the future, and remember there are almost always other students wishing they had that spot!

[TakeruK]

I also agree that it's bad form to take an offer and reject it. I also agree with Djentbot that it is even worse for the school to not expect students to take offers without knowing financial aid. In addition, with masters programs, especially ones where you are expected to pay for yourself, it's not as frowned upon to change your mind, in my opinion.

 

Therefore, in your shoes, I would wait until May 2 in case the other schools make a decision. I would let that school know that I really would like to know the financial aid offer. If they still refuse to promise me a number in writing (or give me an extension) I would take their offer on May 2 and then reject it if a better one comes along. This has negative impact on people of course, but it is not your responsibility. It is the school's responsibility to not lose spots to good students like secfh18 by giving students like colby11 all the information they need so that they can make an informed decision.

 

In my opinion, we, as a body of current and potential graduate students, should not let the mindset that we really want to go to grad school force us into making bad decisions for ourselves in order to maximize our chances of getting in. I feel that actions like the school refusing to disclose financial aid is exploiting all graduate students, including the ones that lose a spot because someone will turn down the offer after they realise the funding is crap. 

 

If I was in the OP's shoes, I would have some lower limit of financial aid necessary for me to even attend. What if I accept the offer and the financial aid is way too low? I'm not going to feel bad at all that I had to turn down the offer--instead, I would be angry at the school for withholding useful information and causing me to waste my time, their staff to waste their time, and potentially a student like secfh18 to lose out on a spot.

[bsharpe269]

I normally majorly look down on people accepting an offer and then rejecting it but I don't think this school is giving you another option...

[Vene]

It's generally considered bad form to decline a previously accepted offer, but this school's practice of not disclosing financial aid until you've already made your decision is TERRIBLE form. I would go ahead and accept it to find out what they offer, and if the offer is no good then I wouldn't feel bad at all turning it down considering how the school is handling the process.

This is basically my thought process.