Spouse / S.O. job hunt anxiety as part of waiting it out

[med latte]

Hi, all.

I applied to programs out of state, so any admission will require my partner to find work in a new city. That is making this waiting period even more difficult. We hope I get an acceptance as soon as possible so he'll have time to job hunt and interview in the new place. In the meantime, he's looking at jobs and is beginning to talk to people in his field in those cities. If he does get a job quickly, he'll move before I do, as I currently have a good job that I'll want to hang onto until just before I need to be on campus (unless his job brings in a remarkable amount of moolah, but I'm not holding my breath).

Anyone else dealing with this? I see a lot online about couples who are both grad students or both working in academia, but little about one PhD student and a spouse in industry. Lots of uncertainty....both exciting and terrifying. We just wish we could begin planning NOW. But we won't know if we're moving or where for weeks (feels like ages...).

[bicsy]

I'm in a similar position. My partner and I are both in our final year of undergrad, and I applied to PhD programs all over the country. We're hoping she can find a job and begin building her career in the city I end up for grad school.

We're lucky in that neither of us are professionally tied down to our current location, but as you say there's a ton of uncertainty. Not knowing where we'll end up for the next 5+ years is nerve wracking, and it's impossible to do any concrete planning until I get an idea of where I'll be admitted. Plus I'm feeling kinda guilty that my partner's life/career plans rest on my final decision of which school to attend.

Sorry I can't offer much useful advice, but hopefully it's comforting to know that others are dealing with similar situations. Also, no matter where you end up, keep in mind that you will have a whole new city/state to explore as a couple. For me, that's one of the most exciting things about this process (besides the opportunity to do really cool research)!

[Need Coffee in an IV]

We are in a similar situation as well! Except we have a possibility of being long distance. My boyfriend actually went to Alaska for grad school, but he realized that grad school wasn't for him. So now he is applying for jobs. He already has some leads since he is applying for federal jobs which is a lot easier because he is a veteran. But the possible locations aren't close to any of my possible grad schools. Our plan is for him to accept a job and work there for several years while I'm at grad school. We don't have our hearts set on a certain state, but we would like to stay in/near the mid Atlantic region. So after grad school I'll apply for jobs in that region and he will try to get a transfer. Long distance sucks but we are making it work.