I've declined an offer from a school and received an email asking for feedback - is what I have to say too petty?

[babybird]

I interviewed with a school January 29th-31st. I received an acceptance a week after my interview. I enjoyed the program and the school, but had a few thoughts on the way they kept in contact over the next few weeks.

 

• Two weeks after my interview, they sent an email with a link to a video promotion of "what it's like to be a part of their program."
• Three weeks (Feb 20th, no-where near the April 15th) after my interview, they sent out a pushy email reminding me that they had a waitlist, and while they would love to have me join their program, they appreciated my decision as soon as possible as many people on the waitlist had indicated that this school was their first choice.
• Four weeks after my interview, they sent an email stating that "decision time can be overwhelming, and we want to help you decide! Here is a link to a blog written by a current student at our program on how she decided where to go to graduate school. Also, have more links to videos about our school!"
• Five weeks after my interview, they sent an email to "provide certain consumer information about the university to prospective students."

 

The constant, weekly contact by this school was a HUGE turn-off to me. Getting tons of emails with promotional videos random blogs posts... Ain't no-body got time for that. And, I understand that you're required to provide financial information, but why not wait and spam people with that after they've accepted? The only email I can accept was the pushy email, but I did feel that it came WAY too early in the process. I still had interviews to attend at that point! There was no way I could make a decision for this school.

 

It felt like the school was pushing themselves down my throat, sending one email a week to keep their school on the forefront of my mind. This is the ONLY school that has kept in constant contact like this - very disparate compared to the other schools (n=9) with whom I have interviewed.

 

Due to a number of other reasons (research fit, location preference, job for my husband), today I declined my offer at this university. The program directed sent me an email asking for any feedback I may have about the application process. Is it petty of me to mention this unnecessary level of contact? I would phrase it in a more neutral way than I have spoken here... perhaps pointing out that their school was the only one to send me one email a week, and it seems like that level of contact is not how other schools operate and maybe they should consider their practices.

 

Just wanted some feedback over whether this is worth mentioning. Thanks!

[TakeruK]

I get the feeling that most of the promotional things you got were part of an institute-wide recruiting campaign that the department may or may not be able to opt-out of. The "pushy email" is probably the only thing they have control over and I think it's reasonable to send such an email around Feb 20th, in my opinion. Although Feb 20 is far from April 15, I think it is okay for a school to remind applicants that time is of the essence at around this point, as long as it is not saying you *must* decide now. The two-body problem complicates things for you, but even if that wasn't the case, you are still free to take as long as you need, pushy email or not! For other people, perhaps Feb 20 is a good time to start seriously thinking about their decision and the email might be targeted towards that kind of applicant instead. 

 

If it were me, I would not mention this feedback unless it contributed strongly to my reason for my decision. But that's just me! Also, personally, I think grad schools should aggressive "recruit" their top candidates and providing information like blog posts from students in their program would be helpful (although these would obviously be biased!). Overall, I think schools should do more to attract students to their program, instead of taking the "disinterested academic" approach. Just my opinion.

[babybird]

I get the feeling that most of the promotional things you got were part of an institute-wide recruiting campaign that the department may or may not be able to opt-out of. The "pushy email" is probably the only thing they have control over and I think it's reasonable to send such an email around Feb 20th, in my opinion. Although Feb 20 is far from April 15, I think it is okay for a school to remind applicants that time is of the essence at around this point, as long as it is not saying you *must* decide now. The two-body problem complicates things for you, but even if that wasn't the case, you are still free to take as long as you need, pushy email or not! For other people, perhaps Feb 20 is a good time to start seriously thinking about their decision and the email might be targeted towards that kind of applicant instead. 

 

If it were me, I would not mention this feedback unless it contributed strongly to my reason for my decision. But that's just me! Also, personally, I think grad schools should aggressive "recruit" their top candidates and providing information like blog posts from students in their program would be helpful (although these would obviously be biased!). Overall, I think schools should do more to attract students to their program, instead of taking the "disinterested academic" approach. Just my opinion.

 

Thanks so much for your perspective! It's really helpful for me to consider. Clearly, they can't cater to every prospective student, and I don't want to needlessly bash a school just because I don't prefer their approach. (: 

[MathCat]

I think departments should do more to actively recruit their top prospective students, but it should be more personal than "hey look at these videos". What TakeruK said about these being campus-wide is probably correct, though. Still, I think I would have been turned off by the pushy email too - all my offers have included a paragraph about how they would appreciate hearing earlier if known, but that I have until <deadline> to decide. That gets the point across without seeming pushy by sending another email.

 

As for whether to include this in the feedback, I wouldn't, unless it is really the main reason for your decision.

[babybird]

I think departments should do more to actively recruit their top prospective students, but it should be more personal than "hey look at these videos". What TakeruK said about these being campus-wide is probably correct, though. Still, I think I would have been turned off by the pushy email too - all my offers have included a paragraph about how they would appreciate hearing earlier if known, but that I have until <deadline> to decide. That gets the point across without seeming pushy by sending another email.

 

As for whether to include this in the feedback, I wouldn't, unless it is really the main reason for your decision.

 

I'm just curious... what more would you like to see departments do?

 

Thanks for your perspective as well! It's helpful to get outside of my feelings of being annoyed.

[MathCat]

Well, as an example, three departments had professors contacting me personally to discuss my interests, fit of the program, answer questions, etc. These were not professors I had indicated on my application (I did not indicate anyone on any of them), but they were all in my stated general area of interest. Another program offered me a fellowship and said that indicated their keen interest in having me, but all correspondence they initiated was from the grad secretary only. I understand professors are for the most part too busy to be looking at applications and contacting students themselves, and usually it goes the other way (and I did email professors), but it did impact my view of the departments. I still think all are great programs, but the ones that contacted me seem like more ambitious departments that are actively trying to recruit the people they want and improve their ranking (I'm not talking just recruiting students), while the other seems to not care as much who they end up with - perhaps relying on name power, as they are an Ivy.

 

This difference may just come down to how applications are reviewed, though. I think some of the programs review applications by sending them to the research group that you indicated, whereas others have general admissions committees. So perhaps the ones that contacted me are just because they did individually review my file, while at the other school that didn't happen. So perhaps I am reading too much into it.

[bsharpe269]

A couple of the schools I visited had students/professors contact me to answer questions. When I responded to the emails with questions, they went out of they way to send long, thoughtful responses. The additional info has been very helpful in making a decision. Another school has had no contact at all other than the official email from the secretary. I like it when the programs go out of their way to recruit me because I think it can be indicative of the attention that I might get as a grad student in the department.

[babybird]

Well, as an example, three departments had professors contacting me personally to discuss my interests, fit of the program, answer questions, etc. These were not professors I had indicated on my application (I did not indicate anyone on any of them), but they were all in my stated general area of interest. Another program offered me a fellowship and said that indicated their keen interest in having me, but all correspondence they initiated was from the grad secretary only. I understand professors are for the most part too busy to be looking at applications and contacting students themselves, and usually it goes the other way (and I did email professors), but it did impact my view of the departments. I still think all are great programs, but the ones that contacted me seem like more ambitious departments that are actively trying to recruit the people they want and improve their ranking (I'm not talking just recruiting students), while the other seems to not care as much who they end up with - perhaps relying on name power, as they are an Ivy.

 

This difference may just come down to how applications are reviewed, though. I think some of the programs review applications by sending them to the research group that you indicated, whereas others have general admissions committees. So perhaps the ones that contacted me are just because they did individually review my file, while at the other school that didn't happen. So perhaps I am reading too much into it.

 

See, that kind of additional contact/communication is something that I appreciate but would never expect. My school sent out stuff that felt more like college recruitment/advertising, and it was a waste of time rather than address the pertinent things like research interests, fit of program, additional questions, etc.

[juilletmercredi]

I would mention it briefly, but only if you were also going to contact them with other, more substantial feedback. I wouldn't say anything about them being the only school who did it or that this is "not how schools operate" - keep it personal and how it affected YOU and your decision making. I would more say something about how the weekly contact felt overwhelming, that you felt pushed to make a decision way too early, but that the contact was too general and impersonal to really contribute positively to your outlook on the program. Keep it focused on your feelings and thoughts (and not objective statements about what other schools do or don't do) and how it affected your perceptions of the program and university.

[babybird]

I would mention it briefly, but only if you were also going to contact them with other, more substantial feedback. I wouldn't say anything about them being the only school who did it or that this is "not how schools operate" - keep it personal and how it affected YOU and your decision making. I would more say something about how the weekly contact felt overwhelming, that you felt pushed to make a decision way too early, but that the contact was too general and impersonal to really contribute positively to your outlook on the program. Keep it focused on your feelings and thoughts (and not objective statements about what other schools do or don't do) and how it affected your perceptions of the program and university.

Fabulous advice! I've been struggling with good, constructive phrasing in addition to trying to decide if I should say anything at all, so this is a really helpful comment. Thanks!