Living alone vs shared apt

[virtua]

Hi, guys

What do you think guys are the advantages/disadvantages of living alone or living with roommates? I have been living alone, but never lived with roommates, now I want to save money by living in a shared apt but still I`m not sure if I should do this, so I wonder if I can get used to living with roommates.

[fuzzylogician]

I mean, it's what you expect. You save on costs, but you give up on privacy. Some roommate situations are such that your roommates also become your friends, so you might cook meals or go out together occasionally. More often, probably, you each have your own lives and aside from seeing each other in the hallway or kitchen, you won't interact too much. Advantages? mostly saving money. Also, if you are a person who needs to be around other people or gets lonely, it's instant company. If you have plants or pets, they might take care of them if you have to travel. Disadvantages? If all goes well, you're mostly giving up on privacy. Your roommate might have friends over when you want to sleep, or a boyfriend/girlfriend might hang out more than you like, or they might play their music too loud, or they might take over the bathroom just when you need to use it or finish all the hot water, that kind of thing. Usually, if people are reasonable, you can work that out. If things go bad, well, that can take on all kinds of shapes. You can read horror stories online from here until next year. People not paying their share of the bills on time, eating your food, causing damage, stealing, renting out shares space for extra money at your expense, doing illegal things, being extremely loud with complete disregard for your well being, not doing any housework, the list goes on. These things are unlikely and there are ways to minimize the risk of them, but obviously there are no 100% guarantees. You can read up online about how to be careful of Craigslist scams and such like, and there are ways of choosing your roommates carefully. The internet is full of advice, and I am fairly certain you can find some here too, if you use the search function. Many students live with roommates and make it work, so I'm sure you could too. 

[St Andrews Lynx]

I'd say it depends on your personality how well you adjust to living with roommates.

I'm a stereotypical introvert - I need private "down time" at the end of the day to offset being around people. I also need a lot of personal space so tend to retreat to my bedroom so that I'm not around anyone. This makes me a bad roommate: I don't really interact with other roommates, I'll maybe stay out of their way, too. 

But...there are plenty of people who are looking for that in a roommate. Some people want roommates they can be friends with and hang out watching TV with in the evenings. Other people prefer to have more space and want to get on with their private lives. I've had plenty of what I'd consider "good" roommate set-ups in the latter category...but I'm living alone now and that feels awesome. 

If you are keen on your own space then you might want to look for older roommates or those holding down jobs & not in school. I had a positive experience acting more as a lodger: my roommate owned the house and rented out the spare bedroom. 

[sjoh197]

If you can afford to live alone, or move someone slightly less expensive but still alone.... I would personally do that. Unless you have a specific friend in mind, roommates can be a huge gamble. Also... if you've been living alone, you have all of your furniture and personal items. You might have to downsize. Would you furnish the apartment and let other people potentially ruin your stuff? Can you deal with the lack of privacy as others mentioned?

[random_grad]

During your time as a sole occupant of a living space, have you been longing to have someone there when you come home? or where you glad to get home, put on your favorite music and dine in peace? if it is the former - right on, go for it. if not... cost of living is a great motivation, and you might be able to find folks out there who just want to cut down on rent and otherwise live separately, but many expect a friend and don't get it when you're trying to impose some sort of organization around the house. c'mon, it's just a few dirty dishes! after all, we're buddies, right? / oh, my dog who barks at sunrise? but he's so adorable! Seriously, unless money is a real issue, I personally wouldn't bother. It can really get on your nerves, hence affecting your productivity.

 

[AP]

The first time I came to the US was when I moved to grad school to live with two people I did not know. Before then, I lived with my siblings, so I had my share of fighting and tolerating stuff. 

I like living with other people for all the reasons mentioned by @fuzzylogician but also, it teaches you to be patient and mindful of others. This may seem unimportant but think about it: collaborative work depends on us being able to tolerate the minute obsessions each of us have. I know I can be difficult sometimes and my roommates help me improve my people skills. I mean, eventually I'd suppose I'd live with a partner so I'd better train myself to be flexible hahaha. 

For example, whenever I have a party I am anxious about the carpet being ruined, cups being broken, people messing up the toilet. Last party, I relaxed and had a great time, and when everybody was gone, my roommates helped me clean everything and woke up the next day before I did to continue tidying stuff up. If anything, living with people helps you be more empathetic (I my sound like a bitch to you! but I am not!). 

NOTE: I moved in with people I know from the program (not the first two that I had when I just moved to the US). This helped a lot because I wanted people to whom I could talk to about money, garbage, etc. without it being awkward. Also, my top priority was to get a car so I needed to save money. 

NOTE 2: I rewrote this like three times. It's Sunday morning, apologies for my lack of style and overcharged sensitivity. 

AP