Do I still ask for a LOR even if it won't be all positive?

[ssynny]

Hi all,

 

So I'm in a tough spot. I work(ed) for one of the top researchers in my field of interest for about the last year. He was also my adviser during undergrad and taught many of the specialized classes for my major. He wrote me a nice recommendation letter for grad school this past app season, but in the end I didn't make the final cut. He offered me a joint position with him and another lab and I took it. Unfortunately, it didn't work out. We had a large field campaign where I came in as my boss was leaving, so a grad student was the field leader while I was there. A lot of pretty crappy things happened with some injuries and my relationship being soured with the grad student after he conducted some VERY inappropriate behavior. I should have reported him, but I didn't and instead kept my distance. Apparently for the field report he wrote, he said that my attitude was poor and that I resisted his orders and was not a good member of the team. I mean, yeah, I definitely tried not to work alone with him after the incident. Anyway, my boss was meeting with all of us after we got back from the field and started telling me that he was very disappointed in my performance and thought I was unsuited for field work. I tried to explain to him what happened, but he loves that grad student. My boss literally told me that he didn't believe what I was telling him and the said grad student was a nice kid. He then told me that he was firing me because he needs someone he can rely on in the field. He had already decided that I was being fired before even talking to me or asking me how I thought things went. I knew he was a cold person, but I didn't think he was that unreasonable. I did a great job in the field. I learned all of my tasks very fast and did them well and in a timely manner. But my boss then told me that he could no longer write me a positive recommendation letter for a new job. That really blows. He is really really well known in the field. I need a letter from him, but this is what he said: "I would be willing to write a recommendation, and I would have positive things to say about your performance in the lab, based on your work before the field season. I would add that I do not consider you to be a good candidate for remote fieldwork, however." So what should I do? This is a really important reference, one that could speak about my work related to my field. But what about that negative part? I have another person I would ask for a rec letter from last summer who could say that I did a great job in the field when I was working with her, but that doesn't change the fact that something was negative was said about me. What to do.....

[Thesis]

Hi, you still can ask for explanation from him, if you want a letter from him, so you need to show him you are involved and you are interested in knowing your weaknesses and what to do (according to him) to improve yourself.. If you really do not feel the thing, you still can remember that the most important thing is not the titles or the position of the recommender but the "story" told in the letter, look for someone else! Good luck

[tuckbro]

NO.

[CageFree]

Basically, what he said is he won't write a helpful letter. At least he warned you in advance. A good letter from someone less "important" is way more helpful than a lukewarm (let alone negative) letter from a superstar.

 

In other words... no.

[ssynny]

Hi all,

 

Thank you very much for your responses! He still needed me for the rest of the summer because I'm the only person who actually knows what's going on in the lab (even better that him), so I'm still working there until next month. I've been doing a great job despite everything and he's happy about that, so I might talk to him about the rec letter later and see if he would still say negative things. But I guess you guys are right. If he can't be all positive, I shouldn't ask him for one, regardless of how well-known he is... :\